Chapter 7
Chapter Seven
LUKE
I don’t know what the fuck to do. All I know is I don’t want to be at this festival and I sure as shit don’t want to be working the kids’ craft table with Saylor.
And I definitely don’t want to keep looking across the goddamn field and seeing Tyler laughing with my friends.
Not his, he left them all behind just like he did me.
I wish I could throw my hat on the fucking ground and hightail it out of here.
All I hear in my head is Saylor telling Tyler it was nothing last night on repeat as I try to help a five-year-old boy glue his snowman together. Of course, the glue isn’t sticking because it’s so fucking cold it hardens too quickly.
Finally, an hour later, we close down the craft table, so everyone can enjoy the festival. But I won’t be staying.
“I’m heading out. Anything else you need me to do before I leave?” I ask Saylor.
“Where are you going? I thought we could drink some spiked eggnog and maybe dance to the Christmas songs. Cuddle up by the big fire.” She elbows me.
“Want to sit on Santa’s lap? Tell him what you want for Christmas?
” She looks so cute, I want to bend down and kiss her.
But then her words ring through my head again like Christmas bells.
“Yeah, well, I’m not really in the mood to celebrate.” I head toward the parking area.
She huffs and jogs after me, stepping into my path. “What’s your deal? What’s going on with you?”
“Nothing.”
“I just… I feel like you’re mad at me.”
“I’m not.”
She tilts her head and steadies her gaze on me. “Talk to me.”
“It’s nothing, right? Just some grilled cheese and tomato soup.”
Just keep your mouth shut and get out of here.
Her head rocks back, and she blows out a long breath. “So you overheard us. Or he told you. Which one was it?”
“I came up on the tail end of the conversation.” My jaw twitches and my hands fist at my side.
“You didn’t show up for a while after he left.”
“I just went on a little walk around before I came back.” I move to step around her, but she steps in front of me again.
“And now you’re upset?”
I look around. I guess we’re doing this.
“Fuck yeah, I’m upset. God damn it, Saylor. I put myself out there.”
“You didn’t. You didn’t put yourself out there. We had sex. And yes, it was amazing, and I loved it, and I want to do more of it. I really like you.”
I run my hand through my hair. “I told how long I’ve wanted you, and you just toss away my confession, like you don’t even hold it close to you. Then you tell Tyler you’ll go get coffee with him.”
She groans. “I wasn’t actually going to go get coffee with him. I—”
“Then what? Why would you tell him you’re going to?”
“I just wanted him away from me. And the quickest way to get Tyler to go away is to agree to whatever he wants.”
I open my mouth to say something, but she continues, “I want you, Luke. And I don’t know how else to prove it to you. What do you want me to do? Strip myself down in the middle of the festival and have sex with you just to prove to Tyler—and this whole town—that I’m over him and I’m into you?”
I lift my hat off my head and push my hand through my hair. “Fuck. I’ve never felt insecure like this in my life. I’m not sure I’ll ever get over it. Last night, I thought I could. But the minute I see you with Tyler, the minute I see you guys talking, I automatically think you want him back.”
She steps closer, her hand finding mine at my side and she weaves her fingers through mine.
“I don’t want him back, Luke. I promise you.
I do not want the life I lived with him.
These past six months have given me clarity.
I’ve replayed all the bad things that didn’t work with us over and over in my head.
And the way he was with me… he treated me like I’d always just be there.
It was always what he wanted, and I was just an afterthought.
” She shakes her head, and her fingers tighten in mine.
“Honestly, Luke, I know I was blind to you for a long time, and I apologize for that. But I’m not blind now.
You’re all I see. I know this is new, and here we are having our first fight.
I don’t want Tyler to have that effect on us.
I want us to be a couple. I want us to go on dates, and I want to see what happens.
You’ve always been there for me, Luke. Always.
But that’s not why I want to be with you.
I want to be with you because of the way you make me feel.
Because of the man you’ve grown up to be.
Because just looking at you turns me on.
But more than that—I want to make you happy. I want to go on dates—”
“You said that already.”
A smirk forms on her lips. “I’m rambling because I’m trying to convince you that I want you.
I want us.” She presses her free hand to my chest. “I can’t take us back there.
If you’d ever told me your feelings back then, I don’t know what would’ve happened.
But I’m telling you right here and now—you’re the man I want. I want to give this a chance to grow.”
I pause, staring at her, wondering if I voice everything I’m feeling. A part of me thinks I shouldn’t—that it’s too soon and I’ll scare her off. But she needs to know the entire truth. “I’m gonna tell you something, and maybe it’ll scare you… I don’t want that, but you need to know.
“Luke—”
“I’ve loved you since we were teenagers.
” She swallows. “I was gonna approach you about it. We were friends, sure, but when we became teens, when the hormones hit, you were more than my friend. You were my crush. I was gonna tell you, but Tyler beat me to it. I should’ve said something.
I thought, of course, you’d want him over me.
I was an insecure fourteen-year-old boy.
Tyler stole attention from everything and everybody.
I’ve wanted you for a really long time, and I think that’s where all this insecurity comes from. I’m sorry I let it lead me tonight.”
I snatch her up by the waist and pull her into me, tucking the strands falling from her hat behind her ear.
“It’s always been you for me, Saylor. Always. And I don’t see that ever changing. So yeah, we can go on dates. I want that. But first, I’m going to ask you to be my girlfriend.”
“Oh my God, Luke. We just got together.”
“Is that a no?”
“It’s definitely not a no. I would love to be your girlfriend.”
My lips land on hers and I bring her body flush with mine. She opens for me, and our kiss deepens. I was so stupid for doubting her, and I promise myself that I’ll never do it again.
“Luke—”
“More,” I murmur, and crash my lips onto hers again.
Cheers erupt from around us and we both close the kiss to see the entire field of people, including Brooks and Lottie, cheering for us with big smiles on their faces.
I don’t bother looking to see where Tyler is.
Instead, I take Saylor’s hand in mine. “Let’s go, I have to tell Santa I want something else for Christmas. ”
She stops and looks up at me.
“I already got you.”
She rises on her tiptoes, presses her hand to my cheek and turns me to her, giving me a quick kiss. “So we both got our Christmas wishes early, huh?”
“Maybe we shouldn’t push our luck then. Want to go home and enjoy our Christmas presents?”
She bites down on her bottom lip. “Show me the way, Deputy Moore.”
That’s all I need to hear before I escort her out of the festival and into my truck.