Chapter 13 #2
I absorb that, etching the words into my memory. “Okay. That’s…incredibly helpful, actually. Thank you.”
“And if anything threatens you, stab it. Even if it’s me. Especially if it’s me.”
I roll my eyes. “We’ve already covered that. Anything else?”
“Yes. Don’t be afraid to use your gyre. You can still go back to the castle two more times. But be smart. Go during the day, while I’m out here hunting.”
I let out a scoff. “I’m not going back to that castle. Ever.”
A growl rolls out of him. “You’re going to sleep in the labyrinth, then?”
“I guess it depends how long this takes,” I shoot back.
“Three days, probably. Or thereabouts.”
The words land heavily, a weight dragging at my middle. Three days. That sounds like forever, considering I barely lasted three hours, before. But I didn’t have a dagger, then, or a plan, or proper clothes, or anything but pure conceit on my side.
Now, I know better. I can do better.
And I’ve escaped that awful wall, at least.
At the thought, I pause to scan my surroundings, searching for the door I spotted before.
Then I frown, because a faint, glowing outline beckons in the distance.
One that’s shaped like a door and set into a tree.
Only this door looks much smaller than I remember.
Not arched, but rectangular, with faint red light leaking from around the frame.
Beggars can’t be choosers, though, so I change course, heading toward it. The Shadow veers with me, glancing over his shoulder when he catches the intent in my face. “Not that door,” he says, his tone strained. “Pick another.”
“Why?”
“Because. That one’s too small.”
I arc an eyebrow. “Because you won’t be able to follow me, you mean?”
He glares, his jaw taking on a mulish cast.
“Do you even know where it leads?”
“No,” he says. “It could be anywhere. There’s no sense to this place. No order. If you open that door twice, it won’t lead to the same place both times.”
I chew on my cheek, trying to wrap my mind around that, but at least this works in my favor.
Every time I duck through a door, my trail will simply disappear.
If I’m lucky, the Shadow will spend his days running in circles, forever a step behind me.
I only have to evade him until I reach the end of the maze.
We reach the tree-door and stop. It seems to open straight into the trunk, the top of its frame barely clearing my knees. Which makes no sense. A door like this shouldn’t exist, shouldn’t lead anywhere.
Only I know that it does.
The longer I study the faint red glow, the drier my throat becomes. But I square my shoulders, filling my lungs with cool summer night.
“Well,” I say. “I guess this is it.”
The Shadow’s face falls. “I don’t want it to be. I don’t know that I can stand it.”
I pause, studying the curve of his eyebrows, the anguished line between them, the bottomless shine of his eyes.
Then the hollow of his throat, bracketed by twin swirls of violet.
The quiver of his abdominal muscles as he stands there, his breathing shallow, and finally, the brand on his shoulder, its glow proclaiming him as mine.
Ishanna’s breath, but even now, some primal force unfolds within me, demanding I draw close. I could erase the distance with no effort at all. Let him wrap those protective arms around me, let him have me, claim me, keep me forever.
Part of me actually wants to.
Instinct tells me to throttle the urge, but instead, I pause to let it settle.
Give it room to breathe. After all, brute force hasn’t gotten me anywhere except hoisted onto Amriel’s desk and thoroughly kissed, which means maybe resistance isn’t my best weapon.
Maybe acknowledging this…whatever it is—cupping my hands around it, feeling its weight before letting it go—makes more sense than denying its existence.
“You are,” I say, my voice roughening, “so incredibly beautiful.”
His eyes flare, their yellow darkening to gold.
“And I’m sorry I’m not someone else,” I continue.
“Maybe, if I was, I would’ve stayed with you.
Maybe I could have. But I’m not built for this world, this…
” I wave a hand at the forest. No one in Aethrolia would believe a place like this even exists.
“…this wildness. I’m a child of Ishanna, of order.
And staying here would change me. You would change me.
” I can see how it would happen. I can feel it happening already.
His lips part. “Is that really so bad?”
A laugh curdles in my throat. “It’s terrifying. Going through this door actually scares me less. So…goodbye. And thank you. And I hope you get everything you want. You deserve to. You’re the best half of him.”
He blinks at me, his eyes too bright. “Princess—”
I splay out a hand to stop the step he’s taken, the clawed hand that reaches for me. He sinks back again at my command, air jetting from his nose, tension vibrating through his body.
I stand there, torn. I almost wish I could touch him again, just one more time.
But I don’t trust myself, don’t trust the mate bond not to lace itself around us, so I turn to the tree-door, kneeling down and pulling it open.
A chute of some type awaits on the other side, spiraling down into darkness.
I have no idea where it leads, only that home lies through this door—my sisters, my goddess, my temple, everything I’ve ever known.
Before I can talk myself out of it, I wriggle through the doorframe, the rough bark scraping at my ribs.
I pull myself in and go sliding down into the dark, the Shadow’s stricken howls echoing behind me.