Chapter Ten Shelby
I gasp, and Daphne looks up from her laptop, fixing me with a wide-eyed gaze.
“What? Are you okay?” she asks.
Nodding, I point at my laptop, where a video with my face fills the screen. That’s not what surprises me. It’s the handle of the person posting it.
“I think this is Finn,” I whisper.
“Play it!” She scoots closer to me on the sofa so she can see my screen.
My hands are shaking as I hit play. It’s a recording of my recording, and I swallow a sob when I see Marsha’s sweet kitty face on the screen. It’s my video from earlier today, and Marsha is reacting and interacting with me.
“Aww...” Daphne says.
It’s the typed captions that are making my heart pound and my breath catch.
Marsha – I miss you.
Marsha – Dad misses you too. He’s an idiot.
Marsha’s Dad – I am an idiot. I’m so sorry.
Marsha’s Dad – Shelby, you’re more than right, you’re everything.
Marsha’s Dad – Shelby, I love you. Please give me another chance. I’ll wait for you.
“Wow,” Daphne says on a sigh. “That’s him?”
“Yeah, that’s his cat, Marsha.”
Daphne holds her clasped hands to her heart like she’s about to swoon.
“He’s a cat dad? Oh my goodness, I think my ovaries just sighed.”
It’s not just my ovaries reacting to Finn’s video.
“So what are you going to do?” Daphne asks. “That was a pretty good grovel.”
I nod. “It was. But I meant what I said. I’m okay being alone. I’m enough just as I am. If Finn and I are right for each other, it’s going to work out. You’re sure you’re okay with me camping out here for a bit longer?”
My “oof” slips out when Daphne tackle-hugs me with an emphatic, “Yes!”
We’re both giggling as we right ourselves.
“Absolutely. It’s nice having someone here.
It’s like when we were roommates. The house is so quiet when Logan is traveling.
I spend the weekend knitting and watching Murder, She Wrote.
Logan teases me that I’m the oldest twenty-six-year-old he knows.
He’ll be thrilled to know I’m hanging out with you. ”
My turn to give her a hug. Less exuberant, but no less heartfelt.
“Promise you’ll tell me if I overstay my welcome?” I ask.
Daphne sighs and rolls her eyes. “I promise. But I’m pretty sure you’ll be moving out on your own before I kick you out.”
“So what do I do? Do I respond?”
She shrugs. “I don’t know, Shelbs. You were going to get married three days ago to a different guy, so this all feels crazy-fast. It takes me more than three days to decide if I want to put Oreos or Chips Ahoy on my grocery list.”
“Why wouldn’t you get both?”
Daphne flops back against the sofa. “If I have both, then I’ll open both, and I end up with stale cookies. So I do one at a time, but it’s hard to know which one I’ll want.”
She lost me at cookies lasting long enough to go stale. Not something I can relate to.
“Anyway,” I say. “Let’s focus here because I’m reconsidering our friendship if you let cookies go stale. I thought I knew you, Daphne Foster.”
She giggles. “Forgive me, Shelby, I have sinned.”
Now we’re both giggling.
Daphne takes a deep breath and calms down. “So what’s your plan?”
“I’m going to do what makes me happy. For now, that’s going to the refuge. If we run into each other, we’ll take it from there.”
“You’re just going to leave it up to fate?”
I shrug. “I guess so? I mean, it’s been working.
If it wasn’t fate, then how did I end up on top of a tower at the wildlife refuge he works at?
I didn’t know he was here. I was only here because I insisted on having the wedding at the resort my parents and grandparents got married at. I paid for that myself.”
“Hmm... Okay, so leave it to fate. Are you going to respond to help give fate a nudge?” Her wink makes me giggle.
I wrinkle my brow. “I don’t know. What do I say? He said he loves me. We told each other that we loved each other before everything went to shit. I do love him. But I’m scared. Look with happened with Konner. I don’t have the best track record.”
Daphne stops on her way to the kitchen and rests her hip against one of the dining room chairs. She looks fierce with her arms folded across her chest.
“You didn’t make a bad decision with Konner all on your own. You were set up. Ivy introduced the two of you and encouraged you to date him. They were using you for your connections to build their own followings and sponsorships. You trusted them. That’s not a failing.”
I stand and grab a bottle of water from the fridge, handing one to Daphne after she grabs a bag of chips from the cabinet.
“It feels like it. You’re the only true friend I have, Daph. And I let us lose touch after graduation. I’m sorry.”
She wraps me in a tight hug, rocking me from side to side. She puts down the water and chips after she releases me and clasps me on my shoulders, holding me at arm’s length and looking at me sternly.
“Shelby Marie Albright,” she says.
Giggling, I correct her. “My middle name is Corrine.”
“Ooh, that’s pretty. But whatever. Shelby Corrine Albright, you are not the only person in our friendship. Was I texting you regularly? Calling you weekly? Doing more than liking your posts and making a comment here and there? No! I was a crap friend too.”
My gasp sounds loud in the quiet house. That wasn’t what I was expecting her to say.
She gives me a slight shake. “And you know what? That doesn’t mean we aren’t friends and that you aren’t one of my closest friends.
We don’t need to be in each other’s pockets.
I know if I need you, you’ll be there for me.
Like you were when my grandmother died. You were dealing with your own grief from your grandparents dying the year before, but you were still there for me.
I’m grateful I can be here for you now. Maybe our version of true friendship isn’t like a Hallmark movie or a sitcom, but it works for us.
So stop hunting for things to feel guilty about and focus on what you’re great at.
Here’s a hint—you’re awesome at being generous and loving people.
Even when people hurt you or take advantage of your kindness, you don’t let that change you.
The next time you’re more selective and cautious in who gets the gift of your love and friendship, but you still offer it even though you’re scared.
That’s an incredible gift to have, Shelby.
You inspire me to push against my boundaries and challenge my fears too. ”
Tears are running down our cheeks as we hug.
“Oh, Daph,” I say, sniffling and wiping my nose on a tissue I dug out of the pocket of my hoodie. “I love you.”
“I love you too. Thank you for not wiping your snot in my hair.”
That is so totally Daphne and one of the reasons why I love her.
Our tears turn to peals of laughter as we settle on the couch.
There’s a hockey game Daphne doesn’t want to miss.
She’s a huge fan of the Philadelphia team and has a big stuffed version of the team’s googly-eyed furry orange mascot she cuddles with.
She also has quite the potty mouth when the referees make calls she doesn’t agree with. It’s hilarious.
I decide not to make a video reply to Finn. He doesn’t want to be in the spotlight, and I don’t want to use him for likes and comments. Instead, I send him a direct message on the app since I don’t have his email or cell phone number. His profile name makes me smile. Big Hairy Cat Dad, indeed.
Me: Hi Finn, I saw Marsha’s video. I loved it.
Please tell her I miss her too. I’m still in town, staying with a rediscovered friend from college.
I want to see you and talk, but I’m not sure when I’ll be ready.
I meant it when I told you I love you, but the way everything went so wrong so fast scares me.
Please, let’s take this slowly. I don’t want what’s between us to be another mistake.
Hitting send, I close my laptop and put it on the coffee table, determined not to check every two minutes to see if Finn has replied.
I make it until the final minutes of the third period.
Philadelphia is beating Pittsburgh, and Daphne is doing a happy dance in her seat and making her stuffed mascot doll dance.
I give in to temptation and open my laptop to see if Finn wrote back. He did!
Finn: Shelby, nothing between us can ever be a mistake as long as it ends with us being together. The only mistake would be giving up and being apart. I’ll give you time and space, but if you’re at the refuge, I can’t guarantee we won’t run into each other. It’s not like I can stay in the office.
He gave me his phone number and email address. I chew on my lip. Should I text him? Call him?
Daphne leans over and makes her stuffed critter pretend to read my screen, then she turns its wide, googly-eyed gaze to me. Giggling, I shove its fuzzy orange shoulder to get it out of the way.
Suddenly my phone is shoved into my hand.
“Text him,” she commands.
My hands shake slightly as I enter his contact info into my phone.
I take a deep breath, then call up his contact and start a text.
Me: Hi. It’s Shelby. Is it okay if I go to the refuge? I don’t want to make things difficult.
Finn: It’s federal land, of course you can go there. You aren’t making things difficult.
It’s not a “hope to see you there” but it’s not “stay away,” either. I guess we’ll see what happens. Gah. I’m so nervous, but I’m hopeful this is a new beginning for us. Maybe this is just something silly we’re going to laugh about someday. Please let there be laughter. I’m all cried out.