Chapter 17
Chapter
Seventeen
“CAN YOU HAVE REGULAR DELIVERIES made?” I ask Nial. I can’t quite look him in the eye.
“If that’s what you wish,” he says. There’s concern in his quiet tone. He’s so caring, so observant.
“Please,” I say. “Make sure he has plenty.”
“Of course,” Nial says. He doesn’t leave at first. He stands before me, there to support me if I just reach out and ask for it.
But I can’t. I won’t.
Ian may have ended it. Stuck a knife through my heart and pushed it clear through and out the other side. But I can’t help it. I can still give to him what I can.
I’ve just asked Nial to continue sending deliveries of blood to Ian’s house.
“I’ll be back later,” I say to him. I’m distracted, my mind too full of too many things. Surely I’ll just topple over at any moment because it’s too bogged down.
But I don’t.
The sun feels too bright, even though it’s overcast. The air is too crisp and fresh after staying inside for what feels like so long. The spaces are too large and open.
But I drive into town by myself.
The construction site is impressive. In a little over a month, the crews have gotten all the houses framed and dried in. They’re inside working on all the innards. Lillian has been handling the applications for whom they will eventually go to when they’re finished.
I stand at the edge of the property, watching, when a stout man in a hardhat comes wandering over to me.
“I’m sorry miss,” he huffs. “But this is a busy build zone. I’m gonna’ have to ask you to leave.”
“I was just checking on my latest project,” I say. I’m tired. I’m not as polite and kind as I should be. But that’s where I’m at right now. I really want to bite his head off, truth be told.
“Your…” the man says, trying to make sense of what I’ve just said. “You’re Alivia Conrath.”
I reach out a hand and after a moment of debate, he accepts it and shakes it. I make sure to squeeze hard. “It’s Ryan actually. Alivia Ryan.”
“Nice to meet you. I’m Jeffrey,” he says with a little nod when I let go of his hand. He shakes it just slightly. “It sure is a nice thing you’re doing here. The town really needs it. And I heard about the playground you put in at the school.”
“I’m just trying to give back to the community,” I offer. I don’t really want to continue this conversation. I just want to be me for a minute. “Thanks for your hard work. The places look great. I’m sure you’re busy, so I’ll let you go.”
I’ve taken him aback, dismissing him like that. But he offers a smile and says goodbye before walking back to the jobsite.
I turn from the site, hop in my car, and head back into town. I park in the familiar parking lot at Fred’s and climb out. The little bell rings when I walk inside and the scent of heaven floods my senses.
A new girl I don’t recognize is working the counter. I smile at her and order a poppy seed muffin and a hot chocolate.
“Is that Miss Ryan?” Fred’s deep voice booms from the back. He comes tottling out, a smile on his face.
“Hey, Fred,” I offer him a genuine smile as I take my drink from Tina. “It’s good to see you.”
“Wasn’t sure if I’d ever see you…like this, again,” he looks around to make sure no one is paying attention.
I know exactly what he’s meaning—me human.
“Haven’t seen you out and about in daylight in a while,” he says quietly as he follows me to a table. “I had started to wonder.”
Internally, I sigh. All I want right now is a few hours of non-vampire related normalcy, but this is my life now. In this town, it’s all I’m ever going to be a part of. There’s no escaping it.
“Not yet,” I tell him. “But it will be very soon.”
He grunts a hmm as he leans back in his chair and folds his arms over his wide girth. The bell dings and we both look up to see Luke walk in.
He doesn’t exactly smile when he looks at me. More just a tip of the head and his eyes fill with tiredness. But he walks up and greets us. He’s wearing jeans and a blue t-shirt under a black leather jacket. It’s strange seeing him out of uniform. I realize then how handsome of a man Luke really is.
“You was right,” Fred says to Luke. “She’s still a day walker.”
“Told you it wouldn’t be until the very last second,” Luke says as he sinks into his seat.
“The usual, Luke?” Tina calls to him from the counter.
“Yes, ma’am,” he confirms, flashing her a polite smile.
“What, you two had a bet running on how soon I’d…change?” I look around to see who might be listening. There’s a couple sitting in the far corner, looking at something on a laptop. They look like they might be tourists, even though it’s winter and the off-season.
“I wouldn’t exactly call it a bet,” Luke says, cocking a smile. “But I have two weeks from tomorrow pegged.”
I shake my head as Fred and Luke both laugh. “Thanks,” I say. “Nice to know my impending death is so entertaining.”
I must say it slightly too loud, because the couple in the corner look over at me with a wary expression.
Luke looks at me with his eyebrows raised and I stifle a laugh.
“Careful there,” he says. “People in town are only just starting to calm down after the panic that started in December. Don’t you go starting it back up.”
“Is it really better now?” I ask as I take a sip of my drink. “I haven’t heard of any more people disappearing.”
Luke’s eyes darken. “Missing persons reports are up seventy percent in Hipsbro County. Things have been quiet in Silent Bend the last few weeks, but the area is still unsafe. In town, people are still on edge. But now that they’ve seen you aren’t what your father was rumored to be, they’ve relaxed.
I’m pretty impressed with how quickly you’ve changed the people’s opinions about you. ”
“Money has a way of changing people’s minds,” Fred says darkly.
Luke shrugs, giving him that. “They appreciate being given what the town did need.”
“Do you have a plan yet?” I ask Luke. “On how you’re going to get the people out of here when a certain lunatic comes?”
Tina brings him his coffee and he holds it between his hands, as if to warm them up. “I think you’re underestimating how deep people’s roots run here,” Luke says. “It’s going to take nothing short of an act of God to get them out of here.”
“Surely you have something,” I say in a low hiss. “People will die if they stay here, Luke.”
“What do you expect me to do, Alivia?” he growls back. “I am one man and people are stubborn.”
That dark snake I’ve felt growing inside of me slithers up through every one of my veins.
“I’ll tell the whole damn town what I am and show them the members of my House.
I’ll bring out the show of blood and destruction if I have to, if it will make them leave.
I won’t have Silent Bend’s blood on my hands when the King comes. ”
And I can tell I’ve taken things too far when I see the look on both their faces.
I think about what I’ve said. It’s dark. And demented. And the Alivia of three months ago would never have even thought of it. But circumstances change people.
“Alivia, you can’t make any guarantees of how long the King will stay,” Luke says quietly, glancing at the couple again.
They’re being too quiet and still and that makes me think they’re listening in on what we’re saying.
“What if he stays for weeks? Months? People won’t have anywhere to go.
Their roots are deep here and they’ve survived hardship before.
No matter what you do, there are going to be people caught in the crossfire. ”
I swallow hard.
I can’t imagine how that will feel, if people get hurt because of me. Because of this life I couldn’t help. Because of my heritage.
“I hate this,” I say as I fold my arms over my chest and lean back in my seat. “The fact that people might die because of me.”
Their silence is an awful weight on my chest.
The couple in the corner whispers something and my attention darts over to them. They’re looking at me with hesitance. “You should leave,” I say, more coldly than I thought I was capable of. “You should leave Silent Bend. And don’t come back.”
I suddenly stand, not bothering to see their reaction. I don’t need any more of this. I don’t want it.
I’m hiding from my guilt. But in the moment, I don’t know how else to deal with it.
“Thanks for the lovely chat, gentlemen,” I say as I step back from the table. They’ve both got startled expressions on their faces, but they don’t say anything as they watch me leave.
I take a deep breath of the cold air when I get outside. But my heart leaps into my throat when an ambulance goes racing past me, down toward the river. I watch it turn off of the main street and down one of the residential areas.
My heart aches. Ian should be in that ambulance. Wearing his uniform. Saving lives.
Instead he’s hiding.
I take a shaky breath and head for my car.
I take the long way home, driving out to the edges of Silent Bend, where the houses are few and far between.
They’re run down, many of them simple trailer homes.
Long grass fights against multitudes of trees, the undergrowth thick.
I weave down different roads on my way back. Memorize the lay of the land.
It feels like home. That’s certain. But it doesn’t feel quite like I want it to.
I just want to belong. And that isn’t going to happen. Not in a normal way.
I pull into the garage and just as I’m climbing out of the Jeep, the door into the house opens and out walks Raheem.
“I trust you enjoyed your excursion out into the daylight world?” he says with that heavy accent.
“Not exactly,” I say as I close the door. “I’m a little surprised you aren’t sleeping, like the others.”
“I’ve found the older I get, the less need I have for sleep,” he says. “Care to take a walk with me?”
I cock an eyebrow at him. “It’s the middle of the day.”
He produces something from his pocket. “After such a long life, I’ve found ways to adapt.”