Chapter 12
Chapter Twelve
Violet accepted the drink that Beth had mixed up for her. Violet hadn’t ever been a big drinker, but Beth’s PixieCider was delicious. And the name made her giggle every time Beth said it.
“Violet, how is being a nanny for Speedy going?” Frankie asked, accepting another drink from Beth.
At least Violet wasn’t drinking alone tonight. She had friends who cared about her and her life.
“It’s good,” she said, her face warming. Grr, she despised that she still blushed sometimes.
“Oh, tell us more,” Clara said. Was it wrong that Violet wanted to smack the all-knowing grin off her face along with the sparkle in her eyes? Sure, Violet thought Clara was right that Speedy felt something for her, but he’d run off.
“He kissed me when I walked out of the bathroom in only my towel and ran into him. Then he left,” Violet said.
Cackles and laughter filled the room, but Violet wasn’t sure why her new friends were laughing at her.
“We’re not laughing at you,” Beth said, sitting down by Violet on the couch.
“Nope, we’re laughing at a man seeing his forever and running away because he wasn’t ready to deal with it,” Faith said, grinning and high-fiving Harry.
“So, let’s go back to the kiss. How was it?” Clara asked.
“It was just like the kisses in the romances we read. And then nothing. He apologized, said he overstepped, and left,” Violet said.
“Oh yeah, that’s a man running,” Sprite said, sipping her drink and shaking her head no at Regina trying to hand her one of Beth’s drinks.
Regina stood staring at Sprite. Violet wondered what was going on.
“You’re sipping a ginger ale, and you just said no to PixieCider which you love. Are you feeling all right?” Regina asked.
“No. I’m not,” Sprite mumbled.
“Do you want me to call Stella? She wanted to play with the kids tonight, but she could come over,” Regina asked.
Sprite shook her head, held up a finger, and pulled out her phone. She dialed someone.
“You’re on speaker. Your mom wants to know why I’m sipping ginger ale instead of enjoying a mixed drink. Would you like to tell her how we broke our agreement?” Sprite asked.
“I said I was sorry. I didn’t mean to but I’m not sad about it,” Roam, Sprite’s husband, said.
“Roam, what did you do?” Regina asked, her hands on her hips.
Violet loved how it didn’t matter that her sons were in their forties; if they screwed up, their mom had no problem chastising them.
“I convinced Sprite to let me have her in the snowplow barn a while ago. She might have been on antibiotics, and I didn’t have a condom. I figured we’d be okay one time,” Roam whined.
“Well, I’m thrilled you’re having another child, Roam, but don’t tell me you didn’t know the risks. You have six kids. You know how they are made. Now, what agreement did you break?” Regina asked.
“That we’d wait to have a baby until Matthew was out of diapers,” Roam said.
Violet friggin’ loved seeing the inner workings of what she considered a very happy marriage. She didn’t have one for reference but seeing that Sprite and Roam could disagree and still love each other was eye-opening for Violet.
“I love you, Roam, and I’m happy you’re having another grandbaby for me to spoil, but you and I know you’re going to have to figure out how to make this up to Sprite. Talk to your dad. He has a lot of experience groveling,” Regina said, leaning down to wrap her arms around Sprite.
“Congratulations. I’m happy for you, and we’ll figure out how to help you,” Regina said. Sprite nodded, and Violet got up to congratulate her.
Once everyone had settled down, their attention turned back to Violet. She squirmed a little.
“So, what do you want, Violet?” Beth asked.
Violet thought about how it felt living with Speedy and taking care of the kids.
“I want Speedy and the kids permanently, but I don’t know how,” Violet said softly.
Clara grabbed a paper and pen. “Well, let’s get started on some ideas on how we can help Violet. I’ll babysit the kids tomorrow night, and maybe some of you, along with Violet and Speedy, could go to the Nelson’s Hot Cocoa and Mistletoe Party.”
“Oh, good idea. Maybe we need some toys picked up for Santa’s Slay and the kids for Christmas?” Regina suggested.
Violet listened to all the women’s ideas as Clara wrote them down. It was interesting how one idea sparked another. Violet didn’t care so much about how they got there; she just wanted to be Speedy’s woman and Deacon and Tessie’s mom when it was all over.
Speedy laid Tessie in her bed, laying a light flannel blanket over her. He kissed her forehead. Deacon was playing a game on the game console someone had brought over.
With Violet out for the evening, he knew it was time. He’d been putting it off, but he had to know what words Anita had left him with.
He sat down at the kitchen table and pulled the envelope from his pocket. Sliding his nail under the flap, he opened it and pulled out the two sheets of paper. Two little kids depending on him, and Anita wrote him just two sheets of paper.
Dear Deke,
I’ve started this letter so many times, then stopped. When I realized I was pregnant with Deacon, you were already deployed on assignment for at least the next year, you said.
I’d never wanted to be married to a military man, but let’s face it, military men make up the majority of eligible men in town. I knew you loved the military and wanted to stay in.
I loved my town and couldn’t see a life where I followed wherever my soldier was sent. We also didn’t talk about kids, and my assumption was that if you wanted them, you wouldn’t be in the military.
Speedy had to pause reading for a minute because her words had him clenching his hands, trying not to yell.
She assumed without even talking to him.
Speedy had always been interested in a family, but Anita didn’t know that because she hadn’t given him the choice.
He took a deep breath before starting to read again.
I loved Deacon from the first, and I’d be lying if I didn’t from time to time think about letting you know. When Deacon was two, I had a friend check, and you were deployed again. It was selfish but Deacon was mine. I didn’t want to have to share him if you finally decided to come home.
This is hard for me to write because now I’m second-guessing everything. Last year, I met a man on leave from the Army. We had an instant connection. We started making plans.
Six weeks after he died in a training accident, I started having morning sickness. I grieved losing him but loved the little life we’d made together. It was a small piece of him to hold onto.
Tessie and Deacon are my greatest joys. I realized, with my parents gone and Tessie’s dad gone, that I needed to put something in place if something happened to me. He was an only child and his parents are deceased. If you’re reading this, it means something has happened to me.
I know you’re not Tessie’s biological dad, but I put you on the birth certificate because you’re a good man. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Deacon earlier, but I know the man you are won’t let you hold it against him.
Please take care of my babies and give them a wonderful life. You gave me one of the greatest gifts I could ever have when you gave me Deacon.
Maybe someday you can think of me fondly, but if not, I can understand your anger. Please know that I didn’t think you wouldn’t be an amazing father. It was all about the life I wanted to live that I didn’t contact you.
Take care of my babies,
Anita
Speedy wiped his face. He didn’t know when he’d started crying or why. All he could think about was the time he missed with Deacon. Anita had done a fantastic job with him. How was Speedy supposed to look forward with all the regrets he had?
“Daddy, why are you crying?” Deacon said, his voice quivering.
Speedy motioned Deacon over, scooting back so Deacon could crawl up on his lap. He hugged Deacon, the scent of kid’s bodywash filling his nose.
“I’m just happy I have you in my life now,” Speedy said. He’d never voice his anger or grief at Anita’s actions to Deacon. He needed to remember the mommy that loved him.