Chapter Thirty-Six
Feeling like Cinderella fleeing the ball, Effie lifted her skirt and hurried between the two properties running up the stairs to her own flat. She unlocked the door and almost hurled herself inside.
Door closed, Effie sank down to the floor.
What had Jake said? They were on a break.
Had he known Tara was going to turn up tonight?
He must’ve done. Jake must’ve invited her.
Oh gosh, and Effie had allowed her hopes to float dangerously close to the surface.
He said he wanted to talk to her, well, there didn’t seem any need for that now.
Effie fished her phone out of her bag and opened her rarely used Instagram app.
It wasn’t her style to snoop, plus she’d been so busy with the shop, so she’d not looked since Maddie had found Tara’s profile.
However, now her curiosity got the better of her as she typed Tara’s name into the search box and pulled up her account.
There were a few pinned posts. The third one was a few years old and showed Jake lounging in a hammock next to Tara in blissful contentment.
But it was the first one that hollowed Effie out; a stunning tropical beach engagement shot.
She hadn’t recalled seeing that when Maddie had been sifting through the page.
She opened it up. It had been posted the previous week. So much for them being on a break!
She opened the first few posts, which showed Tara travelling around the English countryside, showing off the first blooms of spring, a fancy afternoon tea in a luxury hotel as well as a sponsored post for a very expensive-looking electric car.
In all the photos she looked immaculate, her signature curls shining like dark chocolate, a smile breaking like dawn across her elfin face.
Tara didn’t look the sort to contort herself into a wetsuit and let her hair dry into wild waves.
Swallowing back all her questions, Effie began to scroll through the comments.
Eventually she found a reel titled ‘Where is Jake?’ Against her better judgement, Effie opened it.
Tara was sitting in front of a mirror, hair back in a fluffy headband, doing her makeup whilst discussing the products she was using and explaining where her boyfriend was.
‘Hello, my lovelies, I’ve seen all your comments, and I know you’re all wondering where my gorgeous Jakey is.
I wanted to make this video to stop all the speculation and reassure you that everything is fine.
Really. We’re just working on some individual projects but we both have something really exciting coming. I know you’ll love it.’
Effie glanced at the date. Seven weeks ago.
Just before she had moved to Polcarrow and met Jake.
No wonder he’d been cagey about his future plans.
Effie was embarrassed to admit that she’d thought the term ‘being on a break’ had meant the relationship was heading towards its end, not a reconciliation.
She pushed aside memories of their tender kisses, his claim that he was seventy per cent sure he’d stay in Polcarrow.
When had he decided to get back together with Tara?
Exhausted from the social activity of the evening and from scrolling through social media, Effie put her phone back in her bag and let out a long sigh.
Determined not to let some man make her cry, she wiped away the tears, her hands coming away with mascara smears.
Her eye caught the time on the kitchen clock.
She’d been sitting on the floor for forty-five minutes, lost in her social media doomscrolling.
Forty-five minutes and Jake hadn’t come to find her.
Effie’s heart sank when she realised where his priorities lay.
She hauled herself up, padded into the bathroom and removed her makeup, before changing out of her dress and into her pyjamas.
The dress, which Effie had felt a million dollars in at the start of the night, looked frumpy next to Tara’s sleek sheath.
Heading back into the kitchen, she turned on one of the low lamps and set the kettle to boil.
She was making a camomile tea, musing sadly on how differently the night was meant to end with celebratory drinks in the pub, when there was a knock at the door.
Effie froze. The knock came again.
‘Effie, please, we need to talk.’
She swallowed. She could just pretend she hadn’t heard; that she’d gone to bed. Her name came again like a plea. She crossed over to the door and pulled it open, fixing Jake with what she hoped was a steely, unimpressed stare. ‘OK, what do you have to say?’
‘Effie, I’m sorry, I . . .’ he floundered.
‘Do you have something to be sorry about?’ she asked.
‘No. Yes. Maybe. Effie, please, can I come in?’
She stepped aside and let him into her flat, her sanctuary. She regarded him through the moonlight, the distance between them now feeling unnavigable. She wasn’t going to start this conversation.
‘So, that’s Tara.’
‘I figured that out.’
‘Effie, please, let me explain.’
‘I’m not stopping you.’ She moved past him, picked up her mug and perched on the edge of the sofa, not inviting him to sit. ‘What’s going on? Are you still on a break or are you back together? Is this what you wanted to talk to me about?’ she snapped.
‘Yes.’ Jake sagged into himself. ‘But it’s not what it looks like, honestly, Eff, it’s a mess, a huge, huge mess. I was honest when I said I didn’t know if I was staying. Tara and I were on a break and we do have unfinished business. But, you have to believe me, it’s not of the romantic sort.’
Effie sat back, curling her feet underneath her. ‘I don’t know what to believe any more, Jake. What’s going on?’
‘We still have some professional ends to tie up.’ Jake dropped into the chair. ‘It’s one of the reasons I was trying not to lead you on,’ he began. ‘Things between us are complicated. We decided to spend time apart to see if we missed each other.’
‘And do you?’ Effie asked even though she knew the answer would sting.
Jake considered this. ‘Maybe. At least in the beginning, but now, I don’t know. I didn’t think I’d meet you and that made things complicated. Effie, I’m not explaining this very well, am I?’
Sipping her tea, she shook her head.
‘You see, it was all true, all the stuff about me being burned out by the travelling. The putting our relationship on a break. The not knowing what was going to happen. We’ve been in touch recently, trying to resolve things.
There’s still so much to sort out. I’ve always tried to be honest with you, Effie, but it’s been difficult when I’ve not known what I want.
But the longer I was here, the less appealing going back became.
But it turns out, I have to go back with Tara. ’
‘Why? What do you mean?’
‘We have one last contract to see through. A joint one. In the Maldives. We can’t get out of it. Believe me, I’ve been trying.’
Effie stared at him in disbelief. ‘What?’
Jake squirmed. ‘It was all organised before we went on a break. If we cancel, Tara will have to pay back the fee she’s been paid and she’s already spent it.’
‘Can’t you just not go?’
Embarrassed, Jake shook his head. ‘I spent my fee too.’
Silence spread between them.
‘I spent it on the flat, the website, printing those photos,’ he explained. ‘I saw it as a way to start again. I was just planning to be here a few months to decompress, make some decisions. Meeting you has confused things for me.’
‘Don’t blame this on me, Jake.’ Effie’s voice was cold. ‘So that’s it? She turns up and you ditch everything here to go and play fake boyfriend?’ Effie couldn’t help her hurt spilling out. ‘You are going to be a fake boyfriend, aren’t you?’
‘Effie, I know it’s hard but please try to understand, I can’t not go,’ Jake’s voice was strained. ‘I need to do this. We both do. We were together ten years, we built a brand, we have a lot to discuss and sort out. This is the perfect opportunity to do so.’
Effie sipped her tea, trying to process what Jake was telling her. ‘You didn’t answer me, Jake, are you and Tara getting back together?’
‘I don’t know,’ he admitted in a small voice. ‘We still have a lot to talk about.’
‘In the Maldives? Such a hardship.’ Effie rolled her eyes.
‘Eff—’
‘When?’
Jake’s eyes were pained as he looked at her. ‘Tomorrow. I’m leaving with Tara tomorrow. We have an early-morning flight the day after.’
Effie studied him whilst trying to process everything he was trying to say. Realisation that she was exhausted by all his excuses washed through her. Yes, that flicker of attraction still lingered between them, but Jake’s commitment to everything seemed as fragile as a pattern in the sand.
‘I’m so sorry, Eff, this wasn’t meant to happen.’
‘Us? Or Tara coming back?’
‘Everything in the way it has. Us was a good thing. You have to believe me. But the timing . . .’
Effie drained her tea and stood up. ‘In that case, I think you’d better go. Since you’ve got an early start. And a big decision to make. Just make sure you make your own mind up, Jake, that you do what you want, not what anyone else thinks you should do.’
Jake flinched at the hardness in her voice before standing up.
As he moved, he reached for her, but Effie stepped back, folding her arms into her body to keep herself held together.
He moved across the flat, cutting through the moonlight.
He pulled open the door, paused to look back at her.
Regret flickered over his face. He opened his mouth, but whatever he was going to say, to make it better or worse, was trapped within him.
Effie flinched as the door clicked shut. Silence flooded in as the tears overflowed.