Chapter 5 Proper Positions and Other Pomposity
PROPER POSITIONS AND OTHER POMPOSITY
Azrion
Azrion had never been nervous before, not like this, not in such an all-encompassing way.
The sensation was so strange that it stopped him right on the stoop of Heck Post. He gave his reflection in the window a quick look—earrings all in place, nothing stuck between his teeth, hair undeniably perfect—but the scholar’s robes weren’t working.
He shrugged out of the billowing, too-loose garment, winked at the lean length of his body in formfitting pants and a neatly tucked shirt, and reached for the door.
And he couldn’t turn the handle.
Shit.
He’d done this kind of thing before, and he knew how it went. He would announce his arrival with a flowery but polite greeting, make his request with just enough flattery to convince her to agree with a fawning titter, and the deal would be done. So why was he second guessing everything?
He scratched at his chest and frowned down at his boots.
It was probably wise to be hesitant since he’d frightened her last time.
Azrion never frightened anyone—he was a charmer by nature, clever and perceptive by practice, and maybe a little annoying by choice, but everybody liked him.
Well, maybe not his father, but then it was laughable to think any son had a father who liked him.
The tickle in his chest didn’t go away, which told him it was under his skin.
Just like last time he’d entered the post. But unlike the time before, he’d been watching from across the road for Alamar to leave and then made sure the qapian and the package delivery human were nowhere to be seen.
This was his only chance, and since he really had no other choice, he had to go in now, prepared or not.
“Oh, post mistress,” he called, folding his robes over the chair in the empty entry. “I am in need of your exquisite assistance yet again.”
A great silence met him, and he filled it only by striding to the counter and drumming fingers atop it.
“I promise it’s not as complicated a request as last time.” He poked at the brightly colored quills sitting in a copper cup. “Well, no, it is more complicated, but it’s worth a fair bit more too.”
Still, the golden-haired human didn’t emerge, and relief mingled with disappointment. A different demon might assume she wasn’t there, but the thumping in Azrion’s chest said she had to be.
“Miss Kat, I implore you, please don’t ignore me.
” He stretched his arms across the counter as if beseeching her, imagining those bright eyes watching, growing intrigued, saying yes.
“As opposed to last time, this meeting will prove much more…fertile?” He frowned—that wasn’t necessarily the best choice of words, but he was being careful, and sometimes careful meant fucking things up, apparently.
There was a clatter from beyond the door, and Azrion’s trepidation was washed away. That was one of Kat’s clatters—he didn’t need to know her yet to know that, and he propelled himself over the counter to land on the other side, straighten his shirt, and gingerly push open the door.
There she stood, or rather crouched, an exotic creature squatting over a small pile of packages and letters, head turned to him in alarm and one bright eye ring as blue as Arder Pond peering out from between golden strands.
Gods, she really was beautiful.
Melora was an artist in her own right, she understood aesthetics and turned herself into a canvas daily, but she’d gotten humans all wrong.
When Azrion had first seen this one, he’d been struck dumb by her beauty, and it wasn’t a fluke.
Once again Kat had captured him, and he could do nothing but bask in her presence.
“What do you think you’re doing?” she said all in one livid breath.
Azrion swallowed a lump, but it got caught on that funny feeling in his chest, and there it stayed, knocking off his nonchalant demeanor so that he could only stroll into the post’s portal chamber, well…
chalantly. Magic crackled in the air, and he gave the mirrored sister runes a cursory glance—terribly interesting but not the most interesting thing in the room—then recovered his best grin.
“Looking for, and consequently finding, you.”
She pulled back at his words as if struck with a spell. He checked, but there was nothing unwittingly conjured in his hands. As she stood, Kat swept up the dropped letters and packages and pressed her back into the opposing wall. Ah, so she was afraid again—they’d have to work on that.
“Alamar said the drayks did their best, and you shouldn’t be upset.”
Azrion searched the chamber for the meaning of her words then remembered.
“Oh, the delivery I ordered?” He took a step toward her, and she probably would have backed up if there weren’t a wall keeping her in place.
“What about my face right now makes you think I’m upset?
” He smiled with all his teeth—charmingly, one might say, but perhaps not one who wasn’t used to seeing fangs as a compliment rather than a threat.
She lifted a shoulder, and one of the packages teetered atop the others. “I don’t…I mean, it’s not your face. Probably not anyway.”
Shoving his hands in his pockets, Azrion wandered in the opposing direction around the portal dais. “Well, I’m actually very pleased with you, Kat. So pleased, I have a proposition for you.”
“Oh, um, no thank you,” she chirped and then fled through the next door.
Well, that was not at all how it was meant to go, and yet there she went. What good were all his purple prose and perhaps borderline blue thoughts if she wouldn’t even listen to the beigest of words he had prepared?
Azrion snorted but halted in the doorway to the next chamber.
He’d never been so deep into the post, but he’d of course seen it from the outside, and he could only assume this was the interior of the drayk roost, though there wasn’t a single winged creature in sight.
Instead, the chamber was multiple stories tall, windowless, and had loads of tiny drawers built into every wall running all the way to its top.
“You’re not supposed to be back here.” Kat braced herself on the other side of a small table in the chamber’s center, her pile of packages and letters a poor barrier between them.
“And yet, here I am.” Azrion held his arms out and flicked his tail.
Her gaze followed it and rounded out—humans didn’t have tails, but apparently they read intimidation into them instead of friendliness. “Alamar will be back soon.”
“Then we ought to make this quick.” The thought of stumbling through this discussion with the postmaster present made his skin crawl—embarrassment was practically foreign to Azrion, so as it bubbled up in front of Kat, the words came spilling out right after.
“I’ve an amazing opportunity for you, one you simply won’t be able to turn down once you’ve heard the brilliance behind it, which I am very much hoping you will oblige me by listening to this time. ” And somehow, he said nothing at all.
Her fingers tightened on the string around the smallest parcel, but she didn’t shake her head. So, it wasn’t really an immediate no—marvelous—but that meant he had to explain, and that fluttery feeling in his chest attacked like its ancestors had been insulted.
“I have a…well, let’s call it a position that’s recently been vacated, and I’d like you to fill it.”
“I already have a job,” she said with the sluggishness of someone speaking to an exceptionally simple creature.
“Yes, and I’d like you to keep it, actually.” He grinned, but it felt too tight. “This would be a sort of secret venture. One on the side, if you’re willing to give up a little free time, for which of course I would pay you.” Gods, why couldn’t he just get it out?
But the human’s face changed then, nostrils flaring and lips pursing with intrigue. “You’d pay me?”
Thank the blazes, he was back in business. “Yes! You stand to make quite a lot of coin, in fact.” Azrion gestured grandly to himself. “I’m very well endowed.”
Her brows knit together, but she wasn’t turning him down despite another poor choice of words—he remembered the way her face had gone slack when he’d dropped those coins in front of her last time.
“You see, through no fault of my own, though there are unreasonable arguments floating around Heck that would suggest otherwise, I’ve recently found myself mate-less.
The timing is inopportune for the season, if not for the mind, but more importantly, the situation is in general quite vexing—my father has certain expectations, very few of which I’m willing to fulfill, but the whole mate thing was meant to be an easy one, yet mine refuses to cooperate.
I’ve come up with a resolution, but it requires a body to fulfill a very specific role, and you will be pleased to know that I’ve chosen you, darling Kat, to fulfill that role. ”
It wasn’t perhaps Azrion’s best explanation, but he didn’t think it warranted getting a package lobbed at his head. And yet, that’s exactly what the human did.
“How dare you,” she snarled and threw another.
He caught the next flying parcel. “I say, that did take quite a lot of mettle to ask, but I’m not sure how I dare—ah!” He knocked a letter out of the air just to have to duck from another heading straight for his eye.
“Just because we were being sold doesn’t mean we can actually be bought!”
As he caught another twine-tied projectile, he also latched onto the unfortunate conclusion she’d come to. “I’m not trying to buy you, just your company.”
“I don’t care how you say it—I’m not sleeping with you for coin!”
“Oh, good gods and brightest stars, Kat, no! I don’t mean the carnal act of mating!
” He snatched a particularly heavy letter with his tail and held up the packages in defense.
It was a significantly less than ideal way to begin, but at least she wasn’t cowering or trembling.
“I am looking for a partner—a business partner.”