Chapter 16
Pregnancy Journal Entry
12 weeks pregnant
Weight: 120 lbs.
Cravings: Tacos… tons and tons of tacos.
Finally, I’m able to eat again. The first few weeks, knowing I was pregnant with you, were rough. Okay, the weeks not knowing I was pregnant with you were also rough, but we’ll try not to think about that too much. Let’s face it, I was in denial that I was even pregnant. Well, that and the fact that when I did come to terms with the fact I was carrying your precious little life inside me, I had to accept that I’d be doing this all on my own.
If you’ve guessed that your father isn’t in your life, you’d guess right. However, you should know it has nothing to do with you. It has everything to do with me and the fact that I had yet to even tell him you’re a thing.
Your mom is a COWARD.
That’s right, I said it. I’m a big, fat coward who can’t even tell your father you exist. I mean that could have everything to do with the fact he’s expecting a baby with another woman. Yeah, I forgot to mention that. You have a half-sibling who will be born a few months before you.
Nonetheless, that’s my issue. Not yours and maybe one day, I’ll situate that all out, but for now, it’s just me and you, little bean. Every day, I feel my body change, and every day, I fall in love with you even more.
I just hope that I can be a good mommy to you.
Until we meet.
Love you Always,
Your Mama