Chapter 39
Chapter Thirty-Nine
KIT
A DECADE EARLIER…
T he evening didn’t go the way it should have. I was supposed to be laughing and dancing, my dress and makeup were supposed to be absolutely perfect. Tonight I was supposed to get the beautiful prince that swept me off my feet and showed me off to everyone we knew. That’s not what happened.
Mark Dixon was the most handsome boy I’d ever seen in real life. He was the kind of guy that made us all stop to watch when he walked down the hallway. He’d had that extra bit of magic that you knew would make him a star if he was given the chance to get on screen. I’d watched him like all the others and blushed when it seemed our eyes would meet randomly but that was it.
Mark was with Lisa. They were the couple of our high school. Almost like royalty, most definitely going to be prom King and Queen. But everything changed when Mark and Lisa broke up, with prom right around the corner.
“You’re beautiful, Kit. It’s easy to see why I’d want a special girl like you to go to prom with me.”
Mark made me feel beautiful. He’d said those words to me and I believed him. I wipe my tears and stare down at my hands. The hands that just fucking pushed Mark off his balcony two stories up. He almost made it into the pool but in the end he came up half a foot short.
“Oh god,” I whisper and it’s hard to stand upright, but I do it.
“Hurry the fuck up, Kit.”
My mom is here. I called her because I didn’t know what else to do. This night is a nightmare. I didn’t get to go to prom. Not a single soul saw me with Mark or even knew I was here with him. He’d made it that way. When he asked to take me to his house for drinks before prom as a way for us to relax together, I’d done it.
This was my first date and the idea of having drinks with Mark while I wore my fanciest dress seemed like a fairytale.
“Listen, I thought we would stop by my place and have a few drinks. Something for us to get the night started. It’s super nice. You’ll see.”
We’d met in the parking lot of the hotel the prom was being held at. I could see it in the background and could already hear the thumping music going on inside but it was early. Barely 6pm so I’d say yes and gotten in his car.
I wish I could take it back. I wish I could rewind everything and go back to that moment in the parking lot. If I could, I’d go into the hotel and I’d enjoy myself, even if I was alone. I would realize that I didn’t need a date to have a good time and I’d dance and laugh. Maybe I’d even meet a boy that really liked me. The kind that would actually take me out and dance with me in front of everyone and not an asshole like Mark Dixon.
We’d had a drink that had turned into two and then into three. It was after seven when I’d edged towards the door and asked him about us heading to the prom but he’d begged me to wait just a little bit longer. To have one more with him on the balcony.
“It has a great view. You’ll love seeing the stars.”
The view wasn’t of anything but Mark’s backyard and pool and hot tub combo. His family lived in a subdivision. It was nicer than where I lived but the houses were close together, every house built to the edge of the lots so the yards were too small for the builds. I could see into his neighbor’s yards. There wasn’t anyone outside right now with us and that was nice, because there were stars like Mark had promised and I was making the best of the situation and taking them in with the lukewarm beer I’d been nursing. I wasn’t a drinker, I never had been. After one beer that I drank too fast and felt tipsy on, I slowed down. Mark didn’t slow down, though. He kept drinking. He was on his fourth when he came up to me from behind and wrapped his arms around my waist while I stared up at the stars.
For a second I thought it was all coming together. Still a perfect dream that was just for me. That was before Mark tried to pull my skirt up.
“Stop.”
“Don’t be a tease, Kit.”
“Let’s go to the prom. Please.”
“In a minute.”
“Mark, stop.”
That had been when he’d pulled at my strap and it had torn. The dainty material hung down my arm and I fought back tears while Mark swore.
“Stop fucking crying. This is as good as a girl like you is going to get. You make me feel nice and maybe I’ll take you to that fucking prom for the last hour. You might even get lucky and I’ll let you suck me off at the afterparty.”
Maybe.
My heart broke. I knew he wasn’t going to. He’d never intended to. I was a maybe to him and I’d risked everything to be here.
“Get off of me!” I slammed my hands against his chest and he stumbled back a step. The beers he’d had were obvious as I surprised him. He wobbled and hit the railing but the surprise vanished in the next instant.
“You stupid bitch. I asked you out for one fucking reason and you can’t even do that.”
One fucking reason.
Tears welled in my eyes. I backed away. My heel caught on one of the balcony floorboards but I kept going. “I want to go home now.” I stepped into his room and kept walking, but I never made it past his bed.
“You’re not going anywhere until I get what I want. You’ve been fucking teasing me for weeks.” He grabbed me and spun me around to face him. “I’m getting what I want, you slut.”
I slapped him. I’d never raised a hand to anyone, not even when my mother took her frustrations out on me but I guess I am my mother’s daughter because the slap hit him square in the face. I gasped at the pain that shot up my arm but there wasn’t time to process what I’d done.
Mark grabbed my hair and threw me on the bed. “You think you’re going to hit me and get away with it? After I brought you here to my house? I should have fucked you in the car.”
Fear and adrenaline spiked, mingling in my blood and I prayed that it would end. That I’d wake up in my bed and this would be a nightmare. Mark was stronger than me but strength wasn’t everything. Not when desperation is in the mix. And I was desperate. I was desperate to get away and to go back to my room, back into my predictable routine where I wasn’t noticed by boys and things like this didn’t happen.
The world as it had been. The world where my mother was right. What was I thinking, that I got to have a fairytale night?
That wasn’t meant for me.
I should have known better.
I brought my knee up and slammed it into Mark’s balls as hard as I could. He fell off of me with a groan.
“Fucking cunt!”
I rolled off the bed and hit the floor so hard that I bit my tongue. Blood filled my mouth and I ran. I didn’t know where I was going, but the direction didn’t matter so long as I was moving. It was only when my heel hit the edge of the balcony and I almost went to the ground that I realized I hadn’t run towards the door.
When I turned around to make a run for his door, it was too late. Mark was there.
“You aren’t going anywhere, Kit. Get on your knees.”
“No, stay away from me.”
I backed away from him, hands shaking while the stupid stars I’d been gazing at just minutes before blazed overhead. Oh god, how was this happening? This couldn’t be real. Why was this happening?
“Let me go, Mark.”
He stepped out onto the balcony and the look in his eyes told me he wasn’t going to let me go. “Not before we have fun.”
“I’m not having fun. I want to go home!” I shouted the last word at him and when I saw his eyes go wide and he looked around like he was afraid someone heard, I knew what to do.
“Help me!” I screamed as loud as I could and Mark practically went purple. If I was loud enough, someone would hear me, even if they were inside. The houses were too close for someone not to hear me.
“Someone help me!” I stumbled back, playing for time because Mark was coming closer. A dog started barking next door and a light flashed on. I was going to get away from him. Someone was going to come look, that light was them, about to come to the door, I just had to stay away from Mark long enough for them to figure out where I was and what was happening.
I sucked in a deep breath to scream but Mark was faster. He lunged at me. “Shut up,” he hissed and wrapped his hands around my neck to choke me. I spluttered and twisted away from him but I couldn’t get free. I kicked his shins as hard as I could and Mark wobbled again. Maybe he’d had more than the four beers I’d watched him slam. He leaned close, hot breath against my cheeks and I smelled more than beer. It smelled like whiskey. I kicked him again and scratched his face.
“Fuck!” He jerked away but tried to keep hold of me. That’s when I threw myself forward. I had to get him off center to break his hold. We hit the banister with a crack and I slammed my hands against his chest as I threw myself backwards. Mark’s hold broke and I fell back onto the balcony with a cry. I’d hit my head and was too dazed to move.
Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up.
My brain screamed at me but it was tough to get my body to obey. I had to get away or Mark was going to find me. He was going to hurt me. I had to move. I had to. I forced my body to move and my legs obeyed but when I finally staggered to my feet, I realized something.
I was alone on the balcony.
The dog was still barking and the light was off now.
I opened my mouth to call to Mark but nothing came out. My throat hurt from Mark trying to choke me but I didn’t stop trying. “Mark?” I called out softly.
There was no answer. I took a step forward and then another until I was at the balcony and when I looked down it was Mark that I saw. His legs were bent at a weird angle and his head had cracked open from where he’d slammed into the concrete. Blood made a dark halo around him and I wasn’t sorry that he was dead.
“Good,” I whispered and then stepped away from the railing and headed to the living room. My phone was on the counter there. I had to call my mom. She would know what to do with his body. And I was right she had. We had Mark’s body in her car and were on the road in less than half an hour.
“Kit, what the fuck are you doing?” My mom snaps and it’s hard to breathe. She’s driving us out into the woods. “Are you listening to me?”
“What?” I swallow hard and then look over at her.
“Did anyone know you were going to the prom with him?”
“No,” I whisper. I hadn’t told anyone because it hadn’t felt real. Too delicate to say out loud because I was terrified of it falling apart before I got to enjoy it. A part of me was terrified that Mark and Lisa would get back together if she knew he was interested in me.
“I didn’t tell anyone,” I whisper.
“At least you did that right.” My mother speeds out of town and heads straight for the hills surrounding the town. There wasn’t much out here but there was a national forest. One that I’d spent time in as a kid for school trips but nothing much outside of that. I’d never been outdoorsy and my mother hadn’t wanted to spend the time to take me there like my friends’ families.
There was no camping trips or weekend hikes. But at least we had burying a body together.
“Grab the shovels and that rope,” My mother orders. “Start walking, don’t stop until I tell you.”
“What about Mark?”
“You mean the body of an almost rapist?” My mother grabs the rope she's wrapped around Mark’s feet and yanks him out of the trunk with two hard pulls until the body hits the ground with a sickening thud.
“You leave him to me. Just start walking.”
I do what she says and start walking up the steep trail she’d parked at. Behind me, the sound of Mark’s body being dragged is constant. The only pauses are when my mother swears and grunts, but every time I look behind me she yells at me.
“Keep fucking walking, little girl. I mean it.”
We walk for two hours before we find a place down in a ravine. “Start fucking digging. This has to be deep.”
We dig for twice as long as we walk and I’m standing at the bottom of the hole, sweaty and exhausted. Every minute feels like an hour. The only thought I have in my head is how is anything going to be the same? There is no way we are getting away with this.
Why didn’t we just go to the cops?
“What the fuck are you doing? That’s deep enough. Get out of there so I can throw this fucker in.”
“Sorry, mom.”
I climb out on my own and just manage to stand when my mom snaps her fingers at me. “What the fuck took you so long. Help me with this.”
This .
Not Mark. Just this.
I do as she asks and grab his feet. I’m still wearing my prom dress and heels. The ground is soft here and it’s hard to walk but we manage it. I don’t know how my mom dragged Mark for as long as she did.
Mark’s body goes over the edge and into the hole easier than I thought.
“Nobody is going to find him out here.” My mother tells me and slaps a shovel into my hand. She doesn’t have to tell me what to do. I know exactly what to do and get to work. The stars shine overhead and we bury Mark Dixon.