Chapter 3 #2
“Honestly?” He nodded. “After the year I’ve had… I think I believe in Santa Claus more than I believe my uncle actually wants to retire and hand over the place.” I sighed, running my fingers through my hair and swallowing. “Part of me thinks...”
“What?”
“That maybe he’s hoping one of my cousins will change their mind and come back to run the place. Keep it in the family.”
“Keep it in the…” His brows bunched. “Candy, you are his family.”
“You know what I mean.” I tried to slide out of his hold, but he didn’t let me.
He simply held me in place, not that I tried all that hard as I shook my head.
“I just mean… you know, one of his actual kids, not just the niece he got stuck with after—“ The words died on my tongue when his fingers caressed the end of my chin gently, lifting my head and making me realize I’d been looking away from him.
“He loves you like you’re one of his own.
” I opened my mouth to argue, but he shot me a look that made me know better than to do that.
“You’re talented with your hands, Candy.
Shit, there is no way anyone I know could do even a fourth of a good job than what you’ve done.
And in three days. We’re basically done because of you a lot earlier than anyone guessed we could be,” he complimented. My throat clogged up again.
“You’re just saying that.” I swallowed away the need to rest the tips of my fingers against his hard chest and push up on the tips of my toes to brush my lips against his. What would his mouth feel against mine? What would kissing Onyx ‘s kiss be like?
“You shouldn’t look at me like that.” His warning sounded magnificently raspy. My nipples stood at attention against the plain red sports bra I wore under my shirt. I forced myself to blink.
“Like what?” I asked in a breathy tone I hardly recognized. My body felt like it was lit from the inside out and yet slightly chilly.
“Like you want me to pick you up and place you on the edge of my worktable and kiss you until we both forget our names.”
“Oh… wow.” I licked my suddenly dry lips and heard the deep groan that escaped from him. He stepped closer and caressed my cheek a little firmer.
“Fuck, you’re beautiful.”
“I am?” I asked, swaying closer to him. His dark eyes beckoned me closer and closer. The idea of him lifting me up and setting me on the table flashed through my head, then a different idea popped up in my head. Sitting on his lap. Naked.
“Most beautiful woman ever.” God, it was so easy to let myself get lost in his grip.
“What are… what are you doing? I mean—“ I swallowed hard and tried to focus. “What’s going on here?” It felt like I’d stepped into the best Twilight Zone episode ever made.
“What’s happening is what should have happened four months ago,” he said, leaning his head forward and dipping it just enough for our foreheads to touch.
“Onyx…” My lips parted, and my chest rose and fell, scraping against his. When did we get so close?
“About thirty seconds ago,” he answered, making me realize I’d said my thought out loud.
“Wait. Four months ago?” My brows bunched, and my face went blank. Was he saying this should have happened the night I heard him I was too big to date?
“Don’t do that.”
“Do what?”
“Shut down like that. I know you heard me that night.”
“Heard what?” I asked, pulling away, not that Onyx let me go far.
“Be the biggest lying asshole in the world,” he stated like law. I blinked. It was nice that he was taking credit, but I had an itch to push him further.
“How?” I pressed further. But instead of looking annoyed with me, he pulled me back into his arms and dipped his head and dragged his nose against mine.
I pressed fully, expecting him to get annoyed of frustrated with me. But instead, he stepped forward and latched his hand with mine, his long, calloused fingers tangled with mine.
“I shoved my fucking foot, boot and all, in my mouth that night, and it feels like I haven’t been able to pull it out completely since.” I blinked as my brain slowly processed his words.
“Onyx.”
“The guy I was talking to had been eyeing you. Checking you out,” he started to explain.
“Yeah, right, the guy was—“
“And when he started asking me about you, I’ll admit, I wanted to fucking punch him.”
“Because he was interested in me?” My lips twitched, but then I felt myself get serious as things started to fall into place.
“I’ve known him for a while. He’s an okay guy but not the kind of man who deserves a chance with you. He’s a player. All he usually wants is to hook up.” As protective as I wanted to believe he was trying to be, there was something about the whole thing I really didn’t like.
“So, you insulted me to get him to lose interest?” I shook his hand out of mine and stepped back, crossing my arms over my chest.
“Yeah,” he admitted. “It was the stupidest, most regretful thing I’ve ever done in my life, Candy.
That’s not the kind of man I am, and I’m not really sure why I did that.
Fuck, I’d kick a guy’s ass for even thinking of treating one of my sisters that way.
I regretted it the moment the words slipped out, and when I turned around, I knew you’d heard me. ”
“But then you let me believe it? For months?” He scratched his scruffy square jaw.
“I did. I had my reasons, snowflake.” He stood straight, as if bracing for my reaction. “The next day, I walked into the hardware store, thinking I’d focus on my house instead of the way I woke up reaching for you that morning, and boom! There you were.”
“Well, sorry to inconvenience you!” I half-shouted, stepping away further, but I wasn’t stupid. I knew if he wanted to, he could crowd me before I’d blink. The distance was an illusion, if the way he was looking at me was anything to go by.
“What were your reasons? To letting me think…”
“I’m not good enough for you.”
“Oh, please.” I rolled my eyes, and a muscle under his jaw twitched. “Don’t give me that. That’s just the nicer way of saying it’s not me, it’s you when—”
“Jesus Christ,” he growled, and just like I knew he could, he rushed me. One moment, we were almost completely across from one another, and the next, I was in his arms, my head tipped back, looking into his bottomless dark gaze.
“You deserve someone who will give you what you need when you need it. My life is about the brewery, and the thought of starting something with you and not having time to give it to you kills me. Not to mention the fact I’m a hell of a lot older than you.”
“You’re only eight years—”
“Shut it, snowflake,” he muttered, dragging the pad of his thick thumb across my bottom lip.
“You deserve a man who could lay the world at your feet, and I hardly have ten minutes of time to paint my damn kitchen. But for you. I’ve done it four times now.
” My lips twitched. “Once a month, gorgeous, I go in there and order paint. From you. I redo my kitchen all the while thinking about you. Dreaming about you. Jerking myself raw knowing I shouldn’t, but fuck me, I can’t get myself to stop. ”
“That sounds… like a problem.”
“You have no idea,” he clipped, dragging in a deep breath. “I’m really sorry about what I said. And I hate that I let you think that’s how I felt about you when it wasn’t even close to the truth. I fucked up, Candy. I was trying to protect you from him and from myself.”
I opened my mouth to tell him it was okay and thank him for his apology, but he kept talking, “But the last time I was heading to the store to get more paint?” I stilled, slightly melting into his embrace.
“You came to me. You let me be there for you, and fuck me,” he rasped, his forehead lightly touching mine, “I want to be that man for you. For the rest of my goddamn life.”
“Onyx—“
“Don’t say no. Don’t say anything but that you’ll come to my place and let me cook for you.”
“On—“
“Please. I’ll make us a late breakfast.” He glanced over at the huge clock he had on the wall. “I’ll make you a hot chocolate. Extra marshmallows. Just the way you like it.”
“How do you—“
“I pay attention. I might have been trying to fight off what I feel for you these last couple of months, but I still paid attention.”
“To the way I drink hot chocolate.”
“To everything you do.”
“But… that’s crazy. I mean, how would you even know this?”
“Snowflake, you’re the only person on the face of this earth who drinks hot chocolate in the middle of a heat wave.” I felt my face heat up. He really had been watching me the way Lola swore he did.
“Let’s go eat.” He tugged on my hand, but I didn’t go with him.
I had no idea why I was resisting going back to his place.
How long had I been dying to go in there and see what he’d done with it?
To check out if the kitchen would look as good as I thought it would with the glitter in that warm shade of white in the early morning light?
“The candy canes aren’t done,” I mildly argued, but we both knew it was just an excuse.
“We can finish after.”
“What about having to take the stuff to the brewery? Shouldn’t you—“
“Austin and Bash are in charge of that.” I knew that already.
“Then you have to dress up as Santa next week?” I asked, trying to give myself some more time even though I’d overheard them talking the first day we got to work. I hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, but the shouting had been hard to miss when they were right by me.
“Yes,” he said.
“Look, Onyx, I appreciate your apology and completely accept it. I just don’t think…” He caught my wrist and tangled our fingers together. I almost gave myself whiplash with how fast my head bent to look at his thick, tanned fingers tangled with my much lighter ones.
“Don’t think. Just say yes.”
“Why?” I asked. “I mean, you should rest up. The toy drive starts tomorrow, and you probably have a lot on your plate, and then you have to dress up next week and—“