Chapter 30 Rupi
Thirty
Rupi
My sister looks at me like I just pushed her off a speeding bus.
“Did you come up here to find my earrings?” I say, trying to give her an out because she seems unable to make words. “They’re not in Prem’s room, silly. They’re in the guest room.” I turn to Prem’s mother, who looks so guilty, it’s like she’s the one—not her son—who cheated on me.
“Or, Mamma, maybe I put them in your room? Can you check for me, please?”
“Yes, yes, let’s go down,” she says. “I need your help with something too.”
Great. Now we’re both trying to take each other away from the crime scene.
“I’m right behind you,” I say, but she doesn’t budge. “I’m fine, really. I’m just going to check if they’re in the guest room.”
Time hangs while she decides if I’m being brave or stupid. Finally she turns and leaves with enough reluctance that I know I have just moments to turn this capsizing ship around.
“Why the hell didn’t you lock the door?” I hiss at my sister. Then turn to Prem. “Call Saj right now.”
“Why?” both Prem and Simi say together.
“Because we can’t tell Mamma the truth without making her an accomplice. And we can’t keep lying to her anymore.”
“Oh god,” Simi says. “You’re right. We can’t do that. We can’t tell her.”
“Can’t tell me what?” Great. She’s back. How fast does this woman move?
Simi looks up in horror. Then swallows, squares her shoulders, and steps in front of Prem and faces his mother. “I’m sorry you had to see that, Auntie. But there’s something you should know. This isn’t his fault.”
“Simi,” Prem says.
“No, Prem. Your mother deserves the truth. Let me talk,” she says.
Great, now she decides to be assertive with him.
She turns to his mother and dives in. “I’ve always been in love with Prem.
I met him when I started taking care of the girls, and well, it was instant.
I’d never met anyone like him, that gentle, kind, smart.
” Her eyes are shining. “For a long time, I didn’t say anything.
I couldn’t. I mean, look at him. What would someone like him ever see in me?
But we did become friends, and it just got worse.
He’s everything I’ve ever dreamed of. I kept wanting to tell him, but before I could, he met my sister.
You know the rest. He fell so hard. I was heartbroken. I was also angry.”
She turns to me. “Rupi’s always had everything I’ve wanted.
I shouldn’t have been surprised. Then you all met her, and not just Prem but all of you fell in love with her.
I was left out. For these past few months, it’s felt like my life is over.
Today when I came up, looking for her earrings, I ran into Prem in his room.
We started talking, and I realized once again what I had lost just because I didn’t tell him how I felt when I had the chance. I lost all sense of right and wrong.”
I squeeze her arm. “Simi.” I try to stop her.
“No, let me finish. You’ve always sacrificed for me.
” She throws my hand off with so much force, I stumble back.
“You’ve been through so much, and I’ve still been jealous.
I threw myself at him. I was the one who kissed him.
I practically attacked him. He was trying to push me away when you came into the room. ”
Prem groans. “Simi, don’t.”
“No, Prem. Stop trying to protect me. I know you’re doing it for Rupi. But stop.”
She turns to me again and takes both my hands. I grip her tightly and widen my eyes. Stop it!
“I’m sorry,” she says, then she yanks her hands away even as I struggle to hold on.
Prem’s mother’s gaze pings from Simi to me to Prem, then back again all the way. “Is she telling the truth, Prem?” she asks her son. The woman is too smart by half.
Prem looks at Simi with so much helplessness, I don’t know how she can stand it.
“No, she isn’t.” He squeezes his forehead with a shaking hand.
“Simi is one of the best people I’ve ever met.
” He takes a breath. “She . . . she had a weak moment.” Simi sags in relief.
Is it relief? “If you hadn’t come in right then, everything would have been okay. I would have managed to push her away.”
It’s amazing how good we’ve all gotten at telling these curated truths in a way that they’re essentially lies.
And it’s one person’s fault. Mine.
“So, if you’d been able to push her away without Rupi finding out, that would have been okay? So, just because Rupi doesn’t know that her sister is betraying her, that means everything is okay? Is that how truth works for you now, Prem?”
“Well, who does it help if the sisters lose each other?”
“It helps her.” Mamma points at Simi and gives her a scathing look. “She gets away with cheating her sister, who doesn’t deserve it. She gets away with violating her sister’s relationship.”
“You’re correct. I’m . . . I’m so sorry,” Simi says.
Mamma turns away from her.
Simi bites her lip, turns, and heads toward the stairs.
Prem looks like he wants to follow her, but no one wants this to blow up in the family’s face and hurt them. Supporting immigration marriage fraud is a criminal offense. There can be hefty fines, even jail time. To say nothing of the scandal it would cause in the community.
That’s never happening.
“Simi, wait,” I call after her. “Come back.”
Simi turns to me, her eyes filled with tears but also warning. She wants to be the one to make the sacrifice, to be the one to protect me. But to hell with that. It’s not a contest. It never has been.
Only one person can fix this. Just like only one person could fix the shit that was our childhood. It’s not Simi’s fault that she never got to be that person.
“Simi wasn’t the one violating her sister’s relationship.” I look away from her and turn to Prem’s mom. “She wasn’t the one who was betraying her sister.”
“What are you talking about, beta?” Tanuja says with all the gentleness that made me imprint on her like a baby chick.
I soak up the way she’s looking at me, because it’s the last time she ever will.
“Simi hasn’t betrayed anyone,” I say. “I have.”