CHAPTER IX #12
His brown eyes capture and hold mine, not caring to look at Desmond or Golem to see if they’re complying with his command.
The Master Informer gives his brother a small smirk and pushes off the wall, while Golem quietly takes his leave and heads towards the balcony.
I remain transfixed under Keane’s gaze and hold my breath until Desmond closes the door behind him, barely noticing as Golem disappears into the shadows at the same time.
“I will have you now, Alexis.”
I take a deep breath and look down at Keane’s hands, truly wanting nothing more than to feel them all over my body. But I will not sacrifice his promise of the Shadow Oak. He will not have me now.
“No,” I shake my head.
“No?” he raises a brow, “I can see that you want it.”
When you look at me like that, how can I not?
Heat crawls up my neck as I reach for the blanket that fell on the ground. I quickly pick it up and wrap it around my body, shielding myself from his gaze.
“You think that’ll help?” he chuckles.
Keane takes a commanding step in my direction, eyes never leaving mine as he moves around the settee.
I grip the blanket tighter and try to calm my racing heart, thinking of the words I need to say that’ll stop this from going any further.
My body may be aching to feel his touch, but my mind is resolved in saving myself for Gaumond.
I look up at Keane when he stops in front of me, nearly losing that resolve when his brown eyes turn from pure desire to playful mischief.
He reaches up to the front of my chest and swiftly pulls the blanket down, letting it drop to the ground with a handsome smirk as he reaches back up to grasp my jaw.
I narrow my eyes and swat him away in warning, my own lips turning into a scowl when he smiles in amusement.
His hand quickly finds a place on the back of my neck as he pulls me forward, his other hand settling on my hip to hold me flush to his chest.
“No, Alexis?” he grins down at me.
I bite my lip and nod.
“And why not?”
He knows why.
I’m about to remind him of his promise but end up getting lost in his eyes instead. I lean my head back in his hand and stare up at this beautiful Discerni Prince, truly wanting him just as much as he wants me.
But I also can’t deny that I want more.
Something new burned inside me tonight after seeing him engaging with multiple women.
I hated that I had to hide my attraction to him, hated how I just had to watch and hope for him to come to me in secrecy after.
That’s not the relationship that I want with him, especially not after the pure honesty we laid bare at the Shadow Oak.
I open my mouth to tell him that, to give him a little piece of the feelings I have for him, but Keane is quick to stop my words with the softest touch of his hand.
He slowly traces his thumb over my lips and then presses it into my mouth, his own lips tipping up in a smile before the digit pushes down on my tongue.
Ancients.
I close my lips and bite down on his finger, scowling again when he
smirks.
“That will not help you either,” he laughs.
Fuck me, I need this man.
No, I need to tell him how I feel…
But I can’t form the words because everything about me is burning for him.
He’s so easy to get lost in, so confident in his movements that it makes me react the same way.
Instead of saying the words that I know will put a pause on this situation, I hold his fiery brown gaze and roll my tongue around his thumb, sucking him in even farther.
“There you are, trouble,” he smiles.
Keane loosens his grip on my hip, his hand snaking around to my ass and pulling my torso flush into his. I moan at the sudden movement and release his finger, feeling the full of his length pressing between my thighs.
Ancients, I need to get out of his pull. There’s no denying Keane when he’s like this.
I place my hands on his chest and grip his tunic, shaking my head in another denial even as my hips thrust into his.
“You will have me under the Shadow Oak, Keane, and not a moment sooner.”
The ground below us begins to shake, the rumble sending small vibrations up my body as Keane wraps both of his arms firmly under my ass.
“Apparently I didn’t make myself clear last night, Alexis. There are many, many other ways to have you that will not violate our Shadow Oak.”
Fuck. Me.
Keane picks me up with a chuckle and squeezes my ass before he dips down to grab the blanket on the ground. He throws it over my shoulders and presses me tighter into his hold, then starts walking us towards the balcony.
“Keane… wait.”
I pull back in his arms and look down at him, ready to bare a piece of my heart that might be too much too soon.
The Prince meets my glance with a look of pure hunger in his eyes, his purposeful steps ignoring my request as he walks into the chill of the night.
I wiggle into him and surround myself in his warmth, shivering when he places a needy kiss on my neck.
He sits us down on the single chair outside and guides me to straddle his lap, his hands moving up from my ass to grip my hips again.
“Why do you try to deny this, Alexis?” he murmurs, lips falling below my jaw, “what about this needs waiting?”
I groan and close my eyes, relishing in the hunger of his lips moving across my skin.
“There’s no denying this, Keane, it’s just…”
My words trail off when his tongue flicks at the bruise on my neck.
Keane grins at my shiver and sucks the sensitive spot harder into his mouth, his teeth nipping down in response when my hips start to rock on top of him.
He brings a hand to the back of my head and fists my hair possessively, holding me in the way he wants as his torturous lips send me into a breathless mess.
“Wait,” I moan, “I need…”
The Prince thrusts his cock against my clit, hearing my plead but listening to the way my body reacts instead.
My hands start to rake through his hair, my hips grinding into his in a steady rhythm as I tilt my neck even farther to the side to embrace the sure movements of his lips.
I’m positively needy for him, but my mind is still reminding me of what I want to say. What I need to say.
“Keane,” I moan again when his hand darts up to squeeze my breast, “wait.”
The Prince pulls away at the desperation in my voice. His hands move to the sides of my face in a tender caress, his eyes looking back at me full of concern.
“Alexis… I’m sor-”
“-No,” I shake my head, “no apologies. You aren’t doing anything wrong…”
“Then what’s going on?” he asks, thumbs skimming across the sides of my jaw.
I sigh and let my nails skim down his neck, “I just… I can’t do this, Keane. We can’t do this. I don’t want to be with you like this. It’s stolen...”
And quick. And hidden.
The two of us are quite literally hiding in the dark alcoves of the balcony not knowing if Alanna will show up at any moment. I don’t want that with him. I don’t want anything that resembles what I had with Troy. Every single part of me wants more.
“You’re right,” he nods quietly, “you’re so right.”
I sigh and let my forehead fall on his.
“So stay with me tonight…”
I groan and squeeze the back of his neck.
Ancients, I want to. More than anything.
But…
“I can’t do that,” I whisper.
“Why?”
I smile sadly to myself, hating how my next words will be perceived.
“We will be seen.”
Keane removes his hands from my jaw and falls back into the chair. He looks at me silently, coolly, as the cold features of Discerni indifference start to take over his face. I stare back at that face and search for any other reaction to my words, hoping he’ll inquire into their meaning.
But the Prince gives me nothing, and when the silence and calm disinterest becomes too much, I move off of him with a sigh, though I swear I see a hint of anger and hurt behind his gaze when I do.
Ask me! I silently yell when he stands up and starts to walk away, ask me why I’ve given you that answer!
Keane stops at the open archway leading back into the room, almost as if he’s heard me. His body tenses for a moment before he turns back around, his voice demandingly quiet.
“It bothers you? Being seen with me?”
“No,” I let out a breath, “it does not bother me, Keane.”
I just don’t think you’re ready for what it means to be seen with me.
And therein lies the problem, what I want him to understand but find it too hard to explain so soon. I want to be seen with him. I want to do this right. My desire is too strong to keep hidden or to settle for stolen encounters. I don’t want to settle for touches that will end in more secrecy.
I want to pursue whatever this is with him, and I want to do it in honesty. I don’t know how that will work out with him being the Prince Heir, but I do know that I don’t want to be seen as just another woman or conquest in his sheets.
So how do I tell him that without baring my soul?
How do I tell him how I feel without scaring him away?
We’ve known eachother for such a small amount of time, and yet I know what my soul yearns for. To the core of my being, I truly will not settle for anything less.
So I don’t know that I can tell him.
Not yet, at least.
Keane watches me from the end of the balcony, his brown eyes searching my gaze with intensity. He must see something in my face that makes him take a hard step forward, and then another, because he’s crossing the space between us so quickly that I gasp in surprise.
“I will have you…” he states, his hand reaching for the back of my neck again as he looks at me with a seriousness I’ve never seen before.
“You will,” I nod.
It’s inevitable.
“I will have you, Alexis,” he repeats, “and then I will make you mine.”