CHAPTER XI #4
I can tell he doesn’t want to divulge any more on that part of the story so I let it go and sigh back into my arms. Keane releases a breath and keeps his fingers moving in a steady caress, finishing his story.
“McQuoid led us all back through the mountain city and into the fortress while Clair set up this guest room on a private wing. You’ve been asleep for a full day. It’s nearly sundown right now, day four.”
“Did you carry me all the way from the library to here?” I ask, closing my eyes.
“Yes,” he replies softly.
His fingers stop their motions on my back as his palm timidly flattens against my skin.
“Alexis,” he begins quietly.
“Hmm?”
“Had you been crying?”
Ancients.
I must’ve looked such a mess for him to notice that. I open my eyes and push off the tub, grateful for his sturdy touch behind me.
“I was properly bawling,” I nod.
“Why?” he frowns.
I avert my gaze back to the water and slowly lift my knees to my chest. Keane moves his hand around my shoulder and slips two fingers under my chin, angling my gaze back on him.
The kindness in his eyes as he looks at me does so much more damage than he knows.
They remind me too much of his father’s…
of the man who I will have to go home to empty-handed.
I try to turn away from his gaze but he holds my chin in place.
“Talk to me, Alexis.”
Shame washes over me, as does the same disappointment I felt on that thirty-second height. I watch in my mind as the corners of the book turn into ash over and over again, the book disintegrating into nothing and leaving me with no proof that I found what he was looking for.
How will I tell Zander? How can I even begin to explain what happened?
Will his eyes no longer look at me with the same kindness as his son’s do now?
Perhaps he’ll kick me out of Castle Bardot.
Oh, Ancients, what a thought. I may really have to take Yara up on her offer of employment in Fumagalli.
But at least I’ll be close to Keane.... unless he thinks I’m a failure, too.
Fuck, I don’t think I could live with that.
The tug of his fingers brings me back to him, his eyes darting back and forth over my face in real concern.
“Whatever it is, Alexis, you do not need to fear telling me.”
Those words send every emotion rolling out of me.
“I failed him,” the whisper comes out in admittance, “the book did exactly what he feared. It turned to ash, Keane. Right in my hands.”
Keane watches me with kindness and shakes his head as a small, sad smile reaches his lips.
“I, more than anyone in this Old World, know what you are feeling right now. I have felt it countless times growing up, Alexis. My father is not a man that you like to disappoint.”
He leans over the tub and kisses me gently on the forehead, “but don’t let it worry you. There will be an explanation for the book. For all of this. Of that I can guarantee.”
I stare at the Prince in quiet shock.
Elder Father and Mother, what did I do right in my life to meet this man?
“Come on,” he stands from the stool and reaches for the towel below him, “they’ll be expecting us.”
Golem stands outside the door of the guest room when we leave, watching me with curious eyes. I give him the longest hug to date and hold him tightly as I whisper against his robes.
“I’m sorry for frightening you, Golem.”
He nods against my shoulder and tightens his embrace in return.
The floor we’re on is indeed more private and secluded than the one I shared with Alanna.
There’s less maids and Pyrenese roaming the halls, and I can tell we’re higher up in the fortress as the grey stone of the mountain gives off a cooler chill then where I had stayed previously.
I follow Keane down the hall with the baby beast purring against my neck and walk under a stone archway.
“Thank Ancients,” Cal’s voice booms from inside the room on the other side.
He pushes away from a massive stone table and quickly stands up. The two of us immediately head towards eachother and end up in a hug, my friend’s large arms wrapping around me as he holds on tight.
I don’t know how long we stand holding eachother, but I nearly start crying at the intensity of him. His large hands reach down my back in affectionate rubs until I’m breathing properly again, and it’s only then that he finally pulls back and brings his hands to my shoulders.
“You alright then, Alex?”
“I’m alright,” I nod with a smile, “could probably go for a drink right now, or three, but I’m alright.”
Cal chuckles and hugs me again, then passes me off to Holis who also gives me a tight and surprising squeeze.
“You had us all worried for a moment, Alexis,” he states softly, pulling back as his brother approaches from the side. Mana has a small grimace on his lips, his eyes darting to the bruises on my face, but he quickly shrugs the look away and gives me a rare smile.
“By far the most interesting travel to date.”
I laugh at my usually silent companion and nod in agreement.
Mana steps to the side as I take in the rest of the room, spotting the Prince and Princess standing at the head of the table.
Their snow tigers are casually laying on the ground near their chairs, their white fur ruffling slightly from a breeze that’s fluttering in from a balcony behind them.
Desmond is here, as is Morose, the old woman walking straight towards me with her cat-like eyes narrowing.
“You look like you will fall on your feet at any moment, young one. Have you eaten?”
I shake my head and watch as she turns to Prince McQuoid. “Why hasn’t anyone fed this girl yet?”
“Relax, grandmother,” McQuoid rolls his eyes, “we have dinner coming for all of us soon.”
“You better,” Morose quips.
She looks back at me, solemn and serious, and reaches for my hands.
“I will never forget the sight of you in that room, Alexis... you were the best of humanity, so raw in your emotions that I thought you would shatter the ice around you.”
I stare at the Duhni, my breath catching in my chest as she continues.
“I have known you for a short period of time, young one, but I have no doubt that you will indeed shatter the Old World around us as we all know it.”
The bird on my shoulder gives a small chirp in agreement. I stand frozen in response, not knowing what to say.
My eyes immediately move around the room to find Keane. He’s watching the two of us with his arms folded over his chest, his own eyes narrowed and intense.
“Thank you for everything, Morose,” I bow deeply, “I’m sorry I worried you and Golem.”
“You did what you had to do, girl. Do not apologize for it.”
Prince McQuoid clears his throat, “if we’ve all said our hellos, I think it’s time we heard from Lady Alexis her account of the last three days.”
Morose gives me a final look-over before turning back to the table, walking towards her seat as everyone else does the same.
I look around the table and catch Princess Clair pulling out an empty chair at her right, smiling in my direction.
I take the seat just as Keane sits at McQuoid’s side with Desmond next to him and Cal next to me.
All eyes turn to look at me once everyone is seated.
“Come on, then,” I sigh at the attention and slowly bring my hand up to my shoulder, “you need to make introductions with the rest of the crew.”
The baby beast purrs into my neck and digs his talons in deeper, not wanting to move.
“You can’t hide forever,” I tell him sternly.
The bird pushes against my neck again, completely comfortable where he is. I bring my finger up and gently caress the top of his beak, smiling at the purr that grows louder as he gently nips at my skin.
My eyes immediately rush to Morose.
“You said he is the Bird of Ash, father to the firehawks, yes?”
Morose’s milky blue eyes narrow on my shoulder as she nods.
“And what do firehawks eat?”
The baby beast finally steps onto my finger, his wings expanding fully at his sides in a proud stretch for the room to see.
“Meat,” Princess Clair replies, “lizards, mice, crickets, grasshoppers. I’ve seen many attack and feast on a snake if they’re big enough.”
I nod at her in appreciation and set the baby beast down on the table.
“I’ll need to take a walk into the town’s forest tonight, then.”
“I don’t believe that’ll sustain this little beast,” Morose shakes her head, “from what I’ve been reading over the last day he may need red meat, raw red meat, and lots of water.”
I turn to the Prince and Princess and see McQuoid already standing from his seat.
“I’ll let the boys know to bring something with dinner,” he nods and walks off.
“Thank you,” I smile, looking at the bird again. His yellow eyes stare back at me, his chest puffing up proudly as a few Pyrenese boys walk into the room and bring in a round of drinks. Cal turns in his seat and accepts two mugs for us before quickly placing one in my hand.
“How did this happen, Lady Alexis?” McQuoid asks when he returns, “how did you come about this creature?”
I take a deep drink of ale and reach out to the proud chest in front of me, stroking the soft feathers as the bird purrs even more.
“I’m fairly certain that he was born from the ash in my hands. It crystalized into a hot ember that nearly resembled an egg. He pushed himself out of it with a force that mirrored the sounds in the sky…”
I shake my head, recognizing that I must sound a bit crazy, but then remember the red ember and the black cracks that matched the booming from above.
“It was extraordinary.”
“Born from ash,” Princess Clair murmurs, “do you mean the ash that fell from the storm?”
The little beast chirps as I remain quiet, the memory of him and the book that provided the ash still stirring my guilt.
“Some,” I nod, looking to Morose to change the subject, “what else have you been reading about him?”
The old woman stares at the bird in quiet awe.