Chapter 20
CHAPTER TWENTY
TAMSYN
I settle on my back, lever up on my elbows and watch with avid interest as he quickly strips off his T-shirt and shorts. I know it’s only been a few days since we last had sex, but I’m as hungry for the sight of him as I am for the feel of him. He’s got that perfect inverted triangle going, with those broad shoulders tapering to lean abs and notched hips without a trace of fat anywhere on him. Rippling arms. Toned thighs and calves. A dusting of hair across his pecs that trails off to nearly nothing before flaring to a thick patch around that stellar dick. It’s long and hard. Thick. Jutting and more than ready to go. Just the way I need him.
“Watch how you look at me,” he says, his expression dark and strained as he joins me on the bed and looms over me. “You’ve already got me on a hair-trigger here.”
I don’t care. I can’t help but lick my lips because I don’t know which part of him I want to devour first. Those full lips? What about if I bit his tight ass right this very second? How would he react? “Am I not supposed to notice how hard you are for me? It’s kind of hard to miss, wouldn’t you say?”
He smirks. “You do have that effect on me.”
“Good.”
“And I seem to recall some talk about you—what was it?— living for this moment.”
I frown thoughtfully. “Oh, was that me?”
“That was you.”
“You did promise to fuck me until I sobbed. Or did you forget?”
“I did not forget.” He yanks my shorts and panties down my legs and off, then tosses them aside. “You’ll see.”
The illicit promise in that velvety tone nearly makes me swoon, as does my new proximity to his familiar scent. But I make a swift executive decision when he starts to straddle me, rolling him onto his back and straddling him instead. I want to be in charge tonight. And I know we just got through saying we don’t want Ravenna here in the bed with us, but this is for her in absentia as much as it is for him. I have something to prove tonight, and I suppose I’m proving it to all three of us. But she does not get to come back from whatever hole she crawled out of and touch Lucien. She does not get to leave her mark on his body. I won’t stand for it. He’s mine . He just told me so. So it’s time I started acting like it. I’m tired of lacking confidence about it. I’m tired of being afraid of Ravenna in both ghostly and human form. I’m tired of wondering when she might turn up or what she might do when she does.
Fuck her. Fuck her.
“No, you’ll see.”
He stares up at me, eyes heavy lidded and gleaming. I have his rapt attention. I plan to keep it. “Is that right?”
I laugh because I can’t wait to get started. “You’re about to find out.”
I’m always with you, Tamsyn . The voice filters through my thoughts, a snippet of something unwelcome but familiar. Is it Ravenna? I don’t know, and now is not the time to find out.
She has no business here.
With that, I lower my head and go to work on his mouth, licking deep and nipping his lower lip as I withdraw. His neck is next. I nuzzle the strong column on both sides, relishing the hiss of his breath and the new tension in his straining body. I reach for his arms on my leisurely way south, massaging all those strong cords and tendons before twining our fingers together. We can’t hold each other hard enough, squeezing each other’s hands as though we want to sear our fingerprints into each other’s flesh.
These are my arms. My hands.
I let him go and massage my way down his rippling torso, taking care to lick and then suck each nipple as I go. His flesh leaps everywhere I touch, which makes me wallow in my femininity and laugh triumphantly.
He takes my head in a hard grip as I dip my tongue in his bellybutton and give it a nuzzle. “Are you proud of yourself? Driving me insane like this?”
“Very,” I say with another sultry laugh. His voice sounds ruined now. I love that. Then I shift my grip to his hips and shoot him a pointed look up the length of his body as I ease lower. “And if you like that , watch this .”
His fingers flex against my scalp. I’m not sure whether he’s pulling me closer or holding me off. I doubt he knows either. “ Tamsyn… ”
“Shh,” I say, lowering my head.
I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I’ve never gone down on him before. I’m relatively new to the sex game, and God knows he’s kept me busy with plenty of other activities between the sheets. But Ravenna (fuck her) is the kind of woman who drops men to their knees with a single glance, so I know she knows how to give stellar head. And anything she can do with Lucien, I plan to do better. Not that I know what I’m doing. Yet. But all that changes now.
So I give him an experimental lick all the way up his shaft. He stiffens, his hips jackknifing.
Taking that as a good sign, I give the ruddy and perfect plum of his head a voluptuous kiss. I feel his lungs heave as his entire body contracts. Then I fist him at the base and plunge all the way in, taking him as deep into my mouth as I possibly can. It’s such an odd sensation, the saltiness of his pre-cum on my tongue. He’s so smooth. So rigid. So big . My aching jaws are unprepared. They have no idea how to handle all this .
But I don’t let that stop me.
Everything I know about blowjobs I learned from my trusty gang from Girls . Which isn’t much, I discover now that I’m down in the trenches. I’ve got no real idea what I’m supposed to be doing, so I try a little of everything. I swirl my tongue. I suck, doing my best to swallow him. I pull him out and take him in again, doing it over and over until my head bobs the way I’ve seen during my fleeting glimpses of my roommates’ porn. It must be working, because he gets steadily more restless, his hips thrusting and his thighs flexing on either side of my head.
“Fuck, Tamsyn.” He sounds strangled now. “ Shit. ”
Music to my ears. I keep it up until my tongue and throat burn and my jaws curse me. Anything to drive him wild and to drive her out of his mind. Forever. I keep it up until he’s finally forced to pull my hair to get my attention and let him slide free.
He turns his head to stare down at me, panting and sweaty now. “Enough.”
“Not yet,” I say, because I’m not stopping. Not until he knows, and everyone is perfectly clear about where we stand. So I keep going down the rest of his body, massaging and kissing his thighs. His calves. His feet. I even squeeze his toes. All of them. And then, when I’ve covered every inch I can reach of his body—including a nip on the meaty side of his ass and scratches on his sides on the way back up—I straddle him, taking all the time in the world about rubbing my drenched pussy against all that hard goodness.
“Lucien.” I toss my hair out of my face and stare at him long and hard to make sure he’s listening. I revel in his breathlessness. His sweat. His high color. His glazed eyes. I did that to him. “No one else is here with us. Ever. No one else touches you. Ever again.”
There’s a new gleam of respect in his expression. “If you insist.”
Victorious laugh from me as I reach between us and angle my hips?—
“Not so fast.” The next thing I know, he rolls me the way I rolled him a few minutes ago and I’m flat on my back beneath him. And there’s nothing glazed or compliant about him now. He’s all dark intent and leashed power. “You didn’t think you were going to have the last word, did you?”
Breathless excitement causes my beaded nipples to rub against his unyielding chest, but it’s already too late. He clamps his hands on my hips and—oh, God —trails his lips all the way down my torso before zeroing in on my clit.
As usual, this elicits a string of jumbled cries from me as I writhe against him and try to get closer while also trying to get away. He rumbles with satisfaction, the wet sounds of his lapping driving me wilder.
“ Stop , Lucien,” I say, sobbing now, but I’m the world’s biggest hypocrite because I can’t grip his head tight enough or spread my legs wide enough. “I want you inside me when I come.”
He raises his head, eyes blazing and lips slick with my juices. “You’ll come when I say you come.”
And he dips his head again, one perfectly placed nuzzle that concentrates all the pleasure in my body into a staggering spasm and a loud calling of his name.
This time he laughs with triumph. He rises over me and reaches between us as I slowly regain the use of my limbs and aid him by wrapping my legs around his waist. He’s in charge, and the only reason I thought I had a moment of control was because he let me.
“Just so we’re clear,” he says, taking his hard length and running it back and forth in my slickness, torturing me again. “No one else touches you . Ever. I’m going to be the only man in your life. Got it? This pussy is mine. You’re mine. You belong to me . Your thoughts. Your heart. Mine . That never changes. And I’m a greedy fucking SOB. I’m going to take everything you’ve got. So you need to be good with that.”
He stares down at me, focused and absolutely unyielding. I wouldn’t have it any other way.
“If you insist.”
The briefest flash of a smile between us.
Then he enters me with one hard surge that makes us both spout nonsense words. The next thing I know, he’s all the way inside me with my hands pinned on either side of my head and his flexing hips fucking me into joyous oblivion. I want to watch him so I can see the exact moment he loses himself in me. I don’t want to miss his gasps, the way the muscles in his shoulders bunch and flex or the way sweat drips from his chest onto my soft flesh. I want to see his grimaces of sweet pain as I scratch his back. But there’s no way to stop my eyes from rolling closed as my spine arches. No way to slow down the dizzying concentration of pleasure between my thighs. No way to outrun the ecstasy as it tackles me into submission and washes over me again and again and again.
He’s right there with me, his hoarse shout the best possible music to my ears. “Tamsyn. Fuck. Tamsyn .”
He stiffens and shudders, his hard body pressing me deep into the mattress for an endless second, then collapses on top of me with his head buried against my neck. I wrap my arms and legs tighter around him, euphoric as I relish his immovable weight and the feeling of his rib cage heaving against mine as he struggles to catch his breath.
I don’t know why I ever thought that we didn’t belong together, exactly like this. In what universe did that seem like a good idea? There’s only this. Only us. I’m glad we both know it.
He raises his head after a while, face flushed and sweaty, eyes glowing. “That was a nice distraction.”
“ Nice ?”
“But don’t think I didn’t notice that you left me hanging,” he says, staring me in the face.
“About…?” I say, but I already know, and my heart thunders anew.
He scowls and gives me a little thrust that sparks a new shower of sensation all through my lower regions. “Don’t fuck with me. Tell me I’m not in this alone.”
As always, any hint of his vulnerability melts me into vanilla goo topped with rainbow sparkles. All my newfound happiness rises higher, making me sound throaty. “You’re not in this alone. You know you’re not.”
“And…?”
It’s a big moment, but the words flow out of me, a fluttering butterfly on the breeze. There’s no stopping them. I’m surprised I held on to them for this long. “I love you too, Lucien.”
Absolute silence except for the sound of his hitching breath.
“I thought you might,” he says as he dips his head so I can kiss his smiling lips.