Chapter 1 – Gutta Barbie
Chapter
One
GUTTA BARBIE
Isat in the holding cell with my lawyer, Tiffany, sitting next to me, offering me the sweetest deal ever.
She was asking me to give up all the information that I had on Wrizzle for a shorter sentence.
They wanted everything that I knew. All the murders, hits, robberies, the drugs, guns, and locations of all his stash houses.
“Chanel, sometimes life isn't always about helping other people. There comes a point in time when you have to look out for yourself. I know that your love runs deep for Wrizzle, but do you really think that the love you share is worth giving up your freedom?” Tiffany said.
I sat there unwilling to budge. I wasn't giving up my man.
“Look around you; this is about to be your home for the rest of your life while that man of yours is gonna be out on the streets doing God knows what.”
That was something that I thought about often, me and Wrizzle had several conversations about what would happen between us if I did have to spend the rest of my life in prison.
“He's not just my man; he's my best friend. I can’t turn on him.” I told her with my arms crossed. I slid the paperwork she wanted me to sign back towards her. I didn't want any of the deals those slick-ass prosecutors were offering.
“I really need you to think about this, Chanel.
This is real, the charges you are fighting aren't going anywhere any time soon.
They have too much evidence stacked against you, and I don't ever see you walking out of here unless you make the choice to do what's best for you.
You're being given the option to have a second chance at your freedom. To go home and start a family, to be with your friends and loved ones.”
“Tiffany, please miss with all the bullshit. I already told you that there's no way I'm switching up on my man, and that's final.” I felt like she was pressuring me way too long, and I was starting to feel it. The walls felt like they were closing in on me.
I knew that Tiffany was just doing her job, that she was paid to do, which was to look out for me, but I needed her to understand that I wasn't a turncoat type of bitch.
I was born and raised on the streets, and when I make a decision to do something, I stand by it.
There were secrets that I was holding for Wrizzle, but he was also holding onto secrets for me.
We rode for each other. It wasn't a one-way street.
When it came to each other, there was no switching up; we stood back to back, ten toes against whoever, no matter the cost.
“I'm going to be honest with you, I feel like you're making a bad choice.
I don't think that you're looking out for your future and the best interests of Gutta Barbie.
Everything isn't about Wrizzle. If he really gave a damn, you wouldn't be sitting behind these walls to begin with.
You still have your entire life ahead of you.
It's ok to be selfish to others, but you should never be selfish towards yourself. You deserve to live life to the fullest and experience the best that life has to offer with no regrets.” Tiffany expressed.
“I always idolized you growing up. You were always street smart and wise beyond your years.
You've been about your business since we were younger and have always been on your shit. You were the first one in the hood to open up your own business. The first one to hit a million, and anybody would commend that kind of drive and hustle.”
That shit Tiffany was talking was going in one ear and out the other.
I sat there cleaning my nails while she went on and on, not entertaining a word that came out of her mouth.
In fact, if my man were to know that she was sitting here trying to pressure me into turning on him, he'd have her ass smoked.
I had seen this type of shit happening in movies with the police, but I've never witnessed anyone's lawyer pressing them the way that mine was.
I was growing frustrated. As badly as I wanted to go home, I just couldn't do what she was asking me to do.
I thought about if the roles were reversed, whether Wrizzle would do the same for me.
Would he really ride with me and give up his freedom in exchange for mine?
Most importantly, I found myself wondering if he would be faithful to me, no matter how much time I ended up getting.
Would he ride for me the way that I was willing to ride for him?
I thought about his love for me. I thought about the loyalty he had for me; was it enough?
“Life in prison is a long time. There's going to be other women in and out of his life, drama, plenty of days and nights of him not answering your calls. There are going to be times when life decides that it doesn't have time for you, most days. There's going to be more babies and-
“More babies?” I asked, cutting her off.
“Yes, unfortunately, I see it all the time.
More times than I would like to. From both female and male clients, let me tell you, it's hard.
I've watched men who sat in this same cell, finding out that the woman they love had a child on them; the woman takes it the hardest. But it's very common and happens way more often than you'll believe.” Tiffany shared.
I sat there taking in everything that she had just said. Now I let a lot of shit slide, but there was no way I was giving Wrizzle the option to have more babies on me. What he did when we weren't together wasn't my business, but as long as that was my nigga, having more babies was out of line.
“While you're here doing life, his life will go on. He will have a family, get married and have children.” Tiffany said. It was a hard pill to swallow, but it was reality.
There was no way that he was going to put his life on hold for years while I did time behind bars.
He was going to move on, forget all about me, and grow old with someone else.
I, on the other hand, was going to be on the inside, locked away from the world, caged up like an animal.
It didn't matter that Officer Graham had set him up; her crimes got overlooked because of who she was. I wasn't as privileged.
I knew that if I were smart, I'd sign the papers.
I reached over, grabbing the pen.
“You're doing what's best for you. Trust me when I say this is the best decision. You'll thank me later, and I promise you won't regret it.” Tiffany said.
I was woken out of that horrible nightmare when the hotel door was kicked in and my room was swarmed by police officers.
Wrizzle had stepped out to handle some business, and these motherfuckers had caught me slipping.
The officers pulled me out of the bed with guns drawn on me.
Without remorse they threw me face-first onto the hotel floor.
I lay there not putting up a fight; instead, I complied.
They had me; there was nothing that I could do.
They had the entire block surrounded by a task force and SWAT.
It was over for me. Little did I know that the dream I just had was a message, one that I should've taken heed of, because after that dream, my entire life changed.