Chapter 14
ARE YOU REGRETTING COMING TO THIS DINNER YET?
Poppy
“Thank you for picking me up.”
Lily waves me off from the driver’s seat. “Please. It’s fine. You can’t help that your car won’t start.”
I sigh, letting my head fall back on the passenger seat’s headrest. I could have avoided this if I had just turned off the interior light last night when I got home.
I’m so mad at myself for not remembering.
But when I pulled into my driveway after having dinner at my parents’ house, Dallas was pulling Sage from the backseat of his SUV, likely after another one of their baseball practices.
She was asleep in his arms, and I found myself in a trance watching him and how careful and protective of her he was.
He held her like a porcelain doll he didn’t want to drop, then moved easily to unlock his door without even startling her.
When he closed the door behind him, switching the porch light off, I stayed there for another few minutes just staring, thinking about how attracted to that man I am.
There’s no use trying to fight how he makes me feel.
I told myself it’s because he lives close by, and I see him in this light that others normally wouldn’t.
I witnessed how he cared for his daughter like a creep from my car.
I witnessed how he coached those kids despite them being a hot mess.
I witnessed him smile more times than I can count.
“Who’s all going to be there tonight?”
Lily laughs. “It’s Griffin’s yearly winter dinner party, Poppy. So our normal crew. Nan obviously invited herself. But Tucker has befriended Dallas now that they’re coaching together, so I think he’ll be there with his daughter.”
“What?” I practically shout, sitting up higher in the seat. “I mean…what?” I repeat a few decibels lower.
“Whoa. I didn’t expect that reaction to the hot neighbor being invited to dinner at Griffin’s house. But now I want to know more.”
“There’s nothing to know.”
“Your reaction tells me that’s a lie.”
“Lily…” I exhale, trying to find a way to explain this to her. “We can’t be calling him the hot neighbor anymore.”
“We call it like we see it.”
“Okay, fine. But Dallas is…he’s different. I can’t deny that I’m attracted to him, which is a new thing for me. As you know, I don’t do the whole relationship thing. But Sage is my student, and my career comes first. Besides, Dallas is only going to be here for a few more months.”
“Perfect amount of time to lose your virginity. Finally,” she draws out.
“Lily!”
“What?” she laughs, pulling onto Barlow Drive toward Griffin’s house. “Listen, I know you don’t allow yourself to get involved in relationships because you hate the small-town talk. You hate the idea of people knowing your business, and if things don’t work out, you’d be walking on eggshells.”
I remain silent because she’s right.
To an extent.
She doesn’t know the real reasons why I avoid relationships.
“He’s not staying,” she continues, putting the car in park in the driveway and turning her body to face me.
“There’s no harm in allowing yourself this time.
It won’t take away from your job, and since it’s mostly just physical attraction for him, you won’t have to worry about your heart getting involved. ”
That’s what I worry about the most.
I don’t know what sex feels like or the impact it has on two people together. I’ll never admit this to my sister or anyone, for that matter, but I don’t even know what an orgasm feels like, as I’ve never attempted to give myself one. I just don’t know how, and it feels weird to me.
“You’re overthinking it,” Lily says, as if she’s reading my mind. “Take it one day at a time.”
That’s always been easier said than done because I’m always over analyzing everything to try and keep some resemblance of control in my life.
“Yeah, you’re right,” I admit.
“Now, let’s go inside and enjoy this night together,” she says with a hand on my shoulder.
I nod and offer her a weak smile.
My sister might be right, but what happens if I give Dallas all of me, I fall head over heels for him, and then he leaves? Then I’ll be left picking up the pieces of what I feared all along. Even though I know he’s leaving, would I be left feeling like I wasn’t enough?
Feeling like I wasn’t enough to make him stay?
“Did you want me to set up the boom box?” Nan asks.
Griffin glares at her. “What do you think?”
“You’re a changed man. I was hoping you were open to some music tonight. But I guess not.”
“You guessed correctly. This is just dinner, not karaoke night at Seven Stools.”
“Can be one in the same and you allow it.”
“I think the boom box is a great touch,” Tucker chimes in. “Good friends. Good music. Good mood,” he draws out the last word.
“Speaking of good friends,” Lily asks. “Where’s your new bestie?”
“He’ll be here. He would never let me down,” he says with conviction.
My insides continue to swirl with nerves, but the last few minutes have been laced with anticipation, too. I hate that I find myself wanting to see a man. Is this what having a crush feels like? Jesus, I need to get a grip.
The doorbell rings, and everything in my world pauses. I stop breathing as my head turns toward the hallway leading to the front door. Lily leaves to answer it, while I don’t move from where I’m sitting on the stool in the kitchen.
I force myself to relax my beating heart, but it does no good, because seconds later, Sage emerges with a stuffed rabbit in her hands that looks like it’s seen better days.
She seems nervous as she scans the room.
When her eyes land on me, she lights up.
She smiles wildly and comes rushing over to me, wrapping her tiny arms around my waist where I sit.
“Miss Barlow,” she almost whispers. “I’m so happy you’re here.”
I put an arm around her shoulder as she tightens her hold on me. She’s definitely nervous to be around new people and is clinging to the comfort of a familiar face.
“Who’s this you brought with you?” I ask, noticing the small stuffed rabbit in her hand.
“Daddy told me this is a dinner party with friends. And Mr. Marshmallow, beside you, is my favorite friend, so I thought I would bring him with me. He also makes me feel less nervous around a lot of people. But I don’t need him anymore now that you’re here.”
I breathe out a relieved sigh. As much as Sage finds comfort in me, I think I see it in her, too. I remember being her age and having a stuffed animal, which was my comfort item. It went everywhere with me.
“I’m so happy you’re here,” I say.
Lifting my eyes, I find Dallas staring at the two of us from the archway connecting the hallway and the kitchen with a wooden slab with various meats and cheeses on it in his hands.
He’s rooted there with his eyes laser-focused on the two of us while Tucker says something to him that he’s most definitely tuning out.
My breath hitches with the intensity of the stare, but I don’t allow him to see the effect he has on me.
Scanning him from head to toe, I notice he’s wearing dark wash jeans and a dark green checkered flannel.
I never once pegged Dallas for the type of wear flannels, but seeing it on him and how he has the sleeves rolled up just enough to showcase his strong forearms isn’t helping right now.
I bring my bottom lip between my teeth, but catch myself. However, Dallas catches the move before I can stop, and the corners of his lips twist into a grin as he averts his gaze to the ground, shaking his head while making his way in my direction.
Dammit.
“Daddy, look who’s here.” Sage beams, bouncing where she stands.
“Hey, Poppy.”
Two words. A simple greeting that has me practically melting in my seat with how he says them.
I’m about to open my mouth to say something—anything—but Nan steps between us.
“Cheese!” she shouts. “Griffin, charcuter-daddy brought a cheese board! This is what I was saying you were missing. There’s nothin’ like a wooden slab filled with meat and cheese.” She takes the tray from his hands. “Extra points in my book for this, Dallas.”
“Oh, hell yeah,” Tucker rushes over to where Nan places the board down. “Extra points for me, too. Even though you were on the verge of being capped out with me.”
“You put a cap on your people points?” Nan asks.
“In my defense, Dallas hit max the day I recognized who he was. And then he hit infinite numbers as time progressed.” Tucker shrugs.
“The math isn’t mathin’ for me, but okay,” Nan says, popping a cubed cheese in her mouth.
“His math never adds up for me either,” Griffin says, shaking his head. “I often wonder how the books at Seven Stools are correct.”
“There’s girl math, and then there’s Tucker math. It doesn’t make sense, yet it makes all the sense,” Blair adds.
“Damn straight,” Tucker says with a mouthful of cheese.
Dallas laughs, and I can’t help but do the same. “Are you regretting coming to this dinner yet?” I ask him.
His laughter fades, yet he maintains his signature grin across his lips, focusing all his attention on me. Goose bumps ripple across my skin as he looks me up and down.
“I knew you would be here.”
I blush. “That’s not really an answer.”
He shrugs. “I knew you would be here, so I don’t think I could regret coming tonight.
I’ve been waiting for another chance to see you again.
” He leans in over my shoulder, just enough to keep his voice down, but not enough that anyone would catch on.
“I came outside last night to see you, but you had already gone inside.”
I rear back to look him in the eyes and my lips part, knowing I was caught creeping on his private moment, bringing Sage inside. My cheeks flame even more than before.
He leans in again. “I like it when you watch me.”
I clear my throat, turning away from Dallas so he doesn’t see what he’s doing to me with every word out of his mouth.
What do I even say back to that?