Layla – Present
I waited until I got into town before texting Amie to see if I could come over. Half an hour has passed, and she still hasn’t replied. I lean my head back and sigh, I don’t want to go home.
I get out of the car and look at Mabel’s.
It’s a Tuesday night; she’ll be at the retirement home with Warren.
I decide to walk toward Harry’s. Tuesdays are two-for-one pizza night.
I usually work on Tuesday nights, and now, the one night I want to be there for the distraction, I’m stuck on the pier, wondering if I should go in or not.
I sit down on a bench, and lean my back against the wooden railing. I check my phone again. There’s a text from Dad that I ignore, and still no response from Amie.
“Layla?”
I look up from my phone to see Jacob, Keith, and three other men I’ve never seen before, each holding a stack of pizza boxes.
“Jacob.” I slip my phone into the pocket of my shorts and stand.
“Are you working tonight?” he asks.
“No.” I glance to Keith. His eyes are burning into mine, his jaw tight. “Just going for a walk.”
Jacob doesn’t look convinced, but he also can’t see the look Keith is giving me.
“Jacob,” Keith says. “We should get back to the office.”
“I’ll catch up with you.”
“We’ll try to save you some,” one of the men adds, “but you know Isaac and pizza…”
The other three men start walking away. Keith is still standing there.
“You should go,” I tell Jacob.
“She’s right,” Keith adds.
One of the guys shouts back for Keith to follow. He hesitates, casts one more look at Jacob, then reluctantly turns and walks off. Once they’re out of earshot, Jacob steps closer.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong. Really, you should go with them.” I put my hands into my pockets.
“Layla.” He says my name slowly. “Did something happen with Rhett again?”
I shake my head. “No.”
“You’d tell me though, right?”
I nod. I start walking, and he falls into step beside me. I stop again and sigh. Pushing my hair back out of my face, I glance over at him.
“My dad found the boxes.”
“How?”
“I guess he got fed up waiting for answers and decided to look for them instead.” I say, “He asked me if I cheated on Ben. We had an argument, so I left and came here.” I blow out a shaky breath.
“I was going to tell him, but… you know my dad. He’s…
” I pause and look at Jacob. “I just don’t want to be home right now. ”
“Okay,” he says. “Give me two seconds.”
He pulls his phone from his jacket pocket and walks a few feet away, pressing it to his ear. When he ends the call, he smiles at me.
“You hungry?”
I nod.
“Come on. I happen to know this really great pizza place. You might’ve heard of it.” He grins.
***
After we grab the pizza, we take Jacob’s truck to a quiet parking lot a few yards from the pier.
It’s a small sand covered lot, hidden between the dunes, overlooking the ocean.
It’s close enough to Harry’s that the lights from the pier reflect on the water, but far enough that most tourists don’t know it exists.
Apart from a few teenagers parked on the opposite side, it’s empty tonight.
We sit in the back of his pickup truck, the pizza boxes between us. I take another slice and look out at the lights dancing on the water.
Jacob removes the pineapple from his slice and sets it down on what I assume is my half.
At least I assume it’s mine. We haven’t discussed a formal slices to people ratio.
I probably shouldn’t have mentioned wanting to try Harry’s new dessert pizza.
If I hadn’t, maybe he would’ve ordered something he actually likes.
“Are you sure this is okay?” I ask for the tenth time.
“We get pizza every Tuesday night with some of our sub-contractors. They won’t miss me for one night.”
“What about Keith?”
I haven’t told Jacob what Keith said to me months ago. Keith had been there to pick up the pieces after I left, and I wish I could tell him how thankful I am that he did. Jacob deserves someone like Keith in his life. I don’t want to rock the boat more than I already clearly have.
Jacob’s eyes narrow, like he’s trying to figure out what I’m not saying. “Keith’s fine.”
I stay quiet.
He finishes peeling more pineapple from his slice and sets it on the piece closest to me. I pick that one up.
“Why are you asking about Keith?”
“No reason.” I take the largest bite I can and avoid eye contact.
“Layla?”
I sigh, then swallow. “He didn’t seem all that happy, that’s all. And I know he doesn’t like me.” Jacob opens his mouth to argue, so I cut him off. “Don’t. I know he doesn’t. And it’s okay. I get it. If I were Keith, I wouldn’t like me either.”
“It’s not that he doesn’t like you. He doesn’t like what happened. It’s not easy for him to let go. He made some choices back then I only recently found out about, and he knows I’m still annoyed.”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought up the letters, Jacob.”
“I’m glad you did.” He shifts closer. “You’re the last person I’d ever blame for what happened that night. It happened to both of us. And it wasn’t your fault. And it wasn’t mine.”
“I should have done more.”
He shakes his head. “There wasn’t much either of us had control over.”
“I wish I could go back and fix it all.”
His hand touches mine, just the faintest whisper of contact, before pulling away. “I know.”
We sit in silence, watching boats drift across the water.
It’s hard not to think about where we would be, or who we would be, if things had gone differently.
In high school, the teachers used to say the choices we made would matter for the rest of our lives.
I always thought it was dramatic. I know now it wasn’t.
What they didn’t say, though, is that the choices other people make would matter just as much.
That the things decided for us would carry just as much weight.
Weight that almost crushed us both. I toss my pizza crust into the box and lean back against the truck.
Above us, the stars are clear. I close my eyes and listen to the ocean.
“You know one thing I’ve never done?” I ask.
“What’s that?”
“Swim in the ocean at night.”
He laughs. “Are you planning on fixing that tonight?”
I shake my head. “No.”
“Why not?”
“I’m not prepared.”
“I think that’s supposed to be the point.”
I press my lips together. “Maybe.”
He reaches into his pocket and pulls out his wallet. “Heads or tails?”
I smile. “I forgot about this game.”
“Call it.”
“Heads. No wait, tails. Yeah, definitely tails.”
He flips the coin. I lean into see where it lands.
Tails.
I grin.
“I get the first question.” I tap my fingers along my knees. “Let me think…”
There are a few things I’d like to know. I’m not sure if they’re too heavy for tonight, so I start with something easy.
“How many girls have you dated?”
He looks uncomfortable as soon as I ask.
“Why do you want to know that?”
“Ah-ah, that’s not how this works,” I say, teasing. “You have to answer.”
He sighs. “I haven’t really dated.”
“Why did you say dated like that?”
“Like what?”
“You said it weird.”
“No, I didn’t.”
“Yes, you did. You said dated.” I do my best imitation of the way he said it.
He laughs. “I assumed you meant girlfriends.”
When I nod, he adds, “I haven’t had a girlfriend since…” he trails off, looking away.
“But you’ve been with girls.”
He rubs the back of his neck. “Yes. Now can we flip the coin again?”
I take the coin from his hand and flip it. When it lands on heads, he grins.
“My turn.” He leans back a little. “How many guys have you dated?”
I laugh. “Trying to even the playing field, are you?”
“It’s only fair.”
“Just Ben. There wasn’t anyone else.”
He flips the coin, heads.
“Do you miss Louisiana?”
“No. I miss Ben. Louisiana was never somewhere I liked. Not that it was bad… it just wasn’t here.”
I take the coin and flip it. It’s heads again.
I groan. “This isn’t fair.”
He laughs. “You made the rules, remember?”
“I’m going for a dare this time,” he says. “I dare you to get in the water.”
“No way.” I laugh.
He stands and jumps out of the truck bed, waiting at the bottom. He holds out his hand.
“Come on, Layla.”
I roll my eyes, then hop down to join him. He lets go of my hand the second I’m steady on my feet, and we run toward the water.
The waves splash against my ankles. The water has a chill to it tonight. I take a deep breath, and go for it.
It’s cold at first, but once I’m in, it gets a little warmer.
Or maybe I’m just getting used to it. Jacob makes his way beside me splashing up water toward my face.
I laugh as I splash him back. Our laughter eases and I lie back in the water, the stars stretch across the sky, I take in a deep breath then let my feet touch the sand beneath me.
I can feel his eyes on me without having to look.
“I have a confession.” I say.
“Yeah?”
“I’ve changed my mind about the dessert pizza.” I move my arms through the water, letting it ripple around me. “I want ice cream instead.”
He smiles, one corner of his mouth tugging up. “Then ice cream it is.”
***
Jacob takes me to a small ice cream shop that he says opened on Main Street about a year ago. We’re both still soaked, so he cranks the heat up high in the truck.
“Mabel’s shop used to be a café, didn’t it?” I ask.
He uses a little plastic spoon to scoop some ice cream from his paper tub and nods.
“Yeah. She said it closed down about six, maybe seven years ago.”
“It’s a shame,” I say, turning the spoon just before it hits my tongue. It would be perfect for a bakery. “Who runs the bank now?”
“Elinor. Why?”
“How much is Mabel going to want for it once it’s finished?”
He shrugs. “Depends on who wants to buy it.” He glances at me.
“Well…” I say, “I hope whoever does turns it into something nice.”
He nods, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips.
We finish our ice cream and move comfortably from conversation to conversation. Jacob tells me about work, and I tell him about Amie, and Harry’s, and everything that’s happened this week.
We don’t talk about Dad.
We don’t talk about the boxes.
We don’t talk about the hard stuff.
I like how, when I’m with Jacob, nothing feels forced.
I can breathe. I can just be Layla. Not someone who needs to be treated like I can break at any moment.
And if I do break, Jacob never makes me feel like it’s a problem.
He doesn’t treat me like I’m fragile. He makes me feel like I can do this whole living thing without completely falling apart.