6
Adrian
I stole another lookat my special passenger as she lounged next to me, her curls bouncing in the wind on the high-speed boat. The power of the engine pumped gallons of my blood at the same speed the boat skimmed the surface of the ocean.
Nina’s eyes were glued to the waning lights of the houses we’d left behind on Skyford Cay. I took us out to open water first, so she could get a wide sea view of the homes on the waterfront. The boat dock got smaller the further we went out.
This was a short trip. I had promised to get her back before Chef Dominique, whom we’d christened “the dragon” yesterday, noticed her absence from the kitchen. I moved the throttle and shifted into higher gear when I remembered that my parents and everyone related to the party and staying at the house would be coming in today.
The jolt from the increase in speed spilled Nina out of her seat and I heard the thud above the noise of the engine. The wind and the waves lashed the hull of the boat. I scrambled to shut off the engine so I could attend to her.
Dazed from the surprise, she looked up as I bent to help her stand. As we both rose, the boat tipped with the waves and I cradled her to my body without thinking.
The rush of energy from the strong feelings of wanting forever to hold her was so startling I wanted to release her like my hand had touched a hot stovetop.
However, the gentleman in me had to check to make sure she was okay.
“Are you all right, Nina,” I asked in a rapid-fire burst of words. “You scared me for a moment,” I said, soothing a finger down her small plump cheek. I watched as her eyes grew softer and brighter into orbs of liquid heat. She lifted one finger to trail along my lips.
With the sun rising over the ocean, Nina’s soft touch on my lips, tracing back and forth, lit a fire in me. A fire to replace her finger with her lips pressed against mine until they unfurled to give me access to her sweetness. The curve of her lips, the fullness. The extra thick defining line along the outside of her upper lip made me want to pay special homage to it. They are like Aimee’s.
“Ah.” I broke the spell between us. “Can you sit so we can head back?”
“I don’t know what happened. One moment I was enjoying the ride and the next I’m thrown off my seat.”
“It’s all my fault,” I muttered. She rubbed a spot on her back and eased back into the seat. “Does anywhere ache, so I can check?”
“Check? Are you a doctor?” she asked, and I didn’t miss the teasing in her voice. It was like that between us, cool and comfortable. We’d talked with humor. We’d laughed at our sarcastic banter. We’d shared some of our private thoughts, our dreams, our hopes. All of it rolled into a ball of burning desire.
“No I am not a doctor, but I want to make sure you’re okay before I get this bad boy turned around to head back to the house.”
With her silent acquiescence, I turned the boat around to head back to the house. Nina’s smile, her lean into the wind, her squint against the wind and the rising sun—I could look at them all day. But I had a boat to steer safely to shore.
I wished I could’ve steered the boat further offshore and around the island—it would’ve allowed Nina to get a good perspective of her island home from the sea. Maybe next time we could take the yacht out, which would be infinitely better. I could spend the time actually talking to her rather than fighting to maneuver the boat. Having her on board with me wasn’t enough. I couldn’t talk, couldn’t touch—I couldn’t connect with her.
Ten minutes later I pulled up to the dock and Captain Tony and his team waited with the ropes to help me get the speedboat secured. We did and then I helped Nina get onto the dock landing with her red flip-flops, to complement her red shorts and a white t-shirt.
“How many flip flops do you own?” I asked, unable to keep the teasing from my voice.
“A gazillion,” she responded laughing.
“I love your honesty,” I replied. “Did you enjoy the ride?”
“I sure did. First time in a speedboat. It was exhilarating. The wind on my face sure woke me fully. Better than my favorite coffee in the mornings.”
“Would you like to do it again tomorrow morning?” I asked, my voice quavering with hope.
“Tomorrow morning is out of the question. I am starting on my design work today. And tomorrow will be the crucial day where I’ll be putting on all the finishing touches and putting the desserts together starting way before the sun comes up.” She stated it in a tone that said, I have things to do other than play.
“Don’t you have to sleep, take a break, catch your breath?” That sounded like desperate pleading, even to me.
“Not when there is a looming deadline. Not when there are fifty perfect gavels to make, fifty legal scales to make, fifty roses to make. They have to be painted and assembled flawlessly. Art takes time. Perfection takes time.” The burning in her eyes now was different than when I had her pressed against me on the boat. They were still bright with heat, but I could see fatigue there now.
“I am disappointed that my mother’s minute details required for this intimate party are taking up all your time—time I want for myself.”
“Adrian, Adrian,” she said and took my hands into her soft skilled hands. “Look at me,” she murmured, trembling. “Why are we spending all this time together?”
“Because I like you,” I responded, my heart was racing, pounding in my ears again.
I watched her eyes cloud over at my response.
“What? The feeling isn’t mutual? Don’t you feel our connection, Nina? Tell me you feel it too,” I said. I didn’t care if I was begging.
“I have enjoyed our encounters. Our swim meet. Our Crossfit challenge in the sand. Our lunch yesterday. But you must see the impossibility.”
“Why?” I asked, breathless.
“You ask why Adrian? You are here for a party at which, by your admission, you are expected to choose a wife from the illustrious guests who will be paraded past you. I am the pastry chef. The hired help. The girl from the other side of the tracks,” she declared, her words uttered in a low rush.
“You remind me so much of her.”
“Who is her?”
“Aimee.”
“Who and where is Aimee?” she demanded, her voice rising on the last word.
“Aimee, my college love. She was from Dominica.”
“Say no more, I get the clear picture. Of course, Aimee is nowhere to be seen, which is the same place I’ll end up. Nowhere to be seen, based on what you have told me so far,” she growled in a rush like Niagara falls.
Was she wrong? Was this another Aimee? Was I still too weak to make myself vulnerable? Too weak to defy my parents, to walk away from the vision of my life I’d created in my mind?
“Nina,” I said, squeezing her hands. We were standing in the middle of the planked dock. The waves gently lapped at the pilings of the dock. The boats bobbed to the rhythm of the waves. The air was heavy with the fresh scent of sea life and the saltiness of the ocean.
“I want to keep spending time with you. I want to explore our connection. It feels right. I want to stay in your presence and never leave. I want to talk to you from sunrise to sunset. The greatest desire in me now is to take you out on the yacht, to another cay, just the two of us, under a tree, to pour out my heart, my longings, my desires, my dreams—and to hear yours. Don’t you feel the same way?” I asked in almost a whisper—so low, I could barely hear it above the shhz, shhz, shhz of the lashing waves.
Her lips trembled. Clouds of doubt swept over the surface of her eyes. They narrowed slightly. I didn”t take my gaze away because I didn’t want to miss any of the emotion they would reflect to me.
“Adrian, Adrian, you know and I know this is impossible. What I want matters not. No matter how strongly I want it. That was a nice vision you painted. But it’s a vision,” she said, crisp and clear.
“Nina, are you eliminating our chance before we have even begun. Don’t you feel it? Don’t you want to take chances? Don’t you want to let go of hang-ups and biases and prejudices?”
“These are strong words you use,” she said, trembling with uncertainty. She took her hands away and turned to face the vast stirring ocean that seemed to be growing between us.
“Yes, they are words for me, as they are for you.”
“True.”
I took her hands again and pulled her back to me. “Nina, look into my eyes and tell me you feel nothing for me. Tell me you don’t want to spend more time with me, that you don’t feel this live connection between us.”
Her brown eyes locked into my blue eyes, softened, then brightened and glowed with low heat. For a long time, we stood on the boat dock. The daylight slowly infusing the sky with a brilliant slash of orange, the waves giving sweet musical accompaniment. The salt hovered in the air surrounding us.
In that atmosphere, Nina asked me some hard questions. Questions I’d asked myself a million times before with Aimee and I would have to ask myself a gazillion more times to come.
“Are you willing to give up any of your legacy responsibilities? Your established family tradition? Your dreams for the foundations you wish to create? Are you willing to defy your grandfather and your parents? Do you see me fitting into your plans?” She punctuated each question with a search of my face, to see the answer there. She turned back toward me. So close to me. She smelled of salt, cherry blossoms, and vanilla.
I leaned closer to her, never taking my eyes off hers. Their warmth caused a low heat to traverse my neck and a single line of sweat to trickle down my back.
“I don’t want you to answer any of these questions now, because they are hard questions. Think about them, Adrian. Think about whether you want to cavort with the help.”
“But . . .” She cut me off by placing her finger against my lips.
“No buts. Think, Adrian. Think.”
And before I could react, she took off at a run in her red flip flops along the dock, down the garden path leading to her apartment.
I stayed glued to the spot, watching her leave me. I looked out upon the waters searching the azure shades, the light teal, and the deep blues hoping they would give me the answers to the hard questions. In a few hours, everyone for the party would be here and I would have to fall into line.