Chapter 11 #4
“And this is why! I never even get time in between babies. By the time one is walking, I’m pregnant again.”
“So, what’s wrong with that? Don’t you have everything that you need? What’s so bad about staying at home and giving your husband babies?”
“So, why am I even in college, if all I have to look forward to is being the mother of your kids?” I snapped.
“Because it preoccupies your time. Then you can tell our daughter how you got a degree and shit.”
“So what, my hard work and efforts is all for show?” I asked as I folded my arms across my breasts.
“Naw, it’s for your own satisfaction. I don’t know why you’re tripping. We are young. You can use your degree after the kids get older and move out.”
“What? So, you don’t expect me to work until then?” I asked in disbelief.
“I mean…no. That’s the plan aint it? You don’t need a job. I take care of you.”
“You know what; I got a resolution for this shit. Your ass is just going to start wearing condoms after this baby.”
“You got me fucked up. I aint wearing no condom with my wife. God said be fruitful.” He laughed.
Jahrein was one prehistoric chauvinist pig.
He really did want me barefoot and pregnant.
I was in a losing battle, so I gave up. Even as I tried to explain this to friends and family they didn’t see anything wrong with his demands.
They all felt that there were far worse things that a man could demand, and that I should happily oblige.
People had long ago stopped seeing me as a teenage girl, but that was exactly who I was.
I was also a mother and a wife, but I didn’t want that to define me.
Michelle had a two year old daughter, but at least she was twenty.
So, she’d experienced some things before she had a child.
Shit, as soon as I started smelling myself I became with child.
I didn’t know shit about dating or being young and care free.
My life had stopped being mine a long time ago.
Eventually, I decided to not cry over spilled milk and embrace the pregnancy. Hell, I wasn’t even old enough to get my tubes tied. Lord knows how many I’d have by the time I reached twenty-one.
I continued to go on outings with my girls and things like that. Until, once again, I ran into Khalil.
This time I had a different attitude about seeing him. I didn’t have shit to say to him. Me, Michelle, and Joy were all eating at the Aquarium, which was an overpriced restaurant with live fish swimming around.
“Raven, do you know the guy sitting to the left of us?” Joy asked me.
“Who?” I asked as I turned in that direction. I spotted Khalil smiling right at me. “Oh, him. He’s nobody.” I sighed.
“Nobody? Girl, that’s Khalil. That nigga got long paper.” Michelle stressed.
“So I’ve heard. I know him but I aint speaking to his ass.” I rolled my eyes.
“Why not?” Joy asked.
“Because his ass is up to no good.”
“Okaay. Oh…I forgot who I was talking to. You don’t want any problems with Jahrein, huh?” Michelle laughed.
“This is not about him.” I shook my head.
“Well, I can’t even front. You are my hero. You’re the only completely faithful chick that I know.” Michelle giggled like I was some kind of joke.
“No, she’s silly.” Joy waved Michelle off.
“But seriously, Raven, I’ve never met anyone like you.
I got to give it to you, you’re a bad bitch.
I mean, you really have the overall package and it seems like you don’t even know it.
Most women with the body and face like yours have their heads so far up their asses that it aint even funny.
But you, it’s like shit doesn’t even matter.
Men always stare, and you pay them no mind.
Personally, I don’t know how you ignore that temptation. ”
“She doesn’t ignore it all. I’ve caught her skinning and grinning at a few dudes.” Michelle laughed.
I had to laugh too. I’d been holding a secret in for years and I needed to tell somebody. “Well, I’ve done my thing before.” I confessed.
“Yeah, right.” Michelle giggled.
“No, for real. Khalil showed me what the mouth be like and let him feel this hot box once.”
“Are you serious?” Michelle asked.
“Yeah.” I nodded.
“Bitch, you may not get around much, but you have one hell of a track record. Jahrein and Khalil?” Michelle gasped.
“What’s so unbelievable about that?”
“For you it’s not unbelievable, but you must not know what your man’s name means in these streets.
Bitch, so many hoes try to associate their name with him or his friends.
Then Khalil’s been in the game even longer.
All people sit around and talk about is what slab they pulled out for the car show or block party.
Both of them niggas is doing it. Shit, Lucky getting money, but not like that. ”
“I guess.” I rolled my eyes. It was amazing how ghetto people thought having a little change and a few cars meant “getting money”. “So, how many hoes have you heard claim my man?” I probed.
“Oh, shit.” Joy giggled, as she took a sip of her drink.
“Let’s leave that alone, Raven. I don’t want to be in your business or be the cause of some drama with you and Jahrein.” Michelle shook her head.
“No, I thought that we were girls? I’d tell you if I’d heard something about Lucky.”
Michelle sighed. “Okay, honestly I have heard about three different girls claim to be his woman on some level or another. Hell, when we first met I didn’t know that you knew him, so when I saw him bring you lunch one day I didn’t know what to say.
Then I found out that y’all were married and that changed my entire view on the situation.
I don’t like bringing back bones, especially to someone who has the level of commitment that y’all got.
But as we grow closer I would be wrong to keep that from you. ”
I nodded my head. I definitely understood her position.
I didn’t like hearing about the man I married fucking over me, but I knew the truth.
Jahrein did his thing in the streets and worked overtime to keep that separated from me.
He came home every night, was a great father, and kept me sexually satisfied.
So, I was thinking that maybe I could look past certain indiscretions, as long as he gave me what I needed.
I felt like I didn’t have many other options.
There I was pregnant with our fourth baby. Where could I go? What could I do?
“But that was he say she say, Raven. You are married and I wouldn’t run with rumors.
If you didn’t see it for your own two eyes I’d leave it alone.
Since I’ve known you I look at things a little different.
You may feel like you’re tied down, but there are women that would kill to be in your position.
You don’t have to work. You drive an Acura at eighteen, for God’s sake.
You have a beautiful home and even more beautiful children.
Jahrein gives you anything that you want, and I know that he loves you. ” Joy offered.
“That’s true, Raven. I wouldn’t go and flip out on him, either. All that I heard was hear say. But on the real, he loves your ass. Anybody could see that. I was just letting you know what was being said out here. Like you said, I’d want you to tell me.” Michelle added.
“Excuse me, would you guys like any dessert?” the waitress asked us.
“Um, we’d like the bill.” Joy told her.
“Oh, the gentleman over there has taken care of that. He also said that dessert is on him as well.” the waitress gestured towards Khalil.
“Ooh, tell him thanks.” Michelle smiled. “And I’ll have a strawberry cheese cake.”
“And I’ll have the same.” Joy laughed.
“Me too.” I sighed. Khalil was so damn pushy.
“Girl, why do you have that look on your face? You just got a free meal.” Joy asked me.
“How are y’all doing?” Khalil asked as he made his way over to our table.
“That’s why.” I mumbled.
“Raven, I been trying to catch up with you like forever.” he smiled revealing a gold grill with diamonds and baguettes.
“Oh, for real?” I sighed. I was wondering what he’d think once I stood up. From the position I was in he couldn’t see my small baby bump.
“Yeah, why don’t you ever call me?”
“Boy, I have so much to deal with. I just didn’t have the time. So, how is your and Melissa’s son?” I asked smartly.
He chuckled. “Oh, Lil’ Kay is good. He’s chilling at my mama’s right now. So, where are y’all headed after y’all leave here?”
“We’re going to Max’s.” Joy spoke up.
“Max’s, huh? What y’all know about that?” he asked us.
“Plenty.” Michelle sassed.
“Oh, okay. Is Lucky going to be there, Michelle?” Khalil asked her.
“No.” Michelle replied taking her tough attitude down a notch. Apparently, he’d hit a soft spot.
“Well, I was going there too. If y’all follow me, I could get chu in V.I.P.”
“Oh, hell yes!” Joy exclaimed.
“That’s a bet.” Michelle smiled.
I gave them both one ugly look. I didn’t want to go anywhere with that nigga.
“Are you coming, Raven?” he asked me.
“Oh, she’s coming.” Michelle answered for me. I was riding with her, so I guess she felt that I had no choice.
“Whatever.” I pouted. Yeah, I could’ve called Jahrein to come pick me up, but I wanted to go out, and why not spend Khalil’s money?
When I stood up to leave he saw my stomach. “I see he got you again.” he commented. I ignored his ass.
Max’s was jumping by the time we all arrived.
Since we were in V.I.P we didn’t have to stand in line.
It was all good especially since the club was supposed to be for twenty-one and up.
And I heard that they sometimes tripped about pregnant women coming into the club, so Khalil definitely came in handy.
I was feeling grown and sexy, even with my baby bump.
I had on a Coogi dress with some knee high boots.
The dress was very short just how I liked it.