Chapter 28
In general, Thane preferred taking action to sitting around. But ever since his last moment with Cat, when she told him what she thought of him and what he deserved, he was useless. He barely slept, he didn’t eat. He couldn’t let anyone say more than two words before he snapped at them.
Thane was utterly and completely miserable, in a way that he hadn’t known it was possible to be.
He’d experienced melancholy, and even abject despair during the war, as nearly every soldier had.
But this was somehow worse. Perhaps it was because he was at home, during peacetime, and hadn’t adequately prepared himself for the blow.
Or perhaps it was because it involved a woman.
It was a first for him to have his heart broken.
Or perhaps, and this was the most likely, his misery was the direct result of him making a monumental mistake.
And then repeating that mistake multiple times.
His confession to Cat had come far too late, and he was aware that merely saying the words out loud didn’t absolve him of everything he had done.
But he had allowed himself to hope that her reaction would be tempered by the knowledge that he loved her.
That wasn’t what had happened. He wasn’t even sure she believed him when he told her how much he had come to care about her in such a short time.
But then, why would she? Cat was right to denounce him, and she was right to punish him for the way he’d taken advantage of her trust. No wonder she’d fled to Effie’s home.
Thane nearly chased after her, but he was too afraid of what she’d say when he saw her.
But that didn’t mean the punishment hurt any less.
Thane would do nearly anything for her forgiveness; unfortunately, he’d have to perform the miracle of bringing Brodie back to life to achieve it, and that was a power he didn’t have.
No one had it. All of which left Thane even more miserable than before.
The other men at first attempted to cheer him up, but it was a losing proposition. So they left him alone to brood, applying the usually trusty theorem that time would heal whatever his wounds happened to be.
The morning of the third day after Cat had fled to his sister’s house, one of the lads who worked in the stable came to see Thane, a pinched expression on his face.
“What is it?” asked Thane.
“A horse has come back to the stable,” the boy told him, keeping his eyes downcast and nervously shuffling his feet.
“Was a horse missing?” There were still occasionally reavers working in the Highlands, usually small bands of men unable to find any honest work. But it was rare, and Thane hadn’t heard any reports of thefts from neighbors since he returned.
“It’s the horse Miss Ross used to go to your sister’s.” Now the boy looked up, and Thane could see the concern in his eyes.
“Effie keeps a good stable. I’m sure the boys there wouldn’t let the horse run loose, but it’s possible that the creature wanted to come home and found its own way during the night.
” Even as Thane said the words, he didn’t believe them.
The image of Cat lying on the ground after having been thrown from the horse came to his mind.
She was a competent rider, but an accident could happen to anyone.
And if Cat had been riding with Effie, his sister would’ve sent word if there had been any incident.
So she must’ve ridden alone, which meant that if she was injured or worse—he didn’t allow himself to consider what or worse would be—the situation required immediate action.
“Saddle my horse,” said Thane to the boy. “I’m riding to my sister’s.”
The boy practically saluted, and dashed away.
Thane lost little time in throwing on boots suitable for riding, and then made his way toward the stables.
He hesitated only slightly when he heard the voices of Duncan and Kai in one of the rooms, where they were probably relaxing or enjoying a card game.
First, he would find out what had happened to Cat.
If a search party was required, then he would involve his friends.
The situation with Cat was his own secret shame, and he hated the idea of turning it into a public spectacle.
Not that his friends couldn’t be trusted, but Thane needed to see Cat’s face above all.
He couldn’t make a coherent decision without knowing what she wanted, without knowing if she was well.
Once astride his horse, Thane rode fast all the way to Effie’s home. He didn’t see any sign of Cat along the way, nor did he notice any unusual activity among Effie’s servants. Perhaps there was another explanation for why the horse had returned. Perhaps he was allowing his imagination to run away.
As he slowed his horse, a footman came outside and nodded to him.
“Good morning, sir.” The man was polite, but puzzled. “The mistress is still in bed, as far as I know. Is she expecting you?”
“No, I didn’t send word. In fact, I am hoping to speak to Miss Ross.”
“Sir?”
“Miss Ross. The young lady who is staying here. Has my sister been hosting so many guests that it gets confusing? Miss Ross has black hair and dresses in all black. You can’t fail to notice her.”
“Won’t you come inside to the parlor, sir?” He gestured for one of the stable boys who had already approached to mind Thane’s horse. “I’ll let the mistress know that you’re here.”
Thane followed the footman into the house and walked into the pretty parlor room that Effie generally used. The footman went along upstairs, presumably to alert both Effie and Cat that he was here.
There was something odd about the footman’s reaction to what Thane thought was a basic request. Was it possible that Cat had somehow conveyed to the household staff here that she was never to be at home to Thane?
On the one hand, it seemed an almost absurd extension of command: for a guest to insist on such a thing as telling the brother of the home’s mistress who would or would not receive him.
But on the other hand, Cat had every reason to avoid Thane.
She’d already demonstrated that by going to Effie’s in the first place.
And he could easily imagine servants being swayed by the idea of a young lady in distress and wishing to remain unseen by a man who had troubled her.
Even though Thane was the person they knew, and not Cat, who until two weeks ago didn’t even exist for them.
Edinburgh may as well be in America for all the influence the city’s society had here in the Highlands.
Well, the women would be down soon, and then he would discover what was going on.
After a few moments, his sister walked into the room, looking like she really had just woken.
“Thane, have you grown lonely for my company already? I had assumed you had much else to occupy your mind.”
“Effie, I’ve got to speak with Miss Ross.”
His sister looked at him with a strange expression. “Why are you telling me such a thing? I assume you’re not asking for permission or advice.”
He shook his head. “I’m not in a position to ask for either. Just tell her to get down here.”
“What? I haven’t the slightest idea where she is. Don’t tell me you mislaid her.”
“She left a note saying she was staying here with you!”
Effie’s eyes widened. “Here? No, Thane. I haven’t seen her since I returned home.”
“And I haven’t seen her since she left home. That’s almost three days ago.” Thane cursed. Where was Cat? The distance between the siblings’ homes was relatively short, but there was still plenty of space to get into trouble.
“We’ll get to the bottom of this.” Effie rang a bell on the table next to her and a maid hurried in.
“Ma’am?”
“Ask everyone if a young lady has called at the house anytime in the past three days. Her name is Miss Ross.”
The maid curtseyed and left.
Effie gave Thane a worried smile. “I’m sure there’s an explanation.”
“The horse Cat was riding returned to Kinlochlie,” he told her. “We should find out from the stable if any of your horses are gone.”
“We’ve only got two,” Effie said.
A quick query to the servants confirmed both horses were calmly cropping grass, exactly where they should be. “So horse thieving does not appear to be rampant,” she noted.
“If she rode somewhere else and the horse she used has returned,” Thane said, “we’re looking at up to a day and a half’s ride. That could get her to Inverness.”
“Alone? Catriona’s a fine rider,” Effie said.
“But she surely couldn’t ride any great distance, particularly without some escort or protection.
There would be far too many questions. And she’d have had to sleep one night on the way.
Where would she have done that? She knows no one up in the Highlands, and… does she have money?”
Thane shrugged. “We have to assume she does. Christ, what was she thinking?”
Effie crossed her arms. “Well? What was she thinking? What might have set her off three days ago?”
Thane looked at his sister, realized she would never believe anything but the truth, and sighed. “We fought.”
“Oh, dear. Over what?”
“I told her something that upset her.”
Effie’s eyebrow lifted. “Upset?”
“It’s difficult to explain quickly. I did offer to marry her as well. Which also upset her. Not as much as the other thing.”
“Thane, you’re being uncharacteristically coy. Tell me what you did to evoke such a drastic response.”
“Effie, if I died, and then someone came to you and announced that he had killed me, what would you do?”
His sister blinked in confusion. “What sort of question is that?”
“A hypothetical one! Just tell me.”
“I’d probably want to throw something at him. Or have him arrested. Or kill him myself, I suppose.”
“Now imagine the man who told you this was…close to you.”
“How close?”
“What if it was Robbie who told you?”
“He would never!”
“Effie. Answer me.”