Chapter Thirteen
Kami
“ G ood. We’re alone now.” Ian’s mom relaxes onto the pillow of the hospital bed. “Again, I’m sorry for taking him away from you.”
This woman collapses without any warning, and she’s saying she’s sorry? “There’s no need to apologize, Mrs. Brown. All of us are just glad you’re okay.”
He could love you like that if you let him.
The possibility of a man like Ian to care for me that deeply, ready to do whatever is needed, fills me with warmth.
“I know my two boys are more than glad. Ian especially.” She cringes. “How did Ian react to the phone call?”
I debate with myself. Do I tell this woman the truth or do I try to sugarcoat? I don’t have the heart to lie to her, but I don’t want to give her anything more to worry over either.
“You can be honest. Let me guess. He drove like a maniac to get here.”
“Like a race car driver,” I admit.
She rolls her eyes “I swear, that boy. I can’t blame him, though. My health hasn’t been the best until recently. Ian, like his father, has always been the one who drops everything for everyone. So selfless and stubborn at the same time. I’m sorry you had to see that. If it helps at all, he’s probably feeling mortified as well.”
I always thought I’d be too afraid to meet any guy’s parents. Would I not be good enough for their son? Do I look funny? Am I too damaged? But facing this fear and realizing it was all in my head has me wondering if I’ve been letting my fear dictate my life for too long.
“It’s no trouble. I can see your son loves you very much.”
Ian’s brother, Matt, further confirmed this to me when we were over at the vending machines. Reminding me so much of a younger version of Ian, Matt had the same eyes, smile, and charisma, only perhaps carrying a different kind of wisdom than his older brother.
I’d look over at Ian every couple of seconds as he paced back and forth. Despite the tense circumstances, I liked talking with Matt about anything and everything. We talked the most about Ian.
“He’ll be okay. He’s been through much worse, trust me,” Matt assured me.
“To take care of a cancer patient for as long as he did, I can’t imagine how on edge he is.”
“Once he has updates from the doc and sees Mom, he’ll start going back to normal.”
“The last decade must have been hard on both of you.”
“When Mom was first diagnosed, it was him and Dad who took care of her. They were a team. But when he died, Ian devoted all his time and energy into taking care of Mom, the house, and the business. I could barely get him to take a break.”
In a way, he had to.
I looked back at the man I’d come to know as charming, snarky, and sweet, only to come face to face with someone riddled with anxiety and fear all because of one phone call. All I seem to want to do now is take his pain away.
But why? What is it about me that’s so special to him, let alone brings him back to the land of the living? Have I truly made such an impact that he’s become motivated to start planning and promising himself a better future? A future with me? That question was answered when the doctor came in, and Ian told her I was his wife.
“Mrs. Brown…” I start.
“Please, call me Jenny.”
“Okay…Jenny.”
Jenny smiles. Something about this woman puts me at ease.
“I know what you must be thinking,” she speaks softly. “My son, someone you barely know, has introduced you to his family when you’re still not sure how you feel.’”
I’m shocked. It’s like she’s reading my mind.
She continues, “I understand you met Ian as a…one-time thing.”
I cringe. “Yes, I did.” It’s not every day you talk with the mother of the guy you had sex with about the very sex you had with him.
“I’m sure you know this by now, but my son can be very direct about what he wants. And usually when he sees something he likes, he’ll be open about it and show how determined he is to get it. Not to say he always doesn’t take no for an answer, just that he’s not the type to give up easily.”
“I’ve definitely seen that.” The Halloween party comes to mind.
“It’s how he’s always been, but I know for others his directness and honesty can be a bit…blunt at times.”
She isn’t wrong.
“You’ve raised a very amazing man.” I do admit, his honesty and determination are the things about him that have gotten my attention.
“What do you think of him? Speak honestly. I don’t mind,” she assures me.
“How much has he told you about…him and me?” Saying it like that feels weird, yet strangely right.
“Enough to know he wants you for you.”
“He does?”
“But you’re not sure whether to trust yourself.” She finishes my sentence for me.
Damn, she’s good. I give a slight nod.
“I was around your age when I first met Ian’s father. The man, like Ian, was just as adamant on having me go out with him. So much so, he insisted on escorting me from class to class on campus for a whole week until I said yes. Like you, I was cautious. I’d been in crappy relationships before, and I didn’t want to let myself down again. But I couldn’t deny my curiosity, either. I didn’t have many close bonds with people growing up, but Michael was the first person that got me to open up. So sweet, incredibly loyal, and he had seemingly infinite patience. Over time, I fell in love with him. I was absolutely terrified confessing that to him, but our trust in each other carried me through my fear. Though the pain of losing him was terrible, I’d fall head over heels for him all over again if I had the chance.”
The kind of bond Jenny had with her husband is as beautiful as if I were reading a romance novel. Their deep affection reminds me of my parents’ relationship before it was torn to shreds, never to be mended. Can love like that exist for a lifetime? Or are Jenny and her late husband the exception, not the rule?
She continues, “I might be a bit biased as his mother, but Ian would do anything for his loved ones. Hell, he’d rather take care of others before himself. He’s a rock to those in need and never hesitates to drop everything when someone needs help.” She pauses. “I don’t mean to tell you what to do, but life is about taking chances. Are we really living our lives if we don’t experience heartache, disappointment, humility, or joy?”
Everything I’ve learned about Ian is holding true to both Jenny’s and Matt’s words. If Ian was truly the person I’d originally made him out to be, he wouldn’t have taken the time out of his life to spend time with me. Everything would have ended the way it was supposed to: in that hotel room once the sun came up.
The thought of falling for the Ian his mom and brother have told me is as scary as going down a dark unfinished basement. I don’t know what I’m walking into, and I can’t be sure if I’ll make it out alive. Then again, Jenny felt the same way, and her husband was there to guide her through the darkness. Should I take that same leap of faith with Ian?
I feel the tug, the connection, he has on my heart. It hasn’t faltered. Instead, it’s strengthened from its tiny sprouts to a more solid stem. Still small but perhaps here to stay a little while longer.
Jenny’s advice is strange and slightly awkward, especially when I’ve just met the woman, but I feel like it was also something I needed to hear. Food for thought, at least.