Chapter 22
Sugar
“When was the last time you checked on Gunner?” Suki asked.
“An hour ago.” Sugar refolded the same towel for a third time. “He’s still sound asleep. Can’t say I’m surprised. He literally fucked us into a coma yesterday.”
“That was absolutely delightful. Something we all needed after—” Suki whimpered. “Anyway, we should all be asleep.” He folded a fitted sheet into a crisp rectangle. “Why are we doing laundry at midnight?”
“I know why I’m awake, but why are you?” Sugar knew the cause of his insomnia: heart-wrenching, soul-crushing guilt.
“We’re Humerians. When one of us is up, we all are.” He balled up a pillowcase and chucked it at Sugar. “Go to bed, you monster!”
Sugar gave his friend a pointed glare. “You can’t blame everything on being Humerian. What’s really keeping you from sleeping?”
“Horrific nightmares.”
“Would you like to talk about them?”
“Absolutely not.” Suki inspected a pristine bedsheet. “This one’s going back in the dirty pile. There’s a speck of blood.”
“No, there isn’t.” Sugar stuffed the sheet back inside the basket of clean laundry. He took Suki by the hand and led him down the hall to the bar. “Sit. We’ll have wine.”
“A lot of wine.” Suki perched on a bar stool.
Sugar filled two flutes with prosecco and added a pink sugar cube to each glass. He took one and slid the other to his friend. “Shall we toast?”
“Toasts are for celebrations.”
“We’re celebrating that we’re not preparing for a funeral.” Suki burst into tears. “Oh no, I’m sorry.” Sugar dabbed at Suki’s cheeks with a napkin. “Forgive me.”
“No need. You were trying to lighten the moment.” Suki picked up his glass. “To life.”
“To life.” The clinking sound made Sugar smile. “And Gunner has been extremely lively, to say the least. A good sign that he’s almost completely healed.”
Suki opened his shirt. “Look. My nipples are hard just thinking about the way he fucked me. Like a pro.”
Sugar licked his thumb and rubbed it over Suki’s left tit, just to see him smile.
“Mmm, give it a bite.”
“If I do that, you’ll want me to finish you off, and I’m absolutely exhausted.”
Suki drained his glass and tapped the bottom until the sugar cube fell into his mouth. He stared Sugar down while he crunched.
“Lover, if you really need it, I’ll try.”
“I always want your ass, but we need to talk.”
“Fair enough.” Sugar poured Suki a refill. “You start.”
“What happened to Gunner and Snake was horrible, no question. But—I don’t know how to word this without sounding like a bitch—"
“Being a bitch is your deal. Just say it.”
“You’re acting like a crazy person. What is going on?”
Sugar pushed his prosecco aside. “Can you blame me? I had to flush dirt out of Gunner’s trachea before I could stitch it back together.
And then Snake crawled back with a knife skewered through his face?
” His voice cracked. “I’m medically trained, but no one prepared me for that!
” He rested his forehead on the cool bar top and willed the room to stop spinning.
“I’ll never get over it, either. The smell of blood made a home inside my olfactory system.” He petted Sugar’s hair. “My point is, everyone is traumatized by what happened and is acting accordingly. Except you. Something else is going on, and I think I know what it is.”
Sugar slowly lifted his head, but if Suki knew the truth, his expression masked it. “What do you think has me so rattled?”
“Hello? Snake declared his love for Horatio, right in your bed. And when you confronted him, he accused you of making it all up. So, unless you’re not telling me something, that shit never got resolved.”
“When Horatio came back, my first instinct was to rip off his balls. But then, I saw him with Gunner.” Sugar took a sip of wine. “More importantly, Snake saw Horatio with Gunner, and it did not faze him a bit.”
“That’s a good point. Slayer has it bad for that little cutie, and he’s not subtle about it.”
“Exactly. So, if Snake is really in love with him, why isn’t he filled with the same murderous rage I was when he picked Horatio over me?”
“Another good point. This is confusing as fuck.”
The weight of Sugar’s guilt forced a slump in his shoulders. Limbs leaden, he came around the bar and sat next to Suki. “There is something else, but before I tell you, I need you to promise me something.”
“Name it.” Suki extended his pinky finger.
Sugar wrapped his pinky around Suki’s and wished they were fourteen again, when things were simpler and a broken heart could be mended with a few French kisses. “No matter what I tell you, I need you to promise you’ll always love me.”
“Aw, baby, I’d love you even if you slaughtered my entire stupid family with a machete.” Suki smirked. “Yes. Bad example. But, pinky promise, I will love you for eternity.”
Eyes burning, he wrapped Suki’s hand in both of his. “What happened to Gunner and Snake,” the words raked his throat like razor blades, “was my fault.”
“You’re being ridiculous. How is any of that your fault?”
“Ormond’s been texting me for years. All this time, I never replied, but I never blocked him, either.” He sniffled. “Sometimes, the things he said—” He bit his lip, furious with himself for needing anything from Ormond.
Suki leaned in, face stricken. “What things?”
Forcing his fingers to work, Sugar pulled up the messages and passed his phone to Suki. “Read for yourself.”
Suki read the text aloud, doing a near-perfect imitation of Ormond’s simpering tone. “Sugar, my love, my universe, I think of you all day and dream of you all night. You’re the shining star of my life…” He made a gagging sound.
“Scroll down to the last one.”
“Holy crap, how many are there?” Suki’s finger was a blur. “Okay, this is it, the one from… two weeks ago?” He groaned. “All this time and you never told me? What the fuck, Sugar, we tell each other everything!”
“Read it and I’ll explain.”
“Sugar, no one has ever fucked me the way you did. Hard and forceful, I loved the way you made me your bitch. I long—NO—I NEED you to own me again! I NEED you to tie me down and take me hard.” Suki slammed the phone down as if it burned. “Yeah, I get it. That text is like catnip to men like us.”
Shame leaked from every pore. “I didn’t just read it. I called him.” Sugar rubbed his face, hard enough to sting. “And made a date.”
“Shut the fuck up.”
Sugar laughed, a dead sound that hurt his chest. “I met him in Merona at a swanky private club.” He let out a mournful cry. “And then, I fucked him.”
He expected Suki to throw his glass, scream, or slap him across the face. Instead, he pulled Sugar onto his lap.
“Baby. It’s understandable.” Suki’s voice was thick. “You needed someone to make you feel special. That’s not a crime.”
“But I made a selfish choice, and Gunner and Snake almost died.”
“You chose to take a chance on happiness with someone who betrayed your trust! That’s no reflection on you, Sugar. That’s all on Ormond. If anyone made a selfish choice, it was him.”
Sugar broke.
Pressing his face into Suki’s chest, he cried—gigantic, choking sobs that rattled his bones and left him weak. Suki didn’t try to fix him. He just held on while Sugar fell apart in his arms. When he finally went limp from exhaustion, Suki held even tighter.
“I should have known better,” Sugar rasped.
“Yeah.” Suki snorted. “And I should’ve known better than to blow my algebra professor in his office without locking the door. But so what? We’re messy bitches, and we still kick ass.”
Sugar huffed a broken laugh against Suki’s collarbone. “You’re my person.”
“And you’re mine.”
Suki tipped Sugar’s head up and kissed him until he stopped trembling. This was their friendship in a nutshell: feisty back-and-forth, heartfelt advice, and dirty, hot sex. But sometimes, they just kissed, and Sugar loved that most of all.
“I have to tell Snake about Ormond,” he sighed into Suki’s neck.
“Why the fuck would you tell that emotionally stunted vampire the truth about anything?” Suki growled.
“I expect honesty from him. I have to give it, too.”
“You deserve better. You deserve someone as special as you are, Sugar.”
“We need to find you someone special. Someone you can tie up and fuck for hours.”
Suki rested his head on top of Sugar’s. “The first time I laid eyes on Horatio, I wanted him to be my someone special. What an absolute god that man is. Honestly, I’ve never met anyone so fucking attractive. It’s annoying.”
“I hoped it would work out for you two, but I knew it wouldn’t. He’s not your type.” Sugar frowned. “Actually, who is?”
“Someone who’ll worship me and obey my every command, but also challenge me on an intellectual level. Like, a smart fuck toy.” Suki groaned. “But back to you. Snake’s been an asshole for decades. Tell me again why you won’t leave him.”
Sugar pinched Suki’s tit. “Little bitch. You know why!”
“Your addiction to the Umberto? Please. Snake might be one of the most gorgeous creatures who ever drew breath, but he can be replaced by a long cucumber. Just as satisfying, and when you’re done, you can make salad.”
Sugar laughed until tears wet his cheeks. “I adore you.”
“I know.” He brushed away Sugar’s tears. “Could you leave his Umberto behind?”
Snake had what was known by Humerians as the Umberto: a dick long enough to reach the extra pleasure spot they all possessed. Located deep inside the back passage, stimulating the area produced an orgasm ten times stronger than normal.
Who wouldn’t be addicted to that?
“The Umberto is a big draw, but it’s more than that. The man can set my dick on fire with a glance. He’s unpredictable—I never know what to expect. Sometimes he’ll push me up against a wall, tongue-fuck my mouth, and then just… walk away.” Sugar whimpered. “He can leave me wrecked in the best way.”
“And other times he could freeze ice. The man is a walking contradiction. His mood swings must give you whiplash."
“Maybe he has a split personality. One cruel and calculating, the other sweet and affectionate, especially right after sex. How can he be that way in bed but so cold-hearted the rest of the time?”
“Or maybe the uncaring bastard act is only that—an act. He gets something out of it. Or he gets off on it.”
“No one can fool me with an act.”
“Love is blind, so they say.”
Sugar held Suki tighter. Was he really a sap where Snake was concerned? “I don’t know myself anymore. Who am I, Suki?”
“You’re Sugar Constantine. Weapons expert. Former arms dealer. The second in command of the most infamous pirate crew in the universe. Without you, Snake would still be living in a vermin-infested dinghy. You don’t need him. He needs you. Know your worth.”
“Thank you, bestie. I needed to hear that.”
Suki nuzzled Sugar’s neck. “Did I ever tell you about the time Slayer let me handcuff him to my bed? I made him call me Daddy. It was a great time.”
“Tell me while you fuck me outside, under the stars and the moon, and maybe Snake’s eyes if he peeks out the window.”
“How about we do it in your bed and let him join in?”
Sugar snorted. “Does he deserve both of us at the same time?”
“Not really, but he did save Gunner, after all.”
“Fine, but I get the Umberto first.”