Chapter 8
(You must Love Me/ Jay-Z and Kelly Price)
“Strapped her body with them thangs… as you boarded the plane couldn’t explain the strange feeling that I caught in the veins…”
Man, life in the projects was like no other.
I had been raised up in the ghetto all my life, but my mama had steered away from apartment complexes that were piled up to the ceilings with ghetto ass people.
A young girl with no parental guidance living in the projects was a disaster waiting to happen.
Initially, I was mingling with the chicks from around the way on a business level. Then I figured that if I sold clothes to them then I could chill with them too. That was the dumbest thought I ever had.
At first the women around the way would meet me at the door with their money and then I’d give them their merchandise. But then I had to switch it up. My neighbors were nosy as hell, and I wanted to keep them out of my business. So, I started conducting my business inside our apartment.
The different broads were all in awe at how me and Jahrein were living.
Everybody knew our ages and figured that we should’ve been living like the rest of the young couples around there.
Most of the young chicks that lived in the Cunney Homes barely had a bed to sleep in or a couch to sit on.
But our shit was laid and well-kept at all times.
Every time I had a chance, I was buying something new for the house.
Once the females saw that I was living alright then they started with the questions about Jahrein.
They wanted to know where was he from. Where did he hustle.
Did he buy that for me or did I steal it.
I never really had too many answers for them and I guess that that made them even more curious.
Every time I looked up there was a hood rat in his face.
I aint no insecure girl, so I never came out a bag on those hoes.
But they were becoming bolder by the day.
Jahrein was always in and out, so I needed something to preoccupy my time.
I started hanging outside more and chopping it up with the local hood rats.
I would mainly sit out on my stoop and let my kids play with their power wheels and watch all the action going down.
Every now and then somebody would come by and smoke a blunt with me.
Shell would even come through from time to time.
For the first time in a long time she couldn’t come over with gossip about Jahrein.
We weren’t in their hood anymore, and he wasn’t out hanging unless it was about money.
More and more Jahrein’s name was ringing in the streets.
He kept real late hours, but not once did I complain.
I knew that he was doing what he had to do.
I saw something different in his hustle that separated him from the rest of the dudes his age.
It took me a minute to realize it, but Jah hadn’t bought himself a pair of shoes in months and I had to remind him to get a haircut.
While he was on that paper chase nothing else mattered, except maybe me and the kids.
No matter how late he’d come in, I’d always sit and wait up for him.
He would come home exhausted and would just hold me.
Right before he’d fall asleep he’d tell me about the plans he had for us in the future.
He kept reminding me that I was better than what surrounded us, and that I didn’t have any friends in this life.
He and my two kids were the only people that I should care about in the end, because they were the ones that were going to have my back when the shit really counted.
I knew that he was trying to school me on the low.
He was usually more hands on with me, but since he couldn’t be there like he used to he felt that he needed to drop some jewels.
And warn me about the company that I was keeping.
Things with Jahrein were changing over time.
He was no longer so tight-fisted with the money he gave me.
I didn’t have to thoroughly explain why I needed anything.
I’d say that I wanted something and then I had it.
Simple as that. After a while there wasn’t any real reason for me to keep stealing, so I eased up on that.
When I wanted my hair done, I went to the salon.
When I wanted the newest Jordans, I went to the mall.
And anything that I thought that the kids might like was theirs.
The chicks in the projects picked up on Jahrein’s generosity too.
Bitches were keeping up with what new bag I had or what new piece of jewelry I was wearing.
I wasn’t bothered by all the gossip, because I honestly didn’t think twice about those broads in my complex.
There was no competition. Most chicks my age was already having babies, didn’t go to school anymore, and just plain didn’t have a fucking clue.
No bitch had it in them to run a mile in my shoes, oh but they still tried. They tried like hell.
Bitches were bold as fuck in the projects.
I’d find notes on Jahrein’s windshield. Numbers would magically appear in the tray where he’d roll his blunts.
Like I said I wasn’t worried about any of those bitches, but one hoe in particular was taking shit too damn far.
It wasn’t about Jahrein, but her lack of respect for me.
I’d walk out my door and catch Carmilla’s ass bent all in his car window talking to him.
The first time I saw that shit I nipped it in the bud.
I told her that I’d appreciate it if she stayed out his face, and I told Jahrein to keep her out his face.
I thought that we’d all reached an understanding, until I pulled up to the corner store one day and caught the bitch holding my daughter in her arms. Jahrein claimed that they ran into each other, and she asked to hold Jhyrah.
But none of that mattered as I slapped the hell out of him and then hit her with a two piece.
She dropped to the ground, and that was her biggest mistake, because I stomped her until I got tired.
Being that we were in the hood no one even tried to stop me, and Jahrein’s messy ass just held the baby while I did my thang.
He was even on the sidelines coaching me.
When we made it home he went off about me putting my hands on him in public, but I wasn’t trying to hear that shit.
No nigga in the neighborhood could touch our kids and everybody knew that, so letting nasty bitches touch them should have been out the question as well.
I couldn’t even hold a conversation with the dudes around there without there being a problem.
He would go so far as to stop me right in my tracks and make me go in the house before he’d let me continue talking to another nigga.
He claimed to know how other men thought, and once I started being friendly with them they’d feel comfortable enough to take shit further.
That’s probably how he did shit, so he was putting it off on all the other niggas.
Me and Jahrein had a huge debate about him letting that girl hold my baby.
He was still saying that he didn’t see anything wrong with it, so I decided to show his ass.
I waited a couple of days and made him think that I’d forgotten about the incident.
I went to the grocery store and came back with a shit load of food.
I knew that the niggas would be out that time of day, so that’s when I decided to strike.
I pretended to struggle with the bags, until this cute dude volunteered to help.
I told him that I had the bags but he could get my son out the car.
I knew that Jahrein was home because his car was parked outside.
So, I led the way as the dude carried a sleeping Junior.
When Jahrein saw that man holding his son he damn near flipped out right then and there.
He snatched Junior out of the guy’s arms and then told him that he could bounce.
We argued all day over that situation, but I bet you that he never let another girl hold my kids.
He was a nigga with all types of double standards but I had a remedy for it all; just give him a dose of his own medicine.
Of course, doing that always led to a dispute, but it would put him in line.
And made him think twice about openly doing something that he didn’t want me doing.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
“Damn, mami, let me get a minute.”
I twirled around and spotted Jose. He was a fine ass Colombian nigga that bitches was constantly yapping about. He was a cutie with curly hair and fair skin. Personally, he was too light for me. I liked my men light-brown, not high yellow.
My neighbor Tiff was standing beside me.
She was a little rough around the edges, but I fucked with her.
She was one of the few broads in the complex that never pried into my business, and she'd actually listen to me when I needed to vent.
Her man was this infamous jack-boy that had plenty of niggas shook in the hood.
“Jose, why you trying to flirt wit my girl?” she asked in her raspy voice. She was light-skinned and slim, but had a hard exterior.
I shook my head, wanting to nip that shit in the bud. Jahrein was a muthafuckin' fool, and the last thing I needed was him tripping with me. “He aint flirting with me.”
“Yeah, I am.” he spoke in his heavy accent.
I rolled my eyes, as I attempted to step towards the complex. We had only walked to the store to get some fresh air. I didn't have time to entertain no thirsty niggas.
“Mami, hold up.” Jose called out, as he hurried up to me. He grabbed my hand, as his eyes visually raped me. I quickly pulled away. “I can't get to know you?”
I shook my head. “I can't.”
“Why not? I'm ugly to you or something?”
I giggled. “Naw. I got a man.”
“A man? What that got to do wit me?”
I frowned. “Everything. I don't get down like that.”