Chapter 10
Gemma
Five months into our marriage, three months into our partnership, and Saint and I have become unstoppable.
Seven successful operations. Millions in Nero losses. Adrian's security budget has tripled, his paranoia is palpable, and the other families are starting to question his competence.
We started slow with the first hit on the painting, then escalated. By now, month three of our partnership, we're hitting his shipments directly, and Adrian is about to lose his mind.
And through it all, Saint and I have been fucking and scheming like the world is ours for the taking.
It's intoxicating. Addictive. The best I've felt since...maybe ever.
It's not perfect. Saint won't let me get my hands dirty, which is a huge point of contention between us.
And yet, we're in this together. Partners.
Which is why I'm standing next to him outside of my family's mansion, even though it's absolutely the last place I'd like to be. I've been putting off this family dinner for months, but with everything happening, Adrian has insisted.
Saint's hand is warm against my lower back. "We can leave. Say you're sick." He's being attentive, which is nice, but unnecessary. I don't want to be here, but I'm not going to run from Adrian.
"I'm fine."
Saint sighs. "Adrian isn't going to be pleased. He's given me a seat at the table, and several warehouses, and he's still getting hit. I don't want him to take his anger out on you."
It's sweet that Saint wants to protect me, but I don't need it.
"Adrian is going to bite his tongue tonight," I say. "This invite isn't from him. It's from Sera, and he'll do anything he can to please her."
Saint's green eyes search me, and I try not to fold under the intense pressure of his stare. "Fine, but if you want to go, we go." He holds out his arm, escorting me from the car to the front door. I ignore the guards that I see, trying to calm my nerves as we enter my family home.
It opens before we can knock with my brother Luc appearing on the other side.
I'm surprised to see him; I figured he would have gone back to L.A.
after my wedding. If he's still in town, it means Adrian is circling the wagons.
Luc is the family mediator—he only stays when Adrian needs someone to smooth things over or assess a situation.
His presence means Adrian is worried enough to keep all his pieces on the board.
I hold back a smirk at the thought.
Adrian hates when Luc is in town.
This is so delicious.
"Gemma," he goes to hug me, but Saint pulls me back. Luc glares, but he doesn't make another move. "You look nice."
"Thank you." I brush past him into the foyer.
Luc might not have played the same role in my forced marriage, but he made no move to stop it.
It's been months since I've been home, and even longer since my mother passed, and it strikes me how everything looks the same.
It's disconcerting, and I can't help the part of me that longs to see my mother turn the corner and greet me with a hug and air kiss.
She doesn't. Instead, my sister-in-law appears.
She looks radiant. Glowing. Her hand rests on a small but visible baby bump.
She's pregnant.
Again.
Because of course she is.
"It's so good to see you." Sera pulls me in for a hug. The hardness of her rounding stomach bumps mine, and I feel ill. "I've missed you. I haven't seen you since we did coffee a few months ago."
I hug her back stiffly. Sera is effusive in her affection, touchier than any of us are used to, and as much as I like her, I'm still getting used to how warm she can be.
"How's Angelo?" I ask.
Sera smiles, and I don't miss the light in her eyes—a mother's love. "He's perfect. I wish he could have stayed up to see you, but he's been teething, and he needed to sleep," she laughs. "For all our sakes."
I nod, ready to suggest lunch so we can catch up, when Adrian emerges, and the entire conversation halts.
My brother looks tired. Older. There are new lines around his eyes, and his mouth is turned down in a frown. I swear I even spot a touch of gray at his temples.
Being Don isn't as easy as he thought it would be. And I haven't been helping.
Good. I want him to suffer.
That's the whole fucking point.
"Saint. Gemma." He nods to both of us. "Thank you for coming." He's formal in a way that makes my chest ache. We're strangers now. Allies and nothing more.
This whole dinner feels like a farce, and a deep sadness overtakes me. I want to leave, but I know we can't.
"Family is important," Saint says smoothly. The mocking lilt in his voice is not missed by anyone, and Sera's smile falters slightly.
"I've missed being home," I say, trying to build a bridge for Sera's sake. "It'll be nice to eat something familiar."
Sera smiles. Saint's brow raises. And Luc grins. Only Adrian stares ahead, face cold and hard.
"We should go into the dining room," Sera says. "We can have drinks in there."
I nod, following Sera, listening quietly while she chats. She talks about Angelo and her work, her words coming a mile a minute. I can't focus on anything other than the back of my brother's head. I try not to stare daggers into it, but it's hard not to let my anger go in his presence.
"Mrs. Nero," Grant, our butler, nods to Sera as she walks in. "Dinner is ready to be served."
Sera frowns slightly. "Oh," she says. "I thought we'd have a drink and chat first."
"I had the schedule changed." Adrian pulls out Sera's chair, but his eyes don't leave Saint and me. He watches as Saint guides me into my chair.
"But—"
He presses a kiss to her forehead. "You need rest." He looks up at the three of us. "I'm sure you all can understand."
No one says anything.
It doesn't take long for food to make its way to us, and small talk starts. It's excruciating.
Sera asks about my life, and I give vague answers. Saint handles most of the conversation, playing the role of devoted husband. Not perfectly—he still snipes at Adrian every chance he can get, but I don't mind it.
It's a testament to our efforts that Adrian takes it, eyes narrowing only slightly.
He knows he needs to play nice with Saint. I bite back the smile that this knowledge gives me.
"So," Adrian says, cutting into his steak. "Any news?"
The question hangs in the air. He's not asking about the weather, and we all know it.
That smile I'd been trying to hold back vanishes.
"No," I say shortly. "No news."
Sera reaches across the table, squeezes my hand. "It'll happen. These things take time."
"How long did it take you?" The question comes out sharper than I intended. "Once?" They got pregnant after a one-night stand, so Sera's the last person I want lecturing me about waiting.
She blinks. "This time it took three months."
I snort, knocking back my wine. "It's been five."
"The average is six," Sera says. "Maybe—"
Adrian interrupts. "They don't need a biology lesson," he snaps. Sera's eyes narrow, but she keeps her mouth shut. My brother has taught her well. "Besides, I asked you all here because Sera and I have some news." He looks at his wife with genuine warmth. "We're having twins."
I hear Saint inhale sharply.
Twins.
Not just pregnant. Not just one baby. Twins.
Fuck.
"Congratulations," I hear myself say. My voice sounds distant. Hollow. I'm not sure how to feel in this moment.
"Thank you," Sera beams. "We just found out, and we're over the moon." Adrian gives her a genuine smile. "It's why I've been trying so hard to get you over for dinner," she giggles. "Felt too big to just tell you via text."
My throat tightens. The room feels too small. Too hot. I want to be happy for them. At least, for Sera, who's never done anything to me.
And yet...
I push back from the table. "Excuse me. I need some air."
"Gemma—" Adrian starts.
But I'm already walking. Out of the dining room. Through the foyer. Out the front door.
I make it to the side of the house before I stop. I'm shaking. From the cold? From the ghosts of this house?
Who fucking knows.
I certainly don't.
For months, I've been trying to conceive, half dreading the moment I do, and no matter how I feel about having a child, I can't stop the sting that comes from failure.
I'm useless. Saint knew it. It's why he made life miserable during our engagement. He didn't want to be tied to me, and maybe he was right.
Because I can't give him what he needs more than anything—an heir.
"Gemma."
Saint's voice. I didn't hear him approach, too wrapped up in my thoughts.
"Please, go." I manage. I don't want him to see me like this. I wipe my face, not sure when the tears started.
His thumb reaches out and rubs a tear from my cheek. He brings his thumb to his lips and sucks the moisture from his skin. It would feel very erotic if the circumstances were different.
"Do you want to remind me how fucking useless I am, Saint?" I push him away from me, but he doesn't move. "The perfect little princess who can't produce an heir." I point at the windows of the house. "Meanwhile, Sera gets pregnant after one go, and now..."
I inhale sharply, trying to gain some semblance of control.
Saint's jaw tightens. "Come here."
"No." I push him away, but this time he doesn't allow it.
He pulls me into his arms anyway. And I fight it for exactly three seconds before collapsing against him.
I don't cry. I'm too angry to cry. Too frustrated. Too everything.
I just stand there, shaking, while he holds me.
"You're not broken," he says finally. His voice is quieter than I've ever heard it.
"Yes, I am. Five months, Saint. Five fucking months."
"That's not unusual."
"We fuck like rabbits," I remind him. "And we aren't careful. It should have happened by now."
"Could be my fault," he says, shrugging. "Slow swimmers."
"No one thinks that."
He snorts. "It's no one's fault except for all the people fucking pressuring us." He lets go of me and runs a hand through his hair. "I'm a fucking psychopath, but even I don't think we should just be bringing kids into this fucked up shit."
His venom catches me off guard.