TWELVE | FALLEN
“Blaine, please open the door.” I knocked on my sister’s door.
“I’m fine, go away.” Her muffled voice called out from behind the door.
I rested my head against the door and listened to her loud sobs for a few seconds. I hated that her and Kyrie were on the outs, but I was starting to think maybe that shit was for the better. Even though she refused to admit it, I knew she loved him, but I wasn’t sure how he felt about her.
“I’m not going away until you open the door and let me lay eyes on you. Mommy and daddy want to come down and look at you, it’s either me or them.” I called out to her.
I listened as her lock turned and she opened the door to let me in. I sat down on the bed beside her where she was laying on her side turned away from me silently sobbing now.
“What’s wrong?” I rubbed her back softly.
“I fucked up.” Her body trembled. “He hates me.”
“So, what if he hates you, fuck him. He ain’t no damn body, just another nigga?—”
“HE’S NOT JUST ANOTHER NIGGA!!” She turned to face me with tears and snot streaming down her face.
“Okay, he’s not just another nigga...but he is though. I know you love him?—”
“He doesn’t know. I love him so much, Fallen...and he doesn’t know.” She held on to me as she cried.
“Blaine.” I gripped her shoulders. “Take a breath and try to get it together or you’re going to make yourself sick.”
I held her until she was sleep and then I went to work on lunch for us. “Where you at?” Jamar’s voice bounced around the kitchen from my speakerphone.
“Still at home, I can’t just leave my sister. I haven’t seen her like this in a long ass time.” I admitted out loud.
I’d been remembering the days, weeks, and months after Tremaine passed, but she wasn’t this bad then.
Back then she was silent and to herself, but now she was talking to herself while she cried.
She seemed so lost and hurt right now, I didn’t feel right just leaving her so I could take a few spins on my favorite ride.
“Damn, I’m sorry to hear that. Did she tell you why they broke up?”
I’d put bits and pieces together based on Blaine’s mumbles and rants, but she refused to outright tell me what was going on with her and Kyrie. It was no way I could betray her trust and tell Jamar the little bit I did know, plus whatever happened with them seemed to be his brother’s fault.
“You tell me, my sister is the one hurting right now, what did he say happened?”
“He ain’t said shit, he won’t talk about it. He ain’t been home in days, I don’t know what that nigga on.” He replied.
“If he ain’t been home then where is he?” Blaine asked from behind me.
“Oh, shit. I’ma call you back.” I jabbed a finger at the end button and turned around to face my sister. “Hey Blaine, you hungry?”
“I don’t want food; I need to hear his voice...he won’t talk to me.” She said sadly. “Let’s eat. We can talk about Kyrie later.”
“I’m not hungry.” She sat quietly at the bar.
“You gotta eat something, I got soup, sandwiches, pickles, deviled eggs?—”
She reached for a deviled egg, popped it in her mouth and devoured it quickly. Two eggs later she rose from the bar and headed for the fridge.
“Blaine, it’s barely noon and you drinking hard liquor already?”
“I’m a grown ass woman, I can drink whatever I want.” She hissed.
“You right, excuse the fuck out of me for caring.” I raised both hands.
She rolled her eyes but pressed the bottle of C?roc to her lips and guzzled it like water.
“Yo, you serious right now?”
“Oh my God, Fallen! Leave me the fuck alone.” She barked. She grabbed the sandwich and juggled it, the bottle of C?roc, and the jar of pickles and headed to her room slamming the door behind her.
***
“Took yo ass long enough.” Jamar grabbed me and pulled me into his arms the second he opened the door.
“I told you I had to take care of my sister, even though she was being a bitch.” I rolled my eyes as he put my feet on the ground.
“What was she doing?” he laughed as he led me to the living room couch.
A huge smiled covered my face as my eyes took in the pink blanket, the jar of formula, beside a little pink bottle and pacifier. “Oh, I forgot you were in daddy mode last night.”
“Yea, shorty just left about an hour ago.” He nodded.
“Aw, I’m surprised. I never thought your ex would let you keep her overnight without her.”
“Shit me either.” He sighed before sitting down on the couch. “Is Kyrie here?” I sat beside him as I waited for his answer.
“Nah, he texted me last night after the club, but he ain’t slept here in a week or better.”
“He ain’t been at my house, did you ask him?—”
“Fallen, whatever happened or is happening between my brother and yo sister is between them. I know that’s yo sister?—”
“Baby sister.” I corrected him.
“And Kyrie is my baby brother, what’s the difference?” he shrugged.
“It just is. Blaine’s ex was killed in front of her and after that she hasn’t really been open to dating or doing anything and then comes Kyrie filling her head up with all these promises?—”
“That don’t even sound like my brother. I ain’t trying to argue about them, I’m just saying they both grown so let they grown asses figure it out.” He cut me off.
“For now.” I rolled my eyes.
“Nah, not just for now, for good.” He lifted my hand from my lap and brought it to his lips, kissing it before he pulled me over to his lap. “Bring yo hardheaded ass over here.”
Our lips connected and within seconds I was straddling his lap ready to take my clothes off for him, but he stopped me.
“What? What’s wrong?” I searched his eyes.
“Come on, cause after I nut a nigga need a nap.” He told me as he tapped my thigh motioning for me to get up.
A few hours later my eyes popped open hearing someone pounding on the door.
“Jamar.” I spoke softly to his back as he eased out of the bed.
He grabbed his gun from the dresser as he passed it and suddenly my throat went dry.
I could never be afraid around Jamar but seeing him grab his gun made me nervous and when I heard the front door open, but nothing else knots turned my stomach inside out.
I threw one of his t-shirts on and headed down the stairs behind him.
When I reached the bottom of the stairs I heard Jamar and his ex-talking.
“I’ma say this shit for the last time, you don’t own me, aight? Whatever I do in my own time is my own damn business. I keep saying the same shit to you, but you missing it, yo.” He fumed.
“I’m just saying?—”
“You just saying what? I appeased yo ass when I agreed to let yo ass spend the night, but you taking shit too far. You can’t be popping up at my spot when you want to, that shit ain’t cool.” He explained.
“I forgot my scarf and needed to come get it, but you sure didn’t waste no time inviting your little girlfriend over there.”
“I can do whatever the fuck I want, if I asked her to come over while yo ass was here I could. I’m not about to keep doing this shit with you, the more I do for you the more yo ass try to take advantage.”
“What?”
“The first thing you said when you walked in was a comment about my girlfriend, you could have texted me asked me about yo damn scarf. Hell, you passed three or four different stores on yo way over here?—”
“Your fucking daughter is in the car! What did you want me to do?”
“I don’t know? Figure it the fuck out, and you in here fussing with me about my damn daughter and she outside by herself, you got me fucked up.” He barked.
Their conversation carried on outside, so I hurriedly went back upstairs and put my clothes back on. By the time I was slipping my shoes on and reaching for my keys Jamar was stepping back inside holding the car seat with his daughter tucked inside.
“Hey, I’ma go head and go.” I told him lifting my keys from the table.
Jamar set the car seat down on the couch and reached for the keys in my hand as I passed him.
“Hold up, you ain’t gotta go nowhere, I actually want you to stay.”
“Jamar, you know her mama ain’t feeling that and I don’t want to cause no waves.” I told him honestly.
I hated the situation with Jamar and his ex, but the fact that he felt he had to lie to me showed me where we stood.
“You not. I want you here.” He replied ignoring the rapid knocks coming from the other side of the locked door. My eyes shifted to the door before switching back to him when his daughter fossed lightly.
“It’s okay, Jamar. Having a relationship with me shouldn’t come in between you and her mother?—”
“Oh, that’s what this is? We in a relationship now? Cause I can’t tell, one minute you pushing me away and the next...” His words trailed off at the consistent knocking at the door. He exhaled, unlocked and opened the door allowing his ex to step inside.
“Jamar, give me my baby back, I don’t care what you got going on with yo little hoe.
” His ex-ranted. She wasn’t an ugly girl, but I knew that already from her social media accounts.
Dressed in leggings, a black V-neck, and a pair of two strap sandals her curvy body clearly was snapping back to her pre-pregnancy size.
Her long braids swept at her ass with each step she took until she was standing on the other side of Jamar and reaching for Gabriella.
“Aight, Ebony. I’m trying to be a good father, but I ain’t gon’ keep fighting you to be in her life. I don’t want to miss a minute with her, but I ain’t gon be doing this with you
all the time. You want to make sure my girlfriend ain’t gon’ hurt our daughter, she right here. You got something you want to ask her, ask way, shit she standing right here.” He nodded at me as he stared into my eyes freezing me in place.
“Fuck you.” She rolled her eyes as she grabbed the car seat from the couch and hurried out the door completely ignoring me.
“Sorry about that shit.” He scratched his curly fade and leaned against the back of the couch.
“You sorry for lying too?”
“I should have told you about her being here, my fault. You see the silly shit I gotta deal with though, right?” he nodded towards the now closed door.
“I get it, she’s dramatic, but I got to be able to trust what you tell me, and I can’t do that if you lie to me.”
A small smile covered his face, “Come here.”
“No, cause if I come over there you gon try to fuck me.” I giggled.
“I ain’t about to try shit, I’m definitely doing that shit.
” He approached me backing me up to the door until I couldn’t move.
“I hear you and I appreciate you for understanding how I feel about my daughter. I keep telling myself I’ma fall back from you until you stop pushing me away, but I can’t.
Stop pushing me away, you need more than dick and I know that shit cause I need more than pussy—” His words were cut off by the
rapid knock of someone at the door. He exhaled loudly before he snatched the door opened and in stormed Blaine.
“WHERE THE FUCK IS HE?” She slurred.
“What the fuck Blaine?” I stepped in front of her and wafted the smell of alcohol away from my face. “I know you didn’t drive all the way over here.”
“WHERE IS HE?” She screamed.
“Kyrie ain’t here, what the fuck? Come on, let’s get you home.” I pulled at her elbow, but she snatched away from my angrily. “Hell no! He killed my friend, he killed her!” she sobbed. I grabbed my sister and held her against my chest as she sobbed deeply.
“Blaine, stop crying, please what are you talking about?” I asked.
“Kourtney, the police called and told me she’s dead, they found her body this morning, stuffed in a fucking garbage can.”
“Oh, my god!” I covered my mouth in shock. “I’m so sorry.” I hugged her again until I heard Kyrie’s voice from the doorway.
“What the fuck y’all got going on in here?”