CHAPTER XIX #2
I relax into his strong comfort, letting his arms around my waist hold me in assurance. It’s just the two of us here in this moment… the two of us doing what we often do when we find ourselves under the canopy of trees. Challenging eachother. Questioning eachother. Talking with eachother.
So where to even start?
My mind races and replays everything we spoke about with the King earlier. There are so many questions I have for him, so many things that him and I need to navigate together. But there is only one question that continues to shadow all others, the most important of them all…
“Do you want me to practice magic, Keane?” I ask quietly.
Keane shifts behind me and brings his hands down to my thighs, moving his fingers in a gentle caress. He lets a few moments pass between us as he considers his reply, his quiet presence weighing his next words.
I feel his face set into a grimace as he opens his mouth and then closes it. The silence between us turns heavy, and I start wondering if we’re actually ready to have this conversation.
“I have been and am prepared to take you as you are,” he finally replies, voice calm and strong, sure of his words.
My heart literally bursts at his answer, but I know it isn’t the full of
it. “…But?”
“But I cannot deny wanting you in my life for as long as possible, Alexis,” he finishes steadily.
I sigh at the answer I so desperately needed.
Keane wants me in his life, his extended Discerni life, for as long as possible. But he is also prepared to take me as I am.
Ancients.
I close my eyes and tilt my head farther back, letting the battle of my heart and mind take over…
Practicing any magic goes against everything I advocate for in humanity. It alludes to the knowledge that I believe humans are less than the magical beings, and affirms that we need more to make us special. More to make us equals…
But we’re already equals, because the difference in lifespans does not dictate our worth in the Old World.
“Do you understand my dilemma?” I ask on another sigh, opening my eyes to look up at his kind brown ones.
Keane gives me a sad smile and nods his head, “I do.”
“And you will understand if I choose not to practice magic?”
“I will,” he nods again, never breaking my gaze.
I press into his strong chest, feeling so much anguish at that promise.
“I don’t like this.”
“It is not unknown…” Keane replies strongly, leaning down to plant a soft kiss on my head, “it does happen, Alexis. Desmond and Alanna’s parents are proof of that. The Court of Warriors is full proof of that.”
Ancients. Alanna’s father.
My heart cries out for him and the short story she told me on the balcony of Red Falls. How could I bring something like that into Keane’s life? I have no desire to see him seclude himself when I am gone, especially with his status and the man he is to become.
But wouldn’t I do the same? Wouldn’t I isolate myself from those around me and find a quiet and unbothered life in hopes of forgetting what life was like with him?
“Talk to me,” Keane squeezes my thighs.
“I’m thinking of what Alanna has told me of her father,” I sigh and close my eyes again.
Keane tenses for a moment and then swiftly brings a hand to my chin, pulling my face directly up to his and demanding that I look at him. I open my eyes timidly and find a confident man looking back at me.
“If I find half of what Vickam found in Maren, I would consider myself a lucky man.”
“Vickam? The pub owner in Fumagalli?”
“Yes,” Keane smiles.
Interesting.
The Discerni man looked okay when I last saw him. He was definitely quiet, but I didn’t see any sadness lingering on his features. There was no harrowing look that led me to believe he was not well or emotionally broken.
“I spoke to him when we were there,” Keane continues softly, the words stilling my heart in my chest, “I inquired into his life. He has no regrets of his time with Maren. Nor, do I know, would I.”
“You will watch me grow old,” I nearly cry out.
“Yes, Alexis,” Keane nods, eyes holding mine with determination, “if that is the price to pay for having you in my life, I will happily watch you grow old.”
I tremble in his arms, unable to comprehend how he can say those words with such resolve. Is he truly prepared for something like that? Could anyone be prepared?
What would happen to us when I’m an old woman and he remains a beautiful Discerni Prince? Would his eyes greet mine with the same fire as they do now?
Yes, my heart confirms.
But will they look at me with the same desire as they do now?
A shiver rakes its way down my spine, not having nor wanting an answer for that.
“What did your father mean when he said that practicing magic would extend my life?” I whisper.
Keane runs his hands down my thighs, “the magic of the Old World lives within us, it is what prolongs the lives of the Discerni. The strongest of our summoners live the longest, but even those of magical descent who only practice small magic are still graced with extended life. Any use of summoning by you will no doubt prolong your human life. Your blood will flow with the magic that extends it.”
“To that of a Discerni?”
“I’m unsure, but I don’t believe so. I do suspect that you’d have a longer than average human life, though.”
Keane gives me a small grin, enjoying the thought. I consider his explanation and what it would mean to have a longer than average human life. I would get to spend more years with Keane.
But only me…
What of Cal and the other humans in the Four Kingdoms who choose not to embrace the mystics? What is Hirovale’s plan for them?
“But the choice will be yours, Alexis. Always. I will not allow the Ancient to force his will on you.”
“He already has, though, Keane,” I sigh.
The Prince watches me carefully, “if you truly believe that, then I have to ask- Has it really been all that bad? Hirovale’s actions are what led us to eachother...”
“That’s true,” I nod, “and I’m grateful, but those actions were spearheaded without my say…”
I look down at Keane’s hands resting on my legs, “and what’s worse is that he expects me to go along with everything he wants, with everything he tells us to do. He’s never inquired if it’s what I want.”
“What he has asked us to do has been nothing out of the ordinary so far,” Keane points out, “we want to travel to Woodlands of our own accord, not his.”
“And Livyatan?”
He scowls at the question and squeezes my thighs again. “Livyatan will be dealt with. They will need to be. But tell me, Alexis, because I saw it in you. You wanted to storm their borders the moment you heard of their ritual summoning, didn’t you?”
“Yes,” I look up at him sharply, “of course I did, Keane. Who wouldn’t?”
Keane raises his brows in a knowing glance, “many people, Alexis. My father and the King of Aireal among them.”
“Why? How could anyone sit back and let something that horrendous happen in the Old World?”
“Because they are not prepared for the change or the action that will be needed to battle the problem head on,” he answers quietly.
I nod my head at the strong Warrior Prince at my back.
Keane is.
He’s prepared for the change and is ready to fight. As is his brother Desmond. So much so that they’re prepared to take the Woodlands city of Fensby in the name of their Court just to ensure the humans there are treated fairly.
“You want to deal with Livyatan personally, don’t you?” I ask.
“Yes. I do not care for Isham or his facade as Peacemaker, nor do I care for how he looks at you. The Leviathans have been a problem on our border for centuries, and his placating appearance in our capitol now is only a front. His men still ride close to Fumagalli and Varon, though they come just shy of attacking our forests. And while Desmond and I believed that a travel to their lands was never necessary to deal with them, today’s conversation almost makes the trip imminent. ”
“What of Pyre? The McQuoids know of the rumors surrounding the Leviathans. Would they help?”
Keane eyes dart over mine, replying without hesitation. “I believe if asked, they would join in our excursion to Livyatan.”
I nod in agreement, believing the same. The way they hold their court and Kingdom without any distinction as to their races is proof of that. They’re a perfect example of how things should be.
But Clair couldn’t make that travel in any near future....
“Clair wouldn’t join,” I tip my head back on Keane with a smile, “she’s pregnant.”
Keane’s eyes widen at the news before he gives me a beaming grin.
“Good for them. I will write to McQuoid later in congratulations.”
Keane’s hands on my thighs tighten, his brown eyes holding mine with a longing question I know he wants to ask. I shake my head but press my lips to the inside of his neck, truly not prepared to give him an answer right now but promising to save the conversation for another day.
“Do you think Holis and Mana resent me?” I ask quietly.
“No,” Keane shakes his head, one arm gently wrapping around my shoulder to pull me in closer, “but you certainly caught them by surprise. No one in that room blames you for your beliefs, Alexis, and we all understand your need to fight for the mortals of the Old World. I promise to you that Holis and Mana know that… I just think they forgot for a good moment.”
“I still want to bring Alanna and Lord Daniel into the fold,” I rest my cheek on Keane’s chest, “they’ve been with us through the whole travel. If I can find somewhere private, I’m hoping I can talk to them tonight.”
“They are deserving of the truth,” Keane nods, “however, I do think it best to keep the fourth term between us, and perhaps Desmond, as he’s already aware of the oak wood and pen.”
“You want me to keep it, then?” I glance up in confusion.
“Those pieces take only a fraction of small magic to use,” Keane replies, “and it allows me to stay in communication with you when we are apart. This is all I will ask of you when it comes to using magic, though I understand if you wish to decline.”