Chapter 27
YOU DESERVE TO FIND HAPPINESS IN YOUR LIFE, DALLAS.
Dallas
I called Tucker to cancel baseball practice tonight because I didn’t want to bring Sage with her lingering headache or leave her with anyone. He insisted on handling it and keeping it as scheduled. I don’t know what to think about that, but I’m going to let Tucker have this one.
My second call is to April.
I save her for last because I know this one will be longer.
“Hey, Dallas,” she says on the other end.
“Hey, April. Sorry to call you while you’re still at work, but there was an accident at school today.”
“Oh my god. Dallas! What!”
“It’s okay. She’s okay. I probably should have led with that. I’m sorry.”
“You think?”
“She fell off the swing at recess and hit her head. She didn’t need to go to the doctor, and there were no cuts. She just has a bump on her head, and there’s no signs of a concussion or anything.”
When I left the nurse, that was the first thing I asked. From my years of playing sports, I know a concussion when I see one. I know the signs to look for and when things start to indicate that we need to implement some type of medical intervention.
This isn’t that.
“Okay,” she breathes out on the other end. “That’s good. I’m going to leave now and come there.”
“Of course. Sage will love that. We’re hanging in tonight, so we will be here.”
“See you soon.”
She hangs up, and I spend the next half hour straightening up the kitchen and putting her backpack from school away. Just as I’m about to sit down on the couch next to Sage, there’s a knock on the door.
“Who’s that?” Sage asks.
“Not sure.”
When I open the door, I see Poppy standing on the other side, holding a box in one hand and a basket in the other. She’s still wearing the same outfit she had on at school—a pair of bright pink jeans and a tucked-in T-shirt with an apple on the front. She hasn’t even taken off her work lanyard.
She came right here.
I’m not surprised, given the state of mind she was in when I left her in her classroom. She blames herself, and I hate that. I fucking hate that she’s blaming herself for this, and I wish I had the right words for her to know she did nothing wrong.
“Hey,” she says softly. “I’m sorry to show up unannounced, but I wanted to see that Sage was okay. I brought her some goodies, too.”
“You didn’t have to do that, Poppy. But she’s going to love it.”
I step back, letting her in, and Sage notices her.
“Poppy! You’re here!” She sits up taller on the couch, and I watch as Poppy assesses her from head to toe. Her shoulders relax as if seeing her was what she needed. “I’m all better now. Just have a bumpy bump on my head.”
“That’s so great to hear. I brought you some goodies.” She lifts the arm with the box. “I got a six-pack of assorted muffins from Batter Up.” Then she lifts the basket. “And I put together a little basket of coloring things for you since I know it’s your favorite.”
Sage claps her hands in excitement. “This is so fun. My head feels much better already.”
Poppy and I laugh simultaneously, because it’s always the little things.
I stare at Poppy while she looks at Sage in wonder. She looks at her like she’s the light of her life, or maybe I’m reading too much into it.
She just fits.
And it’s so much deeper than that for me.
Poppy was right to say she’s not like other girls I’ve been with, and it has nothing to do with her being inexperienced.
It has everything to do with how I’ve approached things with her.
Did I flirt hard at the start before I knew she was Sage’s teacher?
Yes. Did I slow down and control myself when I found out?
Also yes. All of it’s an approach I’ve never taken before.
With April and all my past relationships, it’s been physical before it got any deeper.
It’s the opposite with Poppy, and maybe that’s why I’m feeling the way I do about her.
There’s no denying that I’m hooked on her.
She’s like a song you can’t help but play on repeat.
Her eyes find mine, and they lock there. A smile grows on her lips when she sees me already watching her—drinking her in.
“I’m going to grab us some drinks,” I say, clearing my throat. “Poppy, would you like something?”
She nods. “I’ll help.”
She follows me into the kitchen, keeping her distance, and I hate it.
“She’s okay?” she asks almost immediately.
“She is.”
Silence in the room stretches. I grab the pitcher of iced tea I made earlier today and three cups from the cabinet. I fill them each and hand her one.
“I don’t know if this makes you feel any better, but I was scared shitless. I’ve never been scared like that in my life. Not after my accident. Not during intense games. Not ever.”
She averts her gaze to the floor because she knows the feeling.
“I don’t know how to handle this part of parenthood—the unexpected things that happen. I know about head injuries, but it’s different when it’s your kid. I’m really trying to be a good dad.”
Poppy moves forward, palm connecting with my forearm. “But you are.”
I offer her a soft, reassuring smile. “I’m starting to feel like one. One day at a time, I’m starting to feel more like a dad than a father.”
“It’s the same thing.”
I shake my head. “If there’s one thing I’ve learned through life, it’s that anyone can be a father. But it takes a lot more effort, time, and love to be a dad.”
“I don’t have experience being a parent, but from the many meetings I’ve had with them at the school, I think they all feel that way one time or another.
There’s no rule book for parenting or what to do when things happen.
It’s just something you have to learn along the way.
You’re a really good dad, Dallas.” She removes her hand from my forearm and looks to the ground before nervously wringing her hands together.
“And I’m not just saying that because I like you. ”
I soak in every word she says because she means them.
Every. Single. One of them.
“You like me, huh?”
She rolls her eyes. “Out of everything I just said, that’s what you’re stuck on?”
“I’m stuck on every word out of your mouth always, honey.”
She blushes at my admission, and I smirk. “But in all seriousness. Thank you for everything. It means everything that you came here today to bring that stuff for Sage. I think she would say the same.”
“She means a lot to me.”
I close the space between us, wrapping my hand around the side of her neck, and she looks up at me. My eyes trail from her eyes to her lips and the way she opens her mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. But she doesn’t look away.
“This place is changing me, Poppy.” My admission shocks even me, but I can’t take it back. “Being here, it’s everything that I needed.”
I move closer to her, just a little, letting my lips hover as if waiting for permission to kiss her again and letting her have this control. I wonder if she can hear the thunder of my heart beating in my chest.
She reaches up on her toes and presses her lips to mine.
There’s no rush in this kiss, and it’s not explosive fireworks.
It’s slow and tentative. Her fingertips graze my jaw before the tangle in my hair, and it feels like she’s anchoring herself to me.
So I wrap my arms around her waist, kissing her like maybe my showing up is everything she’s needed too.
She pulls away, ending the kiss more quickly than I would have liked.
“We should bring Sage her drink,” she says, blushing and hiking a thumb over her shoulder.
“You’re probably right.”
She grabs two glasses, and I grab mine. When she enters the living room, Sage is immersed in the latest episode of Spidey and His Amazing Friends. Poppy sits down right next to her.
Just as I’m about to sit down again, the front door opens.
“Mommy!” Sage says, leaping off the couch and into April’s arms. “What are you doing here?”
“Daddy called me, and I wanted to see that you were okay.”
“I’m okay,” Sage says before brushing her hair back and revealing the bump. “I gots this. But it doesn’t hurt anymore.”
“Oof. Yeah, you really hit your head hard. You take after your dad with your recklessness, it seems.”
Sage laughs and heads back to the couch, and that’s when April notices Poppy for the first time.
Everything in me is on high alert. I’ve never discussed another woman with April, and she hasn’t seen me with anyone since our divorce years ago.
She knows my history and that I was casually seeing women here and there, but she knew my rule was never to bring them around Sage.
“Hi, Miss Barlow,” April says to her before facing me and raising an eyebrow.
Poppy stands abruptly. “I’m sorry to intrude here. Sage fell on the playground today, and I wanted to come by and make sure she was okay.”
“That’s very sweet of you.”
Poppy nods and looks at me. “I’m going to head home. Thank you for letting me stop by.” She turns around to Sage. “Feel better, Sage.”
“Thank you, Poppy!”
Poppy’s eyes lock with mine, and I want to pull her into my arms, tuck her under my shoulder, and tell her she has nothing to worry about—that she can stay. That April is here for Sage. I can’t read her face to know if she’s upset, mad, or anything.
The door closes behind her, and I feel like I’m suffocating already.
April is about to bombard me with questions.
“Did you ice her head?” she asks, shocking me because that’s not what I expected.
“Yes.”
“Good.” She nods and makes her way to the kitchen as if she’s been here a hundred times before.
I follow her, waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under me.
Once she’s in the kitchen, she turns around to face me. “So, does her teacher come here often?”
And there it is.
“No.”
It’s not a lie, but the long stretch of silence coming from April leads me to believe she doesn’t buy it. I let the tension linger in the air, and just as I’m ready to open my mouth to say something, she cuts me off.
“I like her.”
“What?”
“I’m saying I like her. I don’t know what’s happening between you two, aside from her being Sage’s teacher, but I hope you know that I don’t care who you date.
Even though we didn’t work out, I know you’re not stupid enough to bring someone around Sage who would hurt her.
I know I’ve only met her once at the conference we had at the school, but the communication on the app tells me she’s friendly and a great teacher.
I don’t blame you for liking her, too, if you do. ” She shrugs.
That…is not what I was expecting.
“She’s different,” I settle on, unsure if this is a trap and something that will lead to an argument. “I do like her and care about her.”
She eyes me carefully before her features soften. She steps closer to me, putting a hand on my shoulder. “You deserve to find happiness in your life, Dallas. I mean it when I say I don’t care who you see, just like I know you don’t care who I see.”
And she’s right. I don’t care because I know she will only have Sage’s best interests in mind when she brings anyone around her.
But her saying it out loud is almost the confirmation I needed.
I wasn’t worried about what April would think about me being involved with anyone; I was more concerned with the possibility of her judging me.
I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because I’ve fucked up so much in the past that she would hold it against me.
“So if something were to happen with me and Poppy, you’d be okay with it?”
She scoffs, waving me off. “Dallas, please. I’m okay with whatever makes you happy. As long as it makes Sage happy, too.”
“We’re not here much longer, though.”
“Do you think you’d want to stay in Bluestone Lakes?”
The question catches me off guard because it’s not something I had considered until just now. Would I want to stay here? Can I see myself living here and giving up baseball completely?
“Clark is waiting for a decision from me before we head back.”
“Do you know what you’ll do?”
I shake my head.
She looks away, biting her bottom lip to fight a smile forming on her lips. “Now probably isn’t the best time to tell you, but a few things have come up in the city.”
“Like what?”
“Well, for one, they offered me a permanent spot as head of the obstetrics department team,” she says proudly.
“April, that’s amazing.”
“And, I, kind of, sort of, maybe met someone?” she says, but it comes out like a question.
I laugh. “Didn’t you just tell me you don’t care who I see, and I don’t care who you see. It’s great that you met someone, April.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I guess it puts me at a crossroads. I don’t know what to do because our life is still back in San Francisco.”
“Are you saying you’d like to stay out here possibly?”
She shrugs.
I know she doesn’t want to admit it because we’ve spent our lives around my baseball career. We came out to Wyoming because I wanted her to put her job first for once. I don’t want to be the reason she gives up on that.
“Let’s see what happens in the next few weeks,” I tell her.
“Good idea.”
Everything about this temporary stay here in Bluestone Lakes has changed me. If this conversation had happened months ago, I’d be saying “Sure, let’s stay.” But here we are, standing in the kitchen of my rental, with level heads, as we figure out the next step.
Except now, I can’t stop thinking about what would happen if I did stay here.