Chapter 6 Michael #2
“Are you kidding?” he laughed. “Your mother did everything. It wasn’t until Jeff was born that I even realized how much she actually did. Then I made the mistake of mentioning it to her one day.”
Shaking his head, he sighed. “That was the end of my reign as king of the castle. She’s run the damn place ever since.”
Frowning, I looked at Blake, wondering if she would be a tyrant around the house. I just couldn’t picture it. We had a good balance between us, and it worked.
“Come on. Guess you’d better pick your cabin before she chooses one for you.”
“Shouldn’t I do that with Blake?” I asked as he dragged me out the door.
“Trust me, son. This is the last thing you’re gonna have a say in for a long time. Take the win.”
I drove around with him, checking out the various cabins on our land. He was being awfully generous, letting me choose from cabins they’d already built and newer ones that had just been finished. Considering our less-than-stellar relationship, it honestly took me by surprise.
Pulling down one of the gravel roads closer to the falls, he stopped just outside the one-story cabin.
“Well, this is it. She’s a beauty.”
“Nice property.”
“Come on. Let’s take a look inside.”
Following behind him, my eyes naturally drifted to the horizon where the peaks filled the landscape. It was absolutely beautiful out here. It reminded me of when I was a kid, when I’d be out working at the crack of dawn with Nelly, my horse at the time.
Back then, there was nothing but the early morning light and the sounds of nature. But then I’d gone off to war and everything changed for me. I’d had a difficult time finding peace after my DD, and nothing could fill that hollow feeling inside my chest.
Not even home.
It all felt right to me now. I took a deep breath, savoring the mountain air that surrounded me. The sounds of the river filled my brain, reminding me of better times.
Yeah, this was where I wanted to be.
“Michael!”
Pop waited impatiently on the steps, but didn’t reprimand me for taking a few moments to breathe it all in. This had really been my first chance since returning home. With Liam at the hospital recovering, things had been strained.
Walking into the house, I didn’t get any warm fuzzy feelings. But then, I hadn’t with any of the houses I’d been to. I wasn’t sure why Pop wanted me to pick out the house. I had absolutely zero feelings toward houses. It was a place to hang my hat. Nothing more.
But at least in here, I could imagine Blake curled up in a chair by the fire. Or her sitting on the couch, holding our kid in her arms. I could picture the house all decorated for Christmas, with wreaths hanging on the log walls and lights strewn from the rafters bracing the high ceilings.
I wasn’t much of a cook, but as I strode into the kitchen, I could imagine trying to learn my way around. It was the first real home I would have had in years. Every place I had stayed had been just a place to lay my head. I had no real ties to anyone or anywhere since I was last home.
“So?”
I nodded, taking another look around. “Yeah, I think this is the one.”
“You might have to add on a few rooms if you decide to have a couple more kids,” he laughed. “But it’s a good start.”
“Are you sure about this, Pop? I know you need the houses for rentals.”
“You have to live somewhere, and that kid is gonna grow up on this ranch with his family. Not in some house in the middle of town,” he snarled.
While I agreed with him, I didn’t care for the way he was demanding where we would live. There would definitely have to be some boundaries set between us. But that was a battle for another day. The fact was, Blake and I needed a place to call our own, and the sooner the better.
“We’ll pay for the house.”
Scowling, my old man looked like he was actually going to yell at me. “I didn’t offer it to you to buy.”
“I know that, but I don’t take handouts, and neither does Blake. We’ll pay for the house. Besides, we’re taking a rental from you. You’ll need the money to build another.”
“Don’t need your fucking money, Michael. Can’t you just come home and let us help you?” he asked, heading for the door.
“I could say the same thing.”
He spun around, getting in my face. “Is that right? You think I need you to come home and fix everything for me?”
“That’s not what I was saying.”
“Because I let the ranch down, right?”
“Pop, you didn’t let the ranch down.”
He scoffed, walking out the door. “All my sons know better than me. They all think I let the whole place fall apart.”
Flying down the steps, I grabbed his arm. “Nobody said that or even thinks it! Times are hard for ranches. You did the best you could, but we’re pivoting and moving on. Maybe it wasn’t your plan, but it’s gonna save the land!”
“And what good is the fucking land if I lost everything else?”
“You didn’t!” I shouted. “You still have your family. You still own the property. That’s worth more than cattle.”
“Right,” he laughed humorlessly. “I should just be happy with what I have and move on.” He shook his head at me. “Move on to what?”
I didn’t have an answer for him, but I knew well enough that wallowing would get him nowhere.
“Pop, believe it or not, I get it. I’ve been where you are.”
“You’ve never been—”
“I was dishonorably discharged from the military!” I snapped. “I’d lost everything. I couldn’t get a decent job. Hell, everyone who knew me thought I was a rapist!”
Cursing, I spun away from him, lacing my fingers behind my head. No matter how many times I told him, he would never fully understand.
“Do you have any idea what it was like to have all these dreams of what I could do, only to have them dashed at every turn? I was fighting in an underground club for money. I took jobs that I never would have considered before, all because I needed something to do that didn’t make me feel like I was nothing.
And for what? Because I was lost. So, yeah. I do get how you feel.”
When I looked at him, all I felt was sadness, and I hoped that something I was saying was reaching him on some level.
“Hell, Pop, you can reinvent yourself. Maybe it’s not what you wanted, but your opportunities are endless. You have everything at your fingertips. Instead of bitching about how you lost it all, dig in and find out how to make it better, because none of us can do that for you.”
Without another word, I stormed past him and got in the truck. I was done dealing with this shit. With all of it. I had great news to celebrate, and I wasn’t about to let anyone keep me down.