Chapter 10 #2
And the look on her face—stricken, sad—almost made him regret his honesty. But Zander found he wanted to keep cracking that glass between them, to see what might happen if he kept tapping. “But whoever I was then, Penny, I worked like hell to grow up, to be something different for Winter.”
“I know.” Penny let out a long, slow breath. “I know. And I’m sorry for assuming you hadn’t. I should have let you grow up, even just in my head.”
She lifted a hand again, sweeping hair out of her face, and all Zander could see was the sky behind her, all the air high above the ground.
He shot a hand out to cover the one Penny still had on the ladder, wrapping his fingers around hers to keep her attached.
“It would be much easier to accept your apology if you would please keep both your hands on the ladder.”
Penny looked to where his hand draped over hers, then raised her brows at him. “I can’t do my work with both hands on the ladder.”
“Lucky for me you aren’t doing your work right now. So please put your other hand back so I can apologize, too.”
The corner of her mouth tipped up. “You’re going to apologize?”
“Your other hand, Becker.”
Penny sighed dramatically and returned her other hand to the ladder. It was time to let her go. But this wasn’t a touch through the bee suit, this was the real thing—Zander’s skin on hers. Penny’s hand was soft and warm, flexing beneath his palm. He wasn’t ready to give it up just yet.
If she noticed, it didn’t wipe the smile off her face. “I hope this isn’t going to be like the apology you gave Brad Preston.”
Zander laughed. “That was pretty good, huh?”
She shrugged. “It was all right.”
“Oh, come on—”
Penny’s eyebrows arched. “Don’t change the subject.”
“Okay.” Zander cleared his throat. “I don’t know a delicate way to say this,” he started tentatively. “But I kind of hated you.”
Penny’s pretty mouth dipped in a frown. “We didn’t even know each other.”
“I didn’t say it was reasonable. But one of my first days here, I walked through those trees between our houses, and I saw you laughing with your family, and I just—” He swiped a thumb across her hand, grounded by the contact even as she was twenty feet up.
“I hated you for having the things I wanted.”
Her smile fell. “Zander—”
“And then my papou.” Zander shook out a gravelly laugh.
“You don’t even know, Penny. You were this model child in his mind.
He was always telling me about everything you did to help your family, how well you did at school, how much everyone loved you.
You were everything I’d never be. You were so perfect, and I hated you for it. ”
Penny swallowed and blinked, her eyes shining. “I’m not perfect. I’ve never been perfect. And I hate that anything I did was used against you.”
“So do I. But it was my problem that I held on to it for so long.” Zander finally lifted his hand from Penny’s and presented it to her, palm open. “Fresh start?”
She eyed his offer. “You know I’ll have to let go of the ladder to shake your hand?”
He lifted his brows. “But you’ll be holding on to me, so you’ll still be safe.”
Her eyes, lighter than the deep blue of afternoon behind her, stayed on him as she pressed her palm to his. “Fresh start.”
But Zander didn’t let go, because he wasn’t done. There was one more thing he wanted.
“Let me help with the Honey Festival.”
Her smile vanished. “I thought that was settled.”
“That was before our fresh start.” Zander lowered Penny’s hand back to the ladder, making sure she was holding on before he threaded his fingers together on the windowsill.
“What you said before, about how you didn’t let me grow up in your mind.
About how you assumed I was just like those old stories… ”
“I said I was sorry.”
“That’s how everyone here is looking at me.
You saw that at the market with Brad. With everybody watching, waiting for me to react like an angry teenager.
Like that destructive kid who was always looking for trouble.
” He shook his head, remembering that afternoon with Winter, the slam of the screen door, and a promise.
“I promised Winter I would try to make this summer work. And I can’t do that if no one sees me as more than that kid I was.
This is something I can do—something real and concrete and actually helpful—to show this place that I’m worthwhile. To show Winter that I’m worthwhile.”
“The festival.” Penny spoke slowly, like every word was chosen with care.
“This year especially, it’s…” She sighed.
“It’s really important. It might seem silly, because it’s just some small-town event, but it’s really, really important to me.
And I can’t afford to have you jump in to make yourself a hero and leave me hanging. ”
Zander was set to argue his case, but then he remembered all the times, even in the short period he’d known her this summer, that she’d steadfastly refused help. Maybe it hadn’t been because she was perfect, but because she hadn’t found the people who were good at helping her.
“Let me start with a small job to prove my mettle. If I screw it up, you can fire me, no hard feelings.”
She scrutinized him with narrowed eyes. “One small job.”
“One small job.”
She grinned, just barely. “And if you want this badly to prove yourself, I want something else out of the deal.”
“Anything.”
Penny’s gaze dropped to his mouth as Zander gripped the windowsill so hard that old paint chipped beneath his fingers. If there wasn’t a window frame between them, if she wasn’t dangerously high off the ground…
“I want you to help RJ.”
Zander coughed, righting his overactive brain. “RJ? How?”
“He won’t shut up about you since you said his pastry looked perfect. He holds a lot—stuff at the farm, stuff for his mom—and baking has made him happy. I want you to use your fancy business skills to see if you can help him take it further, maybe make a business out of it.”
Penny might not want his help, but she did see some value in him for RJ, and it satisfied Zander more than it should have. “You think I have fancy business skills, huh?”
“Come on,” she groaned. “Is it a deal or not?”
Never in Zander’s life would he have predicted that he’d be bargaining with a woman on a ladder to win himself a spot planning a honey festival, but here he was.
Back in Sullivan’s Glen, fighting to keep his promise to his kid.
And, if he was being honest with himself, looking forward to spending a little more time with Penny Becker.
“Deal.”
“Okay.” Penny stepped higher on the ladder. “Then open up the black bag and hand me the vacuum. It’s time to collect some bees.”