CHAPTER EIGHT
Take it like it’s yours.
To say Benny was distracted was the understatement of the century. Less than twenty-four hours ago he’d taken his ex-girlfriend up against a wall and now, here he was, in his friend’s backyard, pretending his head wasn’t fucked while everyone around him celebrated.
“Crazy shit, right?” Zach saddled up beside him, beer in hand as he nodded over at the happy couple.
The happy couple were Cat and Cody, who had just announced they were pregnant. They already had a ten-year-old son together, and despite not being his biological mom, Cat, had quickly claimed Dylan as her own.
All the gang were here today. His friend Hunter and his wife Rachel. Luke and his girlfriend Bella. Wade, who was one of Zach’s brothers, and his girlfriend Riley. Then there were Zach’s other brothers, Matt and Jonah who helped Wade run the Evans ranch.
The baby news wasn’t a shock, not really. Cat loved being a mom and never hid the fact she wanted a house full of children. Benny was happy for them. Despite what his face probably looked like.
“You good?” Zach asked when he didn’t reply.
He wasn’t good. He was going out of his mind. Which is likely why he opened his big mouth.
“I slept with Bethany,” he blurted.
“Today?”
“What? No! Last night. It happened last night.”
“And that’s better?” Zach joked. Benny glared. Unimpressed at the huge grin on his friend’s face. “Man, for someone who just got laid—”
“Don’t say it,” he warned.
Zach held up his hands in surrender. “Okay, okay. All I’m trying to say is I’m surprised. That’s all. I thought you’d be much happier when the time finally came.”
When the time finally came? What was he talking about? Which is exactly what he asked him next.
Zach offered a nonchalant shrug. “We all knew it was only a matter of time.”
They all knew? “Don’t tell me you assholes had bets on this shit? ‘Cause that’s messed up!”
“Hey, chill.” Zach put away his dimples and turned more serious.
“Of course, we didn’t have bets on this.
We just know you, man. We were there when you got that wedding invite.
We were there when you beat the shit out of the punch bag at the gym after.
And we were there biting our tongues when we found out she ended up back at your place the night of her wedding.
We’re not stupid, we know how you feel about the girl. ”
“You bit your tongues?” Benny raised a brow.
“Fine, some of us bit our tongues more than others.” Zach’s smile was back as he pushed floppy blond hair from his face.
It was hard to stay mad at Zach. Not when he knew just how much he cared about his friends and had no problem showing it. Luke was much easier to be pissed at. The sarcastic bastard. And Hunter, too. The big man may not talk much but when he did, he knew exactly what to say to hit a nerve.
Blowing out a long breath, Benny tried to remember what the point was of this sharing session.
Brain leakage?
Sounded about right. That and he was confused. Frustrated. And horny as hell. Which meant he needed advice. And out of all of his friends, Zach was the easiest to ask.
“I don’t know what she wants,” Benny admitted.
Zach nodded before asking, “Do you know what you want?”
Not having a frigging clue, Benny shook his head.
“So...the idea of you guys getting back together hasn’t crossed your mind?”
Benny’s jaw tightened at the question. Taking another swig of his beer, he attempted to control his heartrate.
It was only natural to think about ‘what if’ when an ex comes back into your life, right?
Because you’re such an expert?
He was starting to see the issue of nearing thirty-years old with only one real relationship under his belt.
The truth was, he had no idea what he was supposed to be feeling.
Was it normal to still consider Bethany his after all this time?
Because he did. Last night only solidified that feeling.
To him, taking her felt right. She belonged to him.
And he wanted to do it again. And again. And again.
Yeah, try explaining that to Zach without sounding like a deluded, possessive, sex-crazed asshole.
Instead, he went for a more watered-down version. “I don’t know if this is gonna make sense, but it feels like she never stopped being mine.”
Thankfully, Zach didn’t look shocked. If anything, he looked thoughtful as he nodded to himself.
“I get it.” Thank God someone does. “I felt that way with Libby...like she was mine, even when she wasn’t.
” Great, he wasn’t some kind of freak. Hallelujah.
“You want my advice?” The desperation must have been shining in Benny’s eyes because Zach continued without him having to say anything.
“Don’t fight it. Don’t run. Do what feels right for you and I promise. ..things will fall into place.”
“You sound like a fucking fortune cookie, dude. Speak English.”
The dimples were back out. “Okay, let’s just say, if you just so happen to end up with Bethany in your bed again, just go with it. Don’t get caught up in the details of what’s going to happen next. Lean into it. See where it goes.”
Okay. This was advice he could get behind. No overthinking. Bethany in his bed again. He didn’t know what he liked more.
Who the fuck are you kidding?
Fine. Maybe it wasn’t so hard to choose.
Not after what they did and how damn good it felt.
So good that he was worried she’d already well and truly ruined him for any other woman.
Despite that extremely alarming side effect, the idea of doing what they did last night again was enough to get his blood heating and his mood brightening.
Lean into it...see where it goes.
How hard could it be?
“Theres something else,” Benny announced, his stomach already somersaulting. “Last night, well, last night, she found out the real reason I broke up with her.”
He’d never told anyone. His friends knew about his mom’s cancer. Although they’d learned about the first time she was diagnosed much later as he’d joined the fire department only a few months into her treatment and hadn’t exactly felt like sharing with his new colleagues.
“Shit, man. I just assumed she broke up with you.” Zach was trying his best to hide his smile. It wasn’t working. Fucker.
His friend was treated to a whack on the arm. “Thanks, asshole.”
“Hey, you’re the one acting all lovesick. I just assumed. We all did. So...you gonna put me out of my misery? Why did you break up with her?”
“Between us?” Zach lifted his chin in acknowledgement, his stare back to serious in the blink of an eye. “My mom’s first diagnosis was a few weeks before I was set to follow her to Denver. And I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t leave my mom.”
“And you never told her why?” Zach looked suitably horrified, only making him feel guiltier when he shook his head in reply. “Jesus, man.”
It was a minute before his friend spoke again, and when he did, he knew what was coming.
“That is the one thing you will have to talk about, you know that, right? She deserves to have that talk.”
He was right. She did deserve it. He just had no idea how he could possibly justify not telling her.
“I know. Shit. I know.”
***
Benny’s hand on the laminate door stilled. Taking a moment, he drew in a deep breath.
What’s the plan, again?
He’d woken up determined. Fire in his belly. With a mission to complete. But now, now he was questioning himself. Having second thoughts.
I’m gonna fuck this up.
It had been two days since Cat and Cody’s celebration, and Zach’s advice was still fresh in his mind.
Combine his friend’s words with the fact Benny was still unable to think of anything else, and the desperation to see Bethany again was almost unbearable.
Which was how he found himself at the Goldacre Medical Clinic, making an appointment under Hunter’s name.
You can do this. Stick to the plan.
There wasn’t really a plan per se. He’d decided this morning to focus specifically on Zach’s idea to go with the flow.
Not that making an appointment to see Bethany under his friend’s name was very ‘go with the flow’, it wasn’t, but it was either this or get ghosted again.
And being ghosted really freaking sucked.
So, there he was, pushing open the door and taking an apprehensive step into the sleek and incredibly shiny consultation room.
Bethany’s eyes went comically wide at the sight of him. “What are you—”
Knowing exactly what she was going to say, he quickly interjected. “We need to talk.”
At his announcement, he didn’t miss her slowly backing up against the gray wall behind her.
It was her outfit, though, that had him doing a double take.
Sexy white lab coat. Figure hugging black dress that went all the way down to her knees.
Not so sensible black heels. And a damn stethoscope draped around her neck, taunting him.
Because yes, he was weak, and his schoolboy brain was already conjuring up X-rated fantasies of them playing doctor.
Yes, please.
“Please tell me Hunter Campbell is sitting out there, waiting for his appointment, and you didn’t just commit insurance fraud so you could come in here and tell me we need to talk?”
Well, when she put it like that? Shit.
“Oh my God!” She stomped when he didn’t answer quick enough. “What the fucking, fuck, Benny?”
She was no longer backing up. She was rounding her desk, untangling her stethoscope and flinging it over her shoulder as she marched toward him.
“Is that the language you use with all your patients, doctor?” He couldn’t help himself. Clearly.
A cute growl escaped her lips as she slammed the door shut behind him, quickly spinning back around to face him.
“You’re unbelievable, Benny.”
“Unbelievable?” he repeated, a smug smirk forming.
He shouldn’t be enjoying this. Shouldn’t be so turned on.
But he was. “Funny, I seem to recall you saying the same thing to me the other night. When I had your legs shaking so hard you were scared you couldn’t stand up. ” Like a douche, he added a wink.
You’re going to hell.
“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Narrowed eyes cut to him.
He took a step forward. Admiring Bethany’s sexy scowl. Not missing the heat darkening her gaze. She looked torn between kissing him and killing him. So, he made the choice for her, closing the distance between them before she could decide.
Benny’s hand went to her waist as he hauled her close, his mouth slamming down onto hers as he worked to pry sugary pink lips apart. It didn’t take long. On a gasp, she melted into his touch, teasing his tongue with tentative swipes of her own. She tasted like caramel coffee. Fucking delicious.
Backing her up to the nearest wall, it was only when she was trembling that he suddenly remembered the other thing he came here to do, and momentarily broke their kiss. His mouth still brushing hers as he made his demand through heavy breaths.
“You’re going back to the support group. This week.”
“Okay. Yes,” she readily agreed. Impatiently taking his mouth again, her hands wrapping around his neck as she tugged him closer.
That was easier than he thought. She really did want this as much as he did. That thought alone made his blood heat further, driving him deeper into her.
The feel of her supple body pressing into him had his hands moving. One skimming over the swell of her chest, pausing just long enough to feel her nipple tighten beneath his touch. The other trailed over silky curves, dipping lower until he found her ass, where he took a firm and greedy handful.
Goddamn beautiful.
He needed more. He needed her dress off and her legs spread. He wanted to taste her creamy skin as his fingers worked her. Until she was slick. Ready. And desperate.
With a new mission in mind, he shifted his hands, this time he was searching for a zipper. A way in. But he came up short.
Damnit.
Releasing her plump lips, he spoke into her again. “You’ve got three seconds to get your perfect ass out of this dress, or I’m ripping it.”
He was gifted with a sultry, lopsided smile, her eyes glossy as her lab coat slid to the floor. Easing back, she reached behind, her fingers quick to find the cleverly hidden zipper. More fabric pooled at her feet as he took the sight of her in and worked his newly tightened throat.
Black lace barely contained her curves, sky high-heels making her legs look even longer. But it was her face that did it. Broke any control he had left. Swollen, wet lips pushing out broken breaths as dark green eyes heated.
“Your turn,” she challenged.
His shirt was over his head a second later, smug satisfaction warming his chest as more fire sparked in her eyes. Once he’d kicked off his boots, his jeans were next to go, then his boxers.
As tempting as it was to take her right then and there, he wasn’t going to.
Not yet. He’d already had her against a wall.
Rough, how they both liked it. But today?
Today he wanted something else. He wanted to take his time.
They had some catching up to do that involved dragging his mouth over every inch of her.
He wanted her to shake. Plead. Writhe. Only then would he take what was his.
Dropping to his knees, he threw one leg over his shoulder, his mouth going straight to her center.
Moments later, his tongue was eagerly taking its first swipe of sweetness.
Ignoring Bethany’s muffled gasp, a smile tugged at his lips as he felt her back hit the wall and her body arch.
It was when her hands laced through his hair, though, that he lost it.
His grip on her thighs tightened, his leisurely strokes quickly becoming hungrier.
Ten long years he’d been starved. He was going to take every drop she gave him.
And that’s what he did. His mouth relentless as he felt her body ripple and buck.
She was chasing every flick of his tongue, cursing his name while begging for more.
This was the Bethany he remembered. Wild. Free. Mine.