Chapter 26 Custards
CUSTARDS
Davarox
Davarox was in a staring contest with a custard…
And he was losing.
“Don’t say it.”
Ember clicked her tongue. “Wasn’t going to say anything.”
“I followed the recipe.”
“You did.”
“And it’s a lumpy mess.”
“It is.”
“It’s the oven,” he grumbled, knowing full well it wasn’t the oven.
The human, whose kitchen he’d taken over, clearly wasn’t having it. “You said that the last four times.”
“Fifth time’s the charm.”
“Illustra burn me. Sev!”
“No, don’t get—” Dav snapped his fangs down when the red demon appeared almost instantaneously in the doorway. His single eye landed on the bubbling mess that could not be called custard, something like horror passing over his face.
But then Ember was stomping past Dav, ripping her apron off and slapping it against Sev’s chest. “Brooding grumps deal with brooding grumps. Stop avoiding each other and fix… whatever is going on here.”
As if there wasn’t already tension in the room—created and sustained by Dav alone—the presence of the very demon he’d been avoiding only added to Dav’s stress.
Not like it hadn’t been his damn idea to show up at his best friend’s cottage unannounced and spend the next four days in hiding.
Davarox turned away from the male, not only because of the similarities Sev shared with his twin, but so Dav could put his walls back up in preparation for the conversation he was certain would be happening.
But as Severath entered the kitchen and found a place at his table, Davarox remembered something in the years he’d spent in constant company with the other red sibling.
Severath was not a talker.
He was a starer.
With the one-eyed gaze locked on his back and the custard mocking his face, Dav’s shoulders slowly climbed higher and higher as he ignored the mounting silence. Outside, the crashing rain against the windows matched his inner turmoil.
His hands shook as he pushed the failed custards aside, trying to compare his mental list of ingredients to what he had left from the icebox and pantry.
Fuck, lists. Another reminder of his failings.
He glanced down at the bowl in front of him, the stray thought of shattering it in frustration passing before he pushed it aside and followed Severath to the table.
But just the sight of the red demon felt like Dav had been impaled by a mylioptera’s tail, body paralyzed as the monster feasted on him.
Starting at his heart.
He flopped onto the chair opposite his friend, burying his head in folded arms and let out a long sigh.
More silence greeted him.
Davarox wasn’t used to silence, at least one that felt like this.
Rosalind was great at silence, but her quiet wasn’t uncomfortable or heavy, even when she was challenging him with her all-knowing glare.
She was the harmony between him and Laz, a steady presence or sparkling light to match the excitable demon in their company.
The twin in front of him was neither for Dav, and while they were friends, perhaps it was the effect of brooding grumps wanting to elongate their pain and suffering that had Davarox finally lifting his head.
“The rain is really coming down—”
“I’m in love with your brother,” Dav blurted, then grimaced as Severath’s eye went wide.
Davarox’s cheeks burned. His knee bounced under the table. All of the energy he’d been shoving down was suddenly at the surface, begging to escape.
Or maybe that was his fight-or-flight instinct, leaning toward the latter when it came to the warrior. At least there was a table barrier between them, though it cut Dav off from any exit. Not that he’d get far in this rainstorm.
Sev’s surprise softened a fraction as he sank back in his chair, scratching his jaw as he seemed to contemplate the words. But it didn’t feel like anger, nor did the demon’s tail begin flicking in preparation for a fight.
And when Davarox was terrified that disappointment would take over, or fury, or even disgust, the oddest thing happened.
Severath smiled.
“Explains why the kitchen is covered in custards.”
Dav blinked, unable to form words.
“That was what he made, right?” Severath prompted. “When I ate the last one and you nearly snapped my horn over it?”
When Davarox didn’t answer, the red demon chuckled. “That actually makes a lot of sense now.”
“You’re… not mad?”
“That you’re in love with my brother? No. But considering you’ve been here for four days and not at your own place, or the bakery you own with him, should I be?”
Dav’s head fell back into his arms. “Probably.”
“I take it Laz knows?”
Dav grunted his affirmation.
“And he doesn’t feel the same?”
“No, he does. So does Rosalind. We were sort of… but not anymore. At least not with me.”
Sev cleared his throat. “Okay, was not expecting that. You’re going to have to give me a little bit more here.”
With a groan, Davarox peeled himself off the table and began, starting with the blightspawn cake and meeting Rose, all the way to him fleeing the noble’s party in shame. By the end of his explanation, his throat was raw and he felt like he might collapse.
But Severath listened quietly, mulled over the details, and then fell into another silence as he watched Dav dig his claws into his hair in frustration.
“I was so embarrassed,” Dav said, voice wobbling. “Usually I don’t have an audience—at least one I care about—listening to that.”
“And you think Lazerath and Rosalind believe what those nobles said?”
“What? No. But those sorts of comments… they won’t stop. I don’t want them suffering for my—”
“Your what? Color? Lack of magic?” Sev prompted, stare hard.
“Things like magic, horns, tails, eyes… It matters a lot to demons, even humans, who are frightened of the ugly things they see within themselves. It bothers them that their identities are so engrained in something they could lose, the idea of someone being happy without it makes them jealous. Seems to me you’re twice, even more, the demon those cowards are.
Laz and Rosalind saw that in you. They tried to stand with you, but you pushed them away. ”
“They deserve to be happy.”
“Sounds to me like they were… until you walked out.”
His mind flashed to the scolding he’d gotten from Rose the morning after Temptation—not for the first time since he’d holed up here—when she’d found out his intentions of leaving and strung so many expletives together along with tears, he’d promised he would never do such a thing.
Breaking promises and trust seemed to be his thing now.
When Davarox didn’t answer, Sev folded his hands on the table. “I assume the baking, the hiding, the forgetfulness as you burn your hand half a dozen times on a hot pan… you regret it?”
Dav scrubbed a hand over his jaw and nodded. “I don’t know how to face them again after what I did. I hurt them, and I can’t take it back, but… they hate me now. They have to.”
“Well, I think it would be hard to hate the demon you were meant to be soulbonded with. I don’t know Rosalind, but I do know a bit about Lazerath.
” He pushed out of his chair and left the kitchen, shuffling around in the front of the cottage before returning with a bundle in his hands.
He tossed it onto the table. “And I think Lazerath knows a bit about you.”
It was a stack of envelopes, each with Laz’s handwriting scrawled across the front.
Addressed to Davarox with Sev’s address.
And there were two dozen.
Dav glanced at Sev, trying to grapple with the thought that Laz had known. He’d known where Davarox had gone, even when Dav wanted to hide. “How long have you had these?”
“They started coming the morning after you arrived.”
“And you didn’t think to tell me he was writing?”
The scars around Sev’s eye covering twitched as he pointed back the way he’d come. “They were in the…bread box? We leave it open since the drayk decided that’s where mail goes. I just thought you were intentionally ignoring them.”
Dav shook his head, leafing through the letters. Of course Severath would fail to tell his guest there was a bread box, of all things, accumulating mail addressed to him.
But…
Lazerath had known.
Had written two dozen notes to him in four days. Short notes. Sometimes a paragraph. Sometimes three sentences.
Rosalind’s proposal was accepted. She misses you. So do I.
Sometimes one.
Come home, please.
Tears blurred Davarox’s vision as he folded his fingers over the last letter. “Now he thinks I hate him. Hate them. What am I supposed to do?”
“Well, this is Laz we’re talking about.”
Dav looked up to find Sev smirking.
“Grand gesture.”
Dav blinked, then looked out the window. Rain ran in torrents, blurring the glass and making it impossible to see anything beyond the gray darkness.
The idea settled, and a slow smile spread across his face.
A moment later, he was out of his chair, twisting around the table as the decision solidified.
“I didn’t mean right now,” Sev called after him.
“I owe you any cake you want!”
“You owe me a clean kitchen,” Ember corrected from her reclined position on the couch, but despite her sharp gaze, that was a smirk on her lips as Davarox flung the front door open and sprinted into the rain.
The first icy pellets stung his skin, and he partly regretted not grabbing a cloak, but minutes later, when he was still sprinting and his clothing stuck to his body, making every step heavy, he was just thankful he could keep his momentum up through Heck.
Turning the last corner, he nearly rolled an ankle in a puddle that was much deeper than he expected. But there was Lazerath’s apartment, light flickering in his second-story window, and Dav scooped up a handful of pebbles from the planter in a neighboring home and tossed one at the window.
Another.
“I’m a fucking asshole!” Davarox yelled, staring up as rain blurred his vision and streamed down his face. At this point, the numb was welcoming to slow his racing heart.
He tossed another pebble, this time catching a not-demon-shaped figure moving behind the window. “Rose! Baby, I’m so sorry.”
Dav panted, realizing in all his running, he’d never really figured out what he was going to say, only that he needed to say the words. They didn’t owe him even to listen, but as Rosalind’s shadow lingered, he had to at least try.
“I know I was an ass. I was scared, and that’s not an excuse, but it’s me realizing that… It’s you and Laz. You’re the only ones that matter, okay? I was just too dense to see it.”
He spread his arms wide, trying not to crumble when a second shadow didn’t appear at the window.
“I spent my life thinking I was broken, that I would never be loved, that I could never be enough. I couldn’t trust the good things in my life because I believed those demons.
I believed their cruel words when the ones that mattered were right there in front of me. ”
Dav shook his head, water spraying from his face and hair.
“I’ve always felt incomplete. Desperate for the male that I never thought could be my soulbonded.
But the truth is… that wasn’t why I was incomplete.
From the moment we met, he was always part of my soul, but I was missing something else. We were missing something more.”
He lowered his arms as he stared at Rosalind’s blurred shadow. “My soul was never split in half, Rose. It was in thirds. That empty part of me was just waiting for you, baby.”
Dav choked out a sob, fists balling at his sides.
“I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I need you both to know how sorry I am.
I love you. I love you so much. And I’m going to be better.
Maybe it’s too late for us, but I want you both to be happy, and if that means you never want to see my face again, I’ll respect that. ”
Davarox wasn’t quite sure where to go from there, especially when Rosalind was still lingering where she could see him.
Maybe he should get on his knees. He was desperate enough, but it wasn’t to guilt her into taking him back.
Especially because Lazerath still hadn’t appeared in the window.
That was fair. Dav deserved it. But he didn’t want to be the reason the two of them couldn’t be together.
Rosalind’s shadow shifted, and Dav’s heart filled with hope.
Only to be shattered as her figure disappeared.
Dav stared at the empty window, world crashing down around him like the rain, eroding all hope he’d clung to.
That was fair. Her presence for that long was more than he deserved.
Yet he couldn’t get his feet to move. To walk away in shame. He could blame the cold, how soaked he was, how waterlogged his boots were.
But really, it was his own fault. Brooding grumps liked to elongate their suffering, right?
Somehow, his brain connected to his muscles, forced his feet to flex and turn away.
Light spilled onto the street as the front door opened, and Dav’s head snapped around to find a tall red figure filling the doorway.
Lazerath looked beautiful with his body glowing in the demonlight, especially as he leaned against the jamb and gave Davarox an exasperated eye roll.
“Of course we forgive you, you fucking jerk,” Laz said, lips pulling into a smile. “If you’d read my letters, you’d know the door was unlocked for you.”
Rosalind’s tear-stained face slipped in beside Laz, and she gave Dav a wobbly smile. “Hurry up and get in here. Laz made way too many custards for us to eat ourselves.”