Chapter 94
Nick
Charlie finds Captain Hyun after an hour of searching.
She did not survive her fall.
We salute our fallen captain, tears rolling down our faces, before taking her body carefully to where we’ve laid the others, and covering her with a sheet.
Despair threatens me from the edges of my mind and my heart.
One of the FEMA workers has a working satellite phone, which I can use to call my parents. This brings me a flash of hope: they are okay, and so is Abigail.
They made it to a shelter completely unscathed, and all three of them are currently helping hand out water and packaged food to wounded and displaced survivors.
“How are you?” my mother asks. “Please tell me you’ve been safe.”
“Elizabeth didn’t survive,” I whisper.
“Nicolas, I’m so sorry.”
“I saw her fall.”
My mother is silent for a long time.
“I am so proud of you for what you do,” she says finally. “You are what this city needs right now.”
“What about you? What about Abigail?”
Then, I voice the concerns that have been eating at me since Raquel first showed back up on my doorstep and threatened to take Abbie from me.
“Am I being selfish by being out here, playing the hero, when I should really be with you?”
“Nicolas,” my mother says sharply. “I never want to hear you ask that question again. No one could look at what you’re doing right now and think that it’s selfish.
Yes, we wish you were here. Yes, Abbie misses her father.
Yes, I’m terrified that my son might not make it home tonight.
But I know that what you are doing is noble and brave, and that you are doing what you need to do.
You are a hero, my son. Anyone who tells you something else is wrong, and they’ll have to answer to me. ”
Tears run down my cheeks. “Thank you, Mamá. I love you.”
“I love you too. Is Tristan there? Is he okay?”
She must hear the answer in my silence.
“Oh, honey….”
“We don’t know if he’s dead,” I manage to say. “He fell through a hole in the street during the initial quake. He’s been trapped beneath rubble for hours. We have no idea if he’s alive, or hurt, or dead.”
“We have hope,” my mother says firmly. “Don’t give up on hope. I will pray for him.”
I close my eyes. “Thank you, Mamá. I think I’m going to keep looking for him, now. Give Papá and Abbie my love.”
“Do you want to talk to them right now?”
I wipe my cheeks. “I don’t think I can. I need to hold it together, and I won’t if I talk to Abbie. Please tell her I love her.”
“I will. And, Nick, have hope.”
Have hope. I’ll sure fucking try.