Chapter 1
DID YOU SEARCH FOR SMALL TOWNS TO LIVE IN WYOMING?
Dallas
“You know, I didn’t believe you when you said you were moving out of state,” Mitch says before taking a pull of his beer.
“Same,” Tyler adds. “I just thought it was some sick joke after that season-ending loss.”
Shaking my head, I huff out a laugh. “I’m still not sure how I feel about it, even after weeks of figuring out the details. But when April said she had this opportunity, I jumped on it too. I need the time away from San Francisco to get over my shit without everything hanging over my head.”
“I’ll be honest,” Mitch starts, pausing nervously as he looks down at his hands on the bar top.
“I felt like you jumped quickly into the coach position.” He looks up and holds his hands up in defense before even giving me a chance to say anything.
“Not that I didn’t think you were gonna kick ass at the job.
You just didn’t allow yourself enough time to get over what happened.
I know that had to be devastating for you. ”
“Agreed,” Tyler adds.
“If I were to lose baseball,” Mitch continues, “I would be a mess. Someone would have to pick me up out of bed every morning.” He laughs to lighten the mood.
I nod because he’s right. “I think losing baseball, or at least…losing the opportunity to play, just snowballed into everything else crashing down around me. I just needed something else to focus on when things with April…”
Mitch scoffs. “Let’s be honest, your marriage was never going to last regardless.”
“Agreed,” Tyler says.
“Then I was delusional to think things would look up with the head coaching position,” I continue, ignoring his comment about my failed marriage. “Only for that to also crash and burn.”
Mitch rolls his eyes. “That didn’t crash and burn. This is all only temporary, according to Clark. It will be good for you to get this time away.”
“Yes.” Tyler nods in agreement.
Mitch turns his chair to face him. “Are you just going to agree with everything I say and repeat after me?”
He nods and starts laughing. “You’re a wise old man, so I’m just being smart to agree.”
“Call me old one more time,” Mitch warns before relaxing in his chair. “I’m only two years older than you.”
While I may be their coach, these two have been my best friends since the beginning of my baseball career.
Mitch, Tyler, and I all attended the same high school in South Carolina and met at tryouts in junior year.
Tyler, a freshman at the time, asked if anyone had an extra glove because he’d forgotten his.
Mitch gave him one, and then we all fell into hysterics that this guy shows up to baseball tryouts without a glove.
We all made the team and have been inseparable since.
“Anyway…” Tyler ignores him and focuses his attention on me. “Did you find a place there?”
I shake my head over the brim of my beer bottle. “I’m not living in the city.”
“Where the hell are you going to live?” Tyler asks.
After losing that game and my conversations with Clark and April, I left the stadium feeling every emotion swarming me.
I held it in for Sage while I took her to get ice cream, but after that, I sat in my Tahoe in the parking lot of April’s apartment complex, staring through my front window until the street lights turned on, thinking about everything that led me to that moment.
Thinking about every reckless and impulsive decision I ever made without thinking things through.
The one constant good thing in my life is Sage. But I feel like I fuck that up more often than not, especially when it comes to being a good father to her.
I’ve never had the opportunity to fully be there for her the way I should’ve been as a dad.
I struggled with my erratic schedule, and my marriage ended because of all of it.
April hated that baseball always came first and that I couldn’t change the drive in me to be the best there was.
I was so caught up in my dreams that I never once realized how much it was affecting the people around me.
“I can’t go from living in one city to another,” I answer honestly. “I found a small town less than an hour from Cheyenne, where she’s going to be, called Bluestone Lakes.”
“That sounds…” Tyler starts.
“Oddly therapeutic,” Mitch finishes for him. “Is this one of Clark’s many getaway recommendations?”
I laugh, shaking my head. “I found it online.”
Tyler spits out his drink and can’t hold back his laugh. “You just found this place online? Did you search for small towns to live in Wyoming?”
“Actually…yeah.”
That only makes him laugh harder. “This just made my day.”
“I’m being so serious. Do you guys want to see it?”
Mitch nods. “Duh. Don’t leave us hanging here.”
Reaching for the side pocket of my jeans, I pull out my phone, open the saved website on my browser, and tilt it to face the guys. Tyler reaches over and swipes to see more.
“That’s it?” Tyler raises an eyebrow. “Coach, there’s one picture on that site.”
“Off the map is what I need. I spoke with a woman named Nan—”
“I’m sorry…what?” Tyler asks, shocked.
“I know. I thought it was strange, too. It’s even listed on the website as Nan.”
“I don’t think I like this anymore,” Mitch adds.
“I was nervous, too, but Nan made me feel a little more at ease, ensuring everything would be set up in my rental before I arrived. And…I’m going to have Sage with me.”
Both of their eyes widen simultaneously.
After sitting with my thoughts for as long as I did, I ended up going back up to April’s apartment after Sage went to bed to figure out how this would work for the three of us.
Sage was the most essential factor in the plans.
April spent years with me putting my job first, so now it’s her turn for a big opportunity while I take the necessary break that has been given to me.
After hours of discussion, we came to the conclusion that I’ll take Sage full-time instead of having her every other weekend, as per our current agreement.
“We were both concerned with the school situation. Once I stumbled on the website, I got the phone number for the school in town. Which took forever, might I add, because this website has next to nothing on it.”
“You could say that again,” Tyler scoffs.
“After hearing about what they have to offer compared to her current school, it was an easy decision for us after that.”
“Are you concerned with her switching in the middle of the school year, or the short time that you’re going to be there?” Mitch asks.
“I was, but we talked to Sage about it, and strangely enough, she’s so happy about the adventure. Besides, this move is only a six-month contract.”
“And how do you feel about it?” Mitch raises an eyebrow.
I shrug. “You know how I am. I roll with the punches and figure it out as I go. I’ll adjust.”
“I think this will be good for you two,” Tyler says.
“I’ve spent far too long not putting Sage first. I missed out on so much. I missed my chance at being a good dad,” I continue before they press the issue. “I’m choosing to believe this is all a sign from some upper universe that I’m getting a second chance at it.”
Emotions sit thick in my throat, so I avert my gaze from my best friends.
I land on a family sitting in a booth near us.
A mother, father, and daughter about the same age as Sage sit there, smiling, happy, and laughing.
The dad has two French fries tucked into his upper lip and makes walrus noises while his daughter laughs so hard that tears spill out of the corners of her eyes.
The mother stares at them with a wide grin that reaches her eyes.
That right there is a family.
That’s what a good dad is.
I can’t remember a single time when my family looked like that.
“You are a good dad,” Tyler says, shaking his head. “That little girl loves you.”
“For once, I agree with him,” Mitch chimes in, tipping his head in agreement. “What will you do when you come back? You’ll still coach, right?”
His question forces my gaze away from the family moment I invaded. “Clark told me not to make any decisions until closer to the season starting.”
Tyler brings his hand to his chest and gasps. “You? Making rash decisions? Blasphemy.”
I smile while Mitch and Tyler both start laughing.
They know me a little too well.
“I think this will be good for you,” Mitch says.
My chest feels tight, and I rub the ache away before taking another sip of my beer.
“I want to believe that, too.”