Chapter 33 Emani
“In how many ways has that man folded you up that your hair is matted like this?” Derrick asked detangling Emani’s tresses.
Emani sat in the plush chair of her new beauty room in need of organizing, with her eyes closed and body relaxed. The candle that the masseuse left to calm her mind was still burning in the corner and she welcomed the aroma in her nostrils.
“Between fighting and getting folded, the hair was the last thing on my mind. Plus, my first night, I didn’t have a bonnet. It was a lot.”
“I understand. How are you feeling? Malik has been so quiet online, Sandi and Joanna too. Even Janet has shut the fuck up,” Derrick stated, filling her in. “I’m just mad you cut that check for that little boy.”
“It’s not his fault his parents are trash ass human beings. I made a promise and I don’t go back on my word. If she wants to have another kid by a man that can’t pay rent or anything else, that’s on her.”
Derrick cackled. “You know I’m still gagged that you were paying yourself your lease. How you keep that from him?”
“Like I kept everything else, can’t be stupid and settle. I’ve done both before.”
Derrick hummed. “Well, now you got your man back. Outside of the massage and aroma therapy, you feel lighter. You haven’t felt like this ever and how long have I known you? You’re home.”
Emani smiled and then it faded. “I just hope I can stay home and not have to be made an example of.”
“Oh, girl!” Donnée blew as she walked into the room dropping her bag down on the dresser across from where Emani sat. “Jahlil is being cheap and not having anyone put this room together?”
“No, he wanted it all done up and I told him I’d do it. I’m not doing anything but sitting here, I can hang some clothes up. What’s up, you look good.”
Donnée smiled. “I know. I just left court for your preliminary hearing.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Emani huffed, covering her face. “They’re going to send me to jail aren’t they?”
“Because your man and your pretend man told me not to say anything to you until it was handled,” Donnée shared.
“Well?” Emani and Derrick asked in tandem.
“It’s handled. Malik is laid up in the hospital for some gambling debt, Janet is refusing to speak, matter of fact, she retracted her statement. Joanna and Sandi both have NDA’s and can’t say shit anyway, you’re welcome for that. The judge felt like Malik’s gambling beat down took the cake. But…”
“But…” Emani parroted.
“His words were ‘tell your client if this happens again, she’s going to jail’ and then he asked for an early release of your next album. What can I say, he’s a fan.”
Emani sighed, letting the final weight fall off of her shoulders. “Thank you, Donnée.”
Donnée hugged her warmly and let Emani release the final tears. “Girl, don’t thank me for loving you. We are all we got. But the big thanks goes to your man. He hired the other attorney and told him what wasn’t going to happen.”
Derrick squealed and clapped his hands. “That man said he ain’t losing his girl again. I know that’s right. Yes, big daddy Jahlil. Give him a baby.”
“You wanted me to give Malik a baby too. I’m not following your judgement,” Emani sassed.
“Oh girl, I was clowning. You weren’t even letting that man break you in half. I ain’t never heard of no weak dick nigga making babies with a bad bitch. Must be your uterus or something. Doesn’t accept weak sperm.”
“That man never hit me raw. Never. And some men just can’t do it.”
“But Big Daddy Jahlil can. I’ve seen your walk, he’s putting you through the mattress and you deserve that shit.
You deserve all this shit. To be soft and held like you’re a rose.
It’s more than your name. It’s who you are and it’s time to enter your soft girl era,” Derrick spoke.
“Starting with this hair. Hard wig soft life?”
“I don’t know why you would want to waste your time like that,” Donnée spoke, laughing as she traipsed across the room to finish putting Emani’s things on the hangers. “Jahlil was slinging those wigs everywhere all week.”
“Let’s just blow it out. There’s a game tomorrow night, I want to have something different,” Emani suggested. “Something that doesn’t look like my mugshot.”
“Can we put the mugshot on an album or shirt at least? That shit was fire. Full beat, hair up, that smirk on your face. You ate that up,” Derrick whooped.
“That’s her first one, might as well capitalize off of it,” Donnée quipped.
“Can I even make music or is the label keeping my voice too?” Emani asked over her shoulder.
“Your voice and your name you can keep. I say put out a cute little EP popping your shit and let the chips fall where they may,” Donnée stated, roaming into the closet.
“You got your equipment here, the kids are in school all day. Jahlil is about to be in the swing of the season, this is the perfect time for you to jump back in that raw and unfiltered bag without the label telling you what to record. It’s your savage season, baby. ”
Derrick hummed in agreement. “You didn’t go to homecoming for nothing. You needed to be reminded of who you were. Put everything into that EP and show that label and the world you don’t need nothing but yourself, E.”
After hours of blowing her hair out, making her up and getting dressed, Emani was shotgun in Jahlil’s Lambo with the top back blowing her layered silk press, headed toward Mara Blu.
An Italian restaurant they used to dream about dining at.
When he stopped at the valet, Emani chuckled to herself and watched Jahlil step out and round the hood to retrieve her.
Hand in hand, they strolled into the restaurant and were seated on the patio.
“Remember when we dreamt about being able to afford a glass of water here?” Jahlil mused, lacing his fingers in hers.
Emani smiled. “Yeah and you’d attempt to make bruschetta but it just turned into grill cheese and tap water.”
“I tried though,” Jahlil said with a smile. “You had me hooked on that smile. Still do.”
“I have a lot to smile about today.”
“Oh yeah?” Jahlil buzzed like he didn’t know where the source of her peace had come from.
“Oh yeah. You hired a lawyer for me?” Emani quizzed.
Jahlil nodded. “Sure as hell did. I need you with me. Need that shit like air.”
“The charges are dropped. Apparently, Malik being beat up by whoever he “owed” is more pressing,” Emani replied. “And for that, I smile. I’m trying to figure out how to thank you for that.”
“Rose,” he rumbled her name after kissing the crook of her neck. “You never need to thank me. Ever. You win. You love my kids. You love me. There’s nothing else I need.”
“You know I like when you talk like that,” she hummed, clinging on to his words. “You’re the safest place I’ve known.”
“I’ll hold that space forever, even when you’re mad at me and I’m mad at you. It’ll still be safe. It’ll still be yours.”
She groaned. “Stop it.”
“Nah.” Jahlil’s eyes were trained on her, taking her in. “You’re beautiful.”
Emani bit her bottom lip, leaned in and whispered in his ear. “You are too. Tonight, after sassy pants is back in her bed, tell me that while you slow grind.”
“Shit, you sure you want to eat?” Jahlil grumbled, shifting in his seat.
Emani giggled. “Yes, I’m hungry. How was practice? You ready for tomorrow?”
“Born ready. You ready?”
“To cheer like I used to? Hell yeah. Any outfit requests?”
Jahlil shook his head. “Put it on so I can take it off.”
Emani rolled her eyes. “Yeah okay, you’ll be knocked out by the time your head hits the pillow.”
“You right but I can dream about undressing you,” Jahlil stated in a joking tone.
This place she was settling into was full of warmth and softness and for the first time in years, she welcomed it.
There wasn’t any worry about how bad it’d hurt to neglect herself, or if she was dropped.
She was loved here and respected. What more could a girl who’d craved love all her life ask for?
“And wake up and have Sanaa telling us that we can’t cuss and kiss?” Emani laughed. “Uh uh, papa.”
“Her little ass is noseeeyyy,” Jahlil drew out. “On the way to school this morning, she asked me why I can’t just hold your hand and not cuss and why can’t she hold hands with us too.”
Emani covered her face and shook her head. “I mean you were holding my hand. She’s not nosey either. She’s curious. She’s been hanging out with old women all her life, I can tell.”
“Smoking markers, cussin’ like she’s on social security and playing bridge. She’s the oldest four year old I know.”
“Tell me what she needs, like in your opinion?”
Jahlil pulled in a deep breath and looked over the ocean then back at Emani. “Safety. Not that she’s not safe, but I know what it feels like to be fatherless and damn near motherless. She has no idea what a mother is supposed to offer.”
“I sensed that. I know that feeling. I don’t want to take over that space though.”
“Why not? Her mother is never coming back. She signed over her rights. Sanaa needs that. And I’m not putting pressure on you either. We just got back together and I know it’s like being in a vortex.”
Emani shook her head. “No, actually, I like it. Love it actually. I just don’t want to overstep my role.”
“As far as I’m concerned, Rose. You’re going to be my wife. There is no role to overstep. This is our family. And if you had a kid, I would feel the same. They would be mine too.”
Emani kissed her lips. “You lying.”
“I’m not. I’d love that kid just like it were mine. Not it’s daddy, I’d make that nigga disappear without second thought.”
A snort of laughter fell from Emani’s lips. “Jahlil, please!”
“It’s always Jahlil please when I’m dead ass serious. Nigga would’ve been in the dirt.”
“Was that your intention with …”
“Yeah but I figured him having to watch how good I’m going to love you was a better get back. Bitch ass nigga invited me to a sham engagement and was useless. And I should’ve knocked his head off his shoulders then but I was trying to be a team player and shit.”
“You do not play well with others. I actually thought you might’ve snatched me up,” Emani admitted.
“Is that what you wanted?” Jahlil brow rose.
“Mm,” Emani grunted. “I might’ve imagined what it would’ve been like if you popped up at a show and told me you left her and you wanted me to come home. And then it would piss me off because we were on two different journeys and I’d write a song about how I couldn’t stand you.”
Jahlil shook his head. “All I heard was that you still loved a nigga. I just hurt you. Not going to lie, I played out how I was coming for you over and over.”
“It pan out how you wanted?”
“Better because I got to whoop some ass in the process. I don’t get to do that shit often,” Jahlil joked.
“Let our ass whopping days be behind us. Let’s just move forward with harmony. I’ve really been craving some happiness and joy.”
“That’s what you’re going to get too. Watch me, E.”
“The Savage Show is my favorite.”
The selection of food Jahlil arranged prior to their arrival came to the table and he sat in this moment. No phone, no distractions, no Ashton in the corner saying or doing something wild. It was just them, in their bubble dreaming again.
“You thought about what your next move is?” Jahlil posed, watching her eat her gelato between feeding him bites.
She buzzed and shrugged. “An EP. Something new. Something that’s mine. Some savage season shit.”
“Oh that shit is about to be fire. Yeah, that label can kiss all of your ass. Make sure they feel it in their chest too. Raw, uncut E.Rose. The one that looked me in my eyes and popped her shit.”