Chapter Where are they?
DIO
I knew when I saw Samara’s text telling me to come home, she had seen the video. Although I didn’t do anything, I still felt the need to explain. After coming back from the Dead Zone, I waited an extra hour before sneaking off campus.
When I got to the apartments, I hurried and jogged to the door. It felt weird standing here because the last time I was here, it didn’t end well. Instead of using my key, I knocked. When she opened the door, I saw the car seats but didn’t see the twins.
“Where are they?”
“They’re in the spare room sleeping.”
I stepped inside and stood there awkwardly like I didn’t use to walk around this muhfucka butt naked. Like I hadn’t had Mars bent over the couches that were beside me. It was as if all this was new to me.
Samara crossed her arms over her chest. “I know you’re not supposed to be here, and I won’t keep you long, but I need to know where we stand.”
I ran my hand over my waves. “Is that even a question? What type of nigga you think I am, Samara?”
“Answer the question, Dionysus.”
I shook my head. “We are what we have always been.”
She tossed her hand up. “I drove over three hours for answers. I need to know that there is light at the end of the fucking tunnel. I saw the video, Dio, but it’s not the video that bothered me.
What bothered me is the idea of the man who is supposed to be for me moving on and giving my happiness to someone else. ”
I placed prayer hands to my lips. “That’s the fucking problem. You say you know me, right? You say you love me, but your actions and your thoughts say otherwise. I’ve told you time and time again what I feel for you, and I’m not about to keep wasting my fucking breath repeating the shit!”
Samara’s eyes widened. “I want you to repeat it over and over again!” she shouted.
“I need to fucking know every day that your love hasn’t changed.
I need to know that my best fucking friend is there until the fucking end.
It’s not the pledging. It’s not the being a better man. What I’m asking for is a resolution.”
I moved closer to her. “Samara, I never went anywhere. Okay, so we got into an argument and shit got bad, but we needed that. All that did was spark a flame in me that confirmed that I never want to lose you. What we have is on pause for now, but it doesn’t change how I feel for you.
Trust me, it’ll all be worth it in the end,” I said as I took her hand into mine and placed it to my heart.
“This shit is yours and no one else’s. Just hold on, baby, please. ”
She had a nigga begging, and that had never been me. I knew she was trying to be patient, and I respected her for it, but whatever I needed to say to not lose her, I would.
“I was offered a chance to travel abroad for the summer.”
I let her hand go. “What does that mean?”
“It means if I accept the offer, I will be gone until the fall semester.”
A nigga felt sick. She’s trying to leave me was all I heard. Is this payback for joining the frat?
“Is that why you came back? To check my temp to decide what you would do? You question my love for you on some shit you probably already decided on?”
She pulled her eyes away.
“Fuck no! Look at me!” I barked.
Eyes on me.
I blew out a sharp breath. “What do you want to do, Samara?” I asked because I wanted to be understanding.
“The opportunity sounds great, and I’m happy for you, but this has nothing to do with us.
This has everything to do with your confusion about your future.
If you want to travel and study abroad, fine.
You do what makes you happy. However, don’t use me as the reason you choose to go or not,” I explained.
Tears welled in her eyes. Seeing that was fucking me up.
I pulled her in for a hug. I knew coming into my world probably changed a lot for her.
I couldn’t be the nigga to stop her shine, no matter how selfish I wanted to be.
If it were my choice, I would keep her ass locked away like Rapunzel just to keep her safe and to myself.
However, I knew a part of growing up was letting her spread her wings and knowing she would always ride for a nigga. I kissed her forehead.
“I love you. That will never change, and as bad as I want to be like fuck no, as your best friend, I think you should go,” I told her.
She looked up at me in tears. I kissed each one that fell. “Stop crying. You’re Chevy tough. You should go and—” I paused, “—so should I before they see I’m missing.”
She gripped me tightly. “Dio, don’t leave, please,” she cried.
I leaned down and kissed her lips so softly. “I love you, Mars the fucking Star,” I mumbled in her mouth.
I forced myself to pull away and walk out the door. A tear slipped from my eye as I made my way back to my ride. I knew there was only one thing left before I lost my best fucking friend completely.