CHAPTER 1
HONOR
Iwas sixteen when I found out I was adopted.
In the back of my mind, I think I’d always known.
I looked nothing like my parents. I was blonde and blue-eyed, while they both had dark-hair, and though my mother had blue eyes, they weren’t even close to the same shade as mine.
There were no hospital pictures or movies of my birth or pictures of my mom pregnant in my baby album.
When they finally told me, they talked about my birth mother and how she’d made the choice to give me up.
My mother spoke about how much my biological mother, Angel, had loved me, and that it had nearly broken her to give me up.
My mom told me that as she handed me to my mother, she said that she had one request, that my parents would name me Honor.
She’d only been eighteen when she had me, and I couldn’t imagine how hard it must have been for her to make such a tough decision.
In the end, I was thankful that she had.
I had amazing parents who doted on me. My life had been nothing but happy.
I was blessed, and I knew it. They always put me first. I was incredibly grateful that Angel had made the hard decision she had.
I could not imagine life without my parents being there for me.
Until the day my parents died, I’d lived a charmed life—wanting for nothing.
I went to college and trained to be a teacher. It was a job I loved. I couldn’t think of anything better than spending time with little ones, moulding them, and enjoying the way they looked at life. Each day was always new and exciting as no two days were ever the same.
Naively, I thought I had it made. I would always be that happy with teaching and spending time with my parents when I wasn’t in the classroom.
But then fate stepped in and snatched my parents from me in a car accident.
I was devastated and left floundering. It was the first time in my life where I didn’t have everything I wanted.
My only consolation was that they died together.
But, like always, my parents made sure that even if they died, I was financially secure and wanted for nothing.
However, all the memories staring at me every time I walked in a room of our house was killing me.
After their funerals, I realised that there was no way I could ever stay in our family home without them.
So, I hired a company, packed up all our belongings and put them in storage.
I also determined that while I couldn’t live in our home, I also couldn’t sell our home, so, I found a company to manage it and I rented out the house instead.
I found that I needed to get out. Go see the world. I felt lost. Like I had no home. I guess my parents were my home all this time.
Not sure what to do anymore, other than knowing I couldn’t stay in the town we’d been living in.
I took off travelling in our old camper van wherever the wind would take me.
I travelled from state to state, depending on the seasons, taking my time to grieve two of the best people I’d had the privilege of knowing.
That had been two years ago. My parents had left a hole in my heart that I wasn’t sure would ever heal.
I’d been thinking about where to move on to next when my phone rang. I was surprised to see it was Jake calling.
Jake wasn’t a stranger to me. He’d visited my parents periodically over the years.
They’d been friends. I never thought anything of it.
His number had been in the paperwork they left me.
They’d left a note telling me if I ever needed help to contact him.
That's why his number was on my phone. Even though I hadn’t spoken to—or thought of—him in years.
I nearly didn’t answer but for some reason I had a feeling that I should. In the end, I was glad I took his call.
“Hello?”
“Honor, hi, this is Jake Monde. Not sure if you remember me?”
“I do. You were a friend of my parents. What can I do for you, Jake?”
Jake exhales what I can only assume is a relieved breath.
“That’s right, I was.”
He’s silent long enough for me to start to worry.
“Are you okay, Jake?”
He sighs again. In the background, I hear a woman’s voice say, “Just ask her, Jake. She can only say no.”
My lips curl with amusement. She sounds so frustrated with Jake and his long silences.
“Woman,” he growls. “Let me do this my way.”
“Your way is taking too long.”
I laugh softly when he mutters something under his breath. I’m not expecting the call to go the way it does though. It knocks me for a loop.
“Fuck’s sake, okay.” He grumbles under his breath before he continues in a normal tone.
“Honor, I know your parents told you that you were adopted. What you don’t know is that your biological mother was adopted into my family.
She’s never once forgotten you. Recently, she’s reconnected with your biological dad, and they would like to know if you would like to meet them.
They’ll understand if you don’t. But, I know it would really do both of them some good, and now, with your parents gone, I thought it might even do you some good.
Even if it is just for a little bit of time.
But, again, we all would understand if you said no. ”
I’m stunned. This wasn’t what I’d expected.
I mean I was curious about them. Who wouldn’t be?
But I had never thought about meeting them.
Actually, that’s a lie. I had, but I wasn’t sure if they would want to meet me.
I’d been so busy running away, trying to heal, that I hadn’t given my biological parents a thought in years.
“Oh, wow,” I breathe. “I don’t know, Jake. I mean…that’s a big one.. maybe. Sure. No. Maybe. Uh, can I think about it?”
Jake chuckles, “You sound just like Angel. She had the same reaction except she ended with, ‘ask me one on sports’.”
Laughter erupts before I can hold it back. “I guess we’re both a little scared,” I admit.
Jake grunts. I shake my head. My dad used to do the same thing.
“I get it,” he says. “But, please know that she’s never forgotten you.”
I hesitate before asking my next question. I’ve always wondered if I had other siblings out there.
“Does she have any other children?”
“No, sweetheart. Just you.”
“Oh,” I’m surprised, and a little sad for her. If I get the chance I’ll have as many as I can. Naturally or not. “Um, Jake, can you give me a few days to think about it?”
“Of course, sweetheart. My wife, Fern, and I are touring around different states at the moment but will be making our way to the Dakotas within the next week.”
“Is that where she lives?”
“It is. Angel, my other daughter Siera, and my granddaughters have recently bought a garden centre there and are fixing it up. Your biological father is in an MC there.”
“Oh.” My heart sank. I knew, realistically, that not all clubs were bad, but you don’t grow up the daughter of an ex-marshal and not learn things.
Jake laughed having heard the worry in my tone.
“That was my first reaction. And while they are a one-percent club, they’re actually pretty clean compared to most one-percent clubs.
They’ve got their fingers in a few legal ventures.
One of them is a garage. Your father is the manager there.
I wouldn’t have allowed my girls to move anywhere near there if I’d been worried.
There are other reasons I am confident in the MC, but they aren’t something I can discuss on the phone.
Just know that if you do decide to meet your biological parents, you’ll be safe.
They wouldn’t want you in any danger either. ”
Relief fills me. I would have hated it if they had been in danger although, why I was worried when I didn’t know them, I wasn’t sure.
“That’s good to know. Give me a few days to think about it, and I’ll let you know what I decide.”
“Okay sweetheart. No problem. I’ll give you a call in a few days.”
“Perfect,” I agreed. “Bye, Jake.”
Ending the call, I sat thinking. I didn’t say anything, but I was currently at a campsite near the Black Hills in South Dakota.
It was almost like I was being drawn here all along.
The Dakotas hadn’t been on my itinerary for this year, but about six weeks ago I’d suddenly changed course and slowly made my way here, taking time to stop and see sights along the way.
I would do what I told Jake. I needed time to think about whether this was something I wanted to do. Meeting my biological parents was a huge, scary step, and I wasn’t sure if I was ready.
***
I’m not sure who I was kidding. It didn’t take me more than a day to call Jake back and tell him that I would like to meet my biological parents.
In the end, curiosity won out. Am I like them? Do I look like my biological parents? Do we do things in a similar way? I just couldn’t stop wondering.
That’s how I found myself following behind the large RV that Jake and Fern Monde were in.
I liked them. Each time we would stop somewhere to stretch our legs, they spent time with me.
Telling me stories about my parents, what they knew about my mom, Angel, and my dad, who’s road name is Axle.
I heard how they’d reconnected. It was something that’s for sure.
Star-crossed lovers. Like a story right out of a romance novel.
It soothed my romantic soul that they’d found each other again. I loved that for them. I’m glad they were happy after so many years of sadness. I was stunned to find out how Axle had never stopped looking for Angel. He’d looked for her for twenty-eight years.
I swear that made me hope that there was someone out there for me that would love me so much he didn’t stop looking for me no matter how many years passed by.