Chapter 5 #4
A few days had passed since our fight and I was holding out on Jahrein.
He was like a sex fiend and wanted it all the time, so he was going crazy.
I was trying my best to show him that this wasn’t Burger King and he couldn’t always have it his way.
Now, I loved fucking him probably just as much as he enjoyed me, but I had better restraint.
Besides that, I couldn’t find my birth control pills anywhere, so I wasn’t trying to do anything until I found them.
Something inside told me that Jahrein was behind the disappearance of my pills, but I didn’t understand why.
I just knew that he wasn’t trying to have another baby. That would be just crazy.
“Come on, baby.” Jahrein pleaded as he pried himself between my thighs.
“Jahrein, move.” I gritted. It was three in the morning and he refused to let me sleep.
“Just, just, just kiss me.” he mumbled as he smothered me with his mouth.
“Um umm.” I shook my head as he pushed his tongue in my mouth. He kissed me long and deep and I fought against him the entire time. I think that my resistance was turning him on even more.
I could feel him pulling my panties aside and trying his best to penetrate me. That’s when I finally broke away from the kiss.
“Jah, I already told you not to do that.”
“Man, how are you going to tell me what to do with my pussy?”
“Your pussy? Nigga please, you need to move.”
He ignored me and began pushing his way inside of me. I was moving all kinds of ways to stop him. “Jahrein, nooo. At least put on a condom. I haven’t taken my birth control lately.”
He stopped and stared at me through the darkness. “A condom? Girl, you got me fucked up. I aint using no damn condom with you and I don’t have none no way.”
“You better go get one if you want to fuck me.”
He sucked his teeth and then plunged deeply inside of me. He pinned my hands down as our mouths met again. He was fucking me extremely hard and breathing heavily. I hate to admit it, but I was already on the verge of cumming.
Jahrein lifted his head. “See, I knew your ass was fronting. You know you love this dick. You like it when I take what’s mine, don’t you? Look at you fucking me back.”
“So. I know you better pull out.” I moaned.
He pounded my walls as I gripped the sheets. The harder he pumped the more I could feel his dick jerking. That muthafucka was cumming inside of me.
“Jahrein, I told you not to do that. You was supposed to pull out.” I whined as he grinded into me.
“That’s where it’s supposed to go.” he sighed as he laid his chest on mine, completely out of breath. “You know that.”
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Me, Jahrein, and Jahrein Jr. were all riding in his Cutlass headed to the clinic.
He'd just bought the car a few months ago. It was time for me to have a check-up and re-up on my birth control prescription. Ever since I'd had Junior I'd been keeping and making my own appointments. In fact, I handled all of my business either alone or with Jah. I can’t lie; he was usually there for the important shit, unlike so many of my friends’ babies’ daddies.
When we pulled up to the building I hopped out the car, leaving Jah to get the baby and all of his things. They were dressed alike with the same white Ralph Lauren Polo shirt, jeans, and Jordans. They were adorable and looked so cute together.
Somehow they still ended up ahead of me, so Jah held the door open for me. The clinic was crowded as usual. I signed in and then we took a seat. I noticed a lot of lonely chicks staring Jah down. He pretended to be engrossed into our son, but I knew that he noticed too.
I was never threatened by the attention that Jah received. Hell, I got twice as much. I think that’s why we both had problems trusting each other. We were quite an attractive couple. Our son couldn’t help but be handsome. It was in his genes.
That day I had my hair down and wore a part down the middle.
I was wearing some Ralph Lauren jeans and a tight Ralph Lauren t-shirt with some Air Max.
There were a few niggas in there and all their eyes seemed to be on me.
Some dude even referred to me as a Pocahontas and another called me the Stacy Dash look-a-like, while whispering to their friends, but pointing at me.
Jah picked up on that shit immediately, and started mean mugging the dudes.
Then he put his hand on my thigh, I guess to stake his claim.
Finally, the doctor called my name. Of course, Jahrein invited himself along. The doctor asked me the same routine questions then took some blood. Then I waited for my pap smear.
Jahrein played with Junior, while I stared at the ceiling. I was ready to get that shit over with. I hated to have some stranger digging in my coochie and so did Jah. That’s why he never missed any of my appointments.
The doctor performed the pap smear and it seemed as though he took longer than usual.
Afterwards we sat in the waiting room as instructed.
I didn’t know why we were waiting, because usually he would give me my birth control prescription and then I was on my way.
All kinds of thoughts were racing through my mind.
“Bitch, if you gave me something I’m gonna kill you.” I whispered harshly.
He looked at me like I was crazy. “What? Girl, I aint been doing shit.” he claimed. I couldn’t tell if he was telling the truth or not.
“Raven Torrance.” some Asian lady called out. Me and my little family rose up. The lady guided us to this small office.
“Well, Ms. Torrance, we called you back here to inform you guys about some things.”
“Okay.” I nodded, nervously.
“Well, according to your urine sample you’re pregnant.” the lady reported, causing my whole world to come crashing down.
“I’m what?” I asked her. I had to have heard her wrong.
“You’re pregnant.” she repeated.
“But I’m on birth control.”
“Yes, you were, but obviously you weren’t using them properly. But even if you did, they aren’t a hundred percent proof.”
“Do you know how far along she is?” Jahrein asked her with what seemed to be a smile.
“No, that’s something that’s she’s going to have to find out from her physician.” she explained.
I left out of that clinic in a daze. I tried to be careful. I really did. I was not trying to be one of those girls. I loved my baby, but he was an accident, and I was planning to do some things before having any more kids. I didn’t know what to do. How was I going to tell my family this?
Jahrein put the baby in his car seat, as I slid in the front seat. By the time he was getting in, my face was soaked with tears.
“What you crying for?” he asked.
“Because, I don’t need any more kids right now.” my lips trembled.
“Man, quit that, Raven.” He pulled me into his arms. “It is what it is. I got y’all.
We gon be alright. You know that I’m a take care of mine.
Stop acting like it’s the end of the world.
I know you worried about what people gon say, but the only thing that matters is us.
” He took a deep breath. “If you want to, we can hold off from telling anybody for a while.”
“Whatever.” I rolled my eyes. I could tell that this was exactly what he wanted.
“Girl, go ‘head with that. I love you.” he professed, as he kissed me. That kiss made me feel much better. I have to admit that it didn’t take much for Jahrein to make me smile.
“Giving me another baby can never be a bad thing.” He maintained, as he cranked the engine of his car. He backed out of the lot, before turning up the volume on the radio. “Uh oh, Raven. This your song right here, aint it?” he bobbed his head.
“Well what will this lead to? Will it be just me and you? Tell me. You know I want you. Tell me how you feel. I’ll be obliged if you step outside because my ride is awaiting…
.You came stronger, I lasted longer than I ever lasted your mouth was fantastic…
” The radio blasted Eight Ball and MJG’s Space Age Pimpin’.
I couldn’t help but smile. That was indeed my song.
Jahrein continued to bob his head. “Yeah, that’s my baby’s shit right here.
Me you. You and I. Situation getting sticky.
Your mouth is saying no but your body is saying stick me.
Lick me. Don’t be afraid of what your friends say.
Rappers get that ass then be out of here like yesterday.
But not tonight…I hear your patnahs dissing when they thank I aint listening.
Them hoes just be wishing they could be in yo position.
” he rapped to me, as he gently stroked my chin.
“Stop.” I giggled.
“Aw, you know you like that shit. Aint that right, lil’ man?” he asked as he looked back at Junior. He gave his daddy a huge mostly toothless grin.
I shook my head, knowing that I was about to give in. That was my song. I looked back at my baby. “Lil’ Jahrein, that’s funny to you? New day, new age. Every once in a while this is how we play our game.” I sung to him and he cracked up, leaning his head back, and clapping his little hands.
“That's what I wanna see. Smile for me, mama.” he cooed, as he gently stroked my face. “No matter what, I'ma hold it down for you. I promise.”
That day we just drove around as a family and talked.
He told me that he loved me with all of his heart and that he was overjoyed that we had created another life together.
I was still a bit shaken, but his calmness put me at ease.
I decided that as long as he was confident that everything would be fine, then I should feel the same way.