Seven
WADE
Armed with scrapbooks from Mum’s crafting phase, I knocked on the front door of the McCarthy house. The nerves bustled inside me despite the fact that I’d spent half my childhood at this home.
Hannah McCarthy opened the door and gathered me in her arms. “So good to see you again. I didn’t get a chance to talk to you much last night.” She stepped to the right and ushered me inside.
“Good to see you too, Hannah.” I smiled at Quinn’s mum, and although I’d attempted for it to look warm, it must’ve fallen flat.
“You must be here to make amends with Quinn.” She grimaced. “Her expression has been similar to that look on your face, and she keeps blaming it on a hangover. Except she usually cures that with a juice and a couple of hash browns.”
I laughed; Quinn had been using the same hangover cure for years. My expression sobering, I answered, “Yes, I said something to her last night, but I didn’t realise that it was out of context. I need to explain things to her.”
“You’re always welcome in this house, Wade, but just fair warning, she’s not in a talkative mood.” Hannah gave me another grimace before directing me to the open-plan kitchen where Quinn sat with Max, both of them sipping from tall glasses full of some purple concoction.
“Juice time, is it?” I asked as I walked in. Max quickly came over and gave me the six-step handshake we’d been exchanging for years.
“Wade,” Quinn greeted me coolly, “what brings you over?”
“I dug out some of the old scrapbooks that Mum put together when we were younger.” I placed them on the kitchen table, taking a seat opposite Quinn. Max opened them up and straightaway started pointing at me, making remarks about how small I looked.
“Oh, look, there you are, Mum.” Max pointed at a picture of Quinn and me after a dance eisteddfod, my arm wrapped around her, both of us grinning like fools with our awards in our hands.
Max kept flipping pages, remarking on the pics of our shared childhood. Quinn peered at them from the corner of her eye. When Max started on another album, one with pics of me in my teens, Quinn started fidgeting.
“Max,” Hannah called from the hallway, “can you come help me get those boxes off the top shelf in my wardrobe?”
“Nan, I’m looking at the pics of Mum and Uncle Wade,” Max whined.
“I’m sure Wade will let you have a look at them later. I need you to help me because you know how my shoulder gets.”
I stifled a laugh. Hannah was not having much luck at subtly trying to give me and Quinn some privacy. With one last sigh, Max stood up from the table to do his grandsonly duty.
“What’s this about, Wade?” Quinn hissed as soon as her son left the room. “What do old pics prove?”
“I had a speech all prepared, but the words have disappeared.” I sighed.
“I don’t need a fancy speech, Wade, I just need the truth.” Quinn’s voice cracked with emotion.
I took a breath and steadied myself. “Firstly, I just want to say sorry. I ambushed you, and I realise now what I thought was a romantic gesture was just plain crazy.”
Quinn nodded in acknowledgement.
“I brought over the albums because I wanted to show you something.” I flipped open the album Max had just been looking at, and pointed at the pictures. “See this? I’m not looking at the camera, so where am I looking?”
Quinn rolled her eyes. “At me.”
I flipped to the next page. “Where are my eyes, Quinn?”
“Looking at me,” she replied quietly.
I continued going through the scrapbook until Quinn closed it and sighed. “Wade, this little trip down memory lane has been fun and everything, but I still don’t get the point of the pics.”
“For as long as I can remember, you’ve been the light in any room I’m in. I gravitate to you and just need to be in your presence.”
“Of course, we’re best friends…” She sighed.
“It’s not that, not at all. That holidays I made the pact with you? I’d been trying to find the words to tell you something, and I didn’t know how to do it, so I made up the pact hoping that we never had to rely on it.”
“That’s why I said no. You shouldn’t want to spend your life with me because of some stupid promise we made as kids.”
“But it’s not a stupid promise; it was the fallback I put in place because I didn’t know how to bridge the gap, to let you know I want to be more than friends, I always have.”
Quinn gasped at my words. “Then why wait this long to tell me?”
“I tried to tell you so many times; you have no idea how intimidating it can be. I was always so afraid that you’d laugh at me, your nerdy best friend.
I asked you to the formal, but then you assumed I asked to go as friends.
Then I told myself I’d wait until the summer so that you didn’t need to put up with seeing me at school if it all fell flat.
There were so many just wait scenarios because I kept putting it off from being afraid, but then I waited too long and you started dating Dean. ”
“I only started dating Dean because he was there, he paid me some attention…I don’t regret anything because he gave me Max, but…” Quinn focused her gaze on her hands.
“But Max came along, and I respected you had a little family unit. I tried to shut my feelings down. I even tried pulling away from our friendship because I knew Dean didn’t like me,” I told her honestly.
“Dean felt threatened by you,” Quinn admitted.
“I couldn’t completely stay away, because even just as friends, I needed you in my life.” I looked over the table at her, imploring her to look up, to look into my eyes and see the feelings that I just couldn’t put into words at the time.
“I need you in my life, too.” Quinn’s gaze met mine, years of heartbreak in her eyes. “But why did you wait this long?”
“When the whole Formax thing took off, I thought going overseas was the best thing I could do. I couldn’t stand seeing you with Dean, knowing he didn’t deserve you.” The words sat there between us, and I paused for a moment before admitting, “I didn’t think I deserved you, either.”
I still didn’t think I deserved her. Quinn sat in quiet contemplation, sipping the last of the purple concoction.
“Dean has been gone a long time, Wade, why have you waited all these years?” The exasperation was obvious in Quinn’s expression.
I gathered my thoughts and hoped this wouldn’t come out wrong.
“I wanted to give you some time after the breakup. I didn’t want to just pounce on you as soon as you were single, but then you started telling me about the dates you went on.
I knew none of them were serious, but I took that as a sign that it was time.
That was when Formax had really starting ramping up, and I was also contracted to doing that world tour.
There were small breaks in between, but in the months it took for me to schedule more than a few days off, you’d decided that you’d sworn off men and was just going to concentrate on raising Max.
I respect that choice. You’re an amazing mum, and I know he needs that stability. ”
“So if you respect it so much, why now? Max is still a kid; he still needs stability. Why propose out of nowhere? That’s not exactly a stable gesture. You live in Las Vegas!”
I laughed at my stupidity. I recognise how messed up that was now.
“Because I don’t plan on living there anymore.
I’ve been looking at some places online; Mum’s been sending me listings as soon as they come in.
I haven’t found the right place yet, but I assure you, I want to come home, Quinn.
I want to see where things can go with you. ”
“See where things go?” The hope in Quinn’s eyes lit my heart up.
“Yeah, I’m not going to bring out that big-ass diamond ring again, but I want to at least see if you’d like to…
I don’t know…date me?” I blushed and shrugged my shoulders.
“This is why I was never able to tell you how I felt. I’m bumbling around, and after all this, I still haven’t even asked you how you feel? Do you even find me attractive?”
“Wade, that’s a leading question. You know you’re hot. Millions of followers on every platform know that you’re hot.” Quinn rolled her eyes.
“I don’t care what other people think. I only care about what you think.” I pulled her hand into mine. “You don’t have to answer that question, though; I don’t want to put any more pressure on you. I do have one question for you though, Quinn McCarthy. Would you like to go on a date with me?”
Quinn blushed, but she couldn’t hide the smile that bloomed on her face. “Yes, Wade, I would like to go on a date with you.”
I heard a commotion in the hallway. I was certain that I’d heard Max shout, “YES!” followed by shushing from Hannah, but I was okay with that because it was exactly what I wanted to do.
I internally did a happy dance while I brought Quinn’s hand up to my lips.
As much as I wanted to pull her to me and kiss her senseless, I settled for a kiss on the hand.
Especially with her son and mum spying on us. A promise until our date.
Quinn agreed to go to dinner with me the next day, and I left the scrapbooks with her for Max to continue looking at.
I shouted my goodbyes to Max and Hannah, who were still within earshot, probably still spying on us.
I had a date to prepare for, and even though I’ve performed all over the world, this was the thing that scared me most. My future was at stake, the future I’d dreamed about for years, and it was terrifying.