Chapter 16 #2
When I snuck out through my window, this is what I’d hoped for: A boy I never imagined would ever want to kiss me in the dim glow of the moonlight.
But all of those dreams turn as sour as the taste on Timothy’s tongue.
All at once Mami’s voice comes swirling back.
Warning me that I should’ve never left home.
Warning me that they’ll never see me as equal.
Warning me that they’ll only ever see me as something they can hurt.
That sadness morphs into something darker the tighter he holds me.
An emotion as boiling hot as the water from the tub, threatening to spill over and burn anyone in its path.
New strength flows through me, but I’m too afraid of what it might mean to act on it.
How easy it would be to grab one of the glass shards once he lets me go and push it straight into his heart.
To make him pay for all the ways he hurt me.
“What the fuck, man?!” Kai’s voice cuts in just in time, before those dangerous thoughts can take over.
In almost slow motion, I find the strength to push Timothy away but not without giving up some of my balance.
I shove him off me with all the fight I have left, but he’s sturdy enough to send me wobbling back.
Pain slices through me the exact moment the glass pierces my foot—red-hot and blinding as I struggle to find a way to stay balanced and still keep Timothy far away.
I don’t even have time to register Kai’s presence—that he saw what happened between us. All I hear is an “oof” as Timothy smacks against the deck railing and suddenly Kai is beside me, readying to kneel on the ground but stalling when he sees the glass.
“Hey, it’s just me,” he whispers, and it’s only then that I hear the sobs. Primal and gut-wrenching and, somehow, coming from me. Tears roll down my cheeks, my fingers shaking as I go to reach out for him for balance but find myself pulling away instead.
Because I’m afraid. Of him. Of touch.
And maybe deep down somewhere, of myself.
In just a few seconds Timothy managed to take away my trust. A single unwanted kiss has cut straight through me, draining me of all my hope and faith that good things would eventually find me. For a fleeting moment, I consider that Mami may have been right. I should never trust anyone.
Even Kai.
“We were just—”
“Get the fuck away from her,” Kai shouts at Timothy before he can rattle off some excuse for why he did what he did to me.
Before Timothy can try to argue again, Kai’s arm slips beneath the backs of my knees, the other holding me at the waist as he hoists me into the air.
“I’ve got you,” he promises, again and again, as he carries me back into the cabin. I’m too weak to protest his touch, but once I’m hoisted into the air I don’t mind much at all. So long as he gets me far away from here—from him.
I’m able to think more clearly once we’re safely back inside the cabin, the adrenaline and fear beginning to simmer back down.
The comfort I always took in Kai’s voice returns, despite the fear Timothy awakened in me.
“I’ve got you,” Kai repeats, like a mantra or a prayer. Soft and kind and full of promise.
Tears still blur my vision even after he sets me down.
He gives me space to let it all out, sitting across from me until the sobs simmer down to whimpers.
He gets me a glass of water and a tissue but doesn’t say anything.
Through the dark I struggle to make out the details of where we are.
A bathroom, I slowly figure out. Me on the edge of the counter and him propped on the edge of the closed toilet seat lid.
While I down my water—hiccupping between sips—he takes my phone and sets it on the back of the toilet seat, the flashlight bathing us in light.
“Can I look at your foot?” he asks so tenderly it breaks my heart. The fear comes back full force like a ten-ton weight when he reaches for my foot. As much as I wanted to believe I was fine, the mere thought of touch makes me want to run away.
I don’t want Timothy to have that kind of power over me, though, so I nod my consent to Kai.
He’s incredibly careful as I extend my leg out toward him, stalling when I wince at even at the lightest brush of his skin against mine.
He takes his time, waiting until the tension eases from my shoulders before he approaches again.
Blood drips onto the plush white bathmat, but Kai doesn’t seem to care as he gingerly cups my calf and tilts my foot toward him.
I wince again when he gently pushes it back to get a better look at the slice in my heel, hissing and tugging slightly out of his grip.
“Sorry, sorry, sorry,” he says quickly, but not panicked.
He doesn’t reach out for me again right away, instead letting me set the terms. Once again, he waits for my rushed breathing to slow before he extends his hands back out toward me, and I set my leg back into his hold.
“It’s deeper than I thought,” he murmurs, brow furrowing as he examines the wound more closely.
“And looks like there’s still a piece left in here. ”
The thought makes me dizzy, even though I shouldn’t be surprised. The way pain shoots through me at even the slightest movements should’ve made that obvious.
“I’m gonna grab some stuff to get this cleaned up. Okay?”
He waits until I give him another nod before standing up, carefully setting my foot back down to dangle over the edge of the counter.
He moves quickly, taking my phone and the light that came with it, but stalls in the doorway.
Just like Timothy did. My traitorous heart pounds when he turns around, anxious about what his next move could be. But he just frowns.
“You’re gonna be okay,” he whispers, eyes focused on mine. And even when he walks away, leaving me in the dark, I know he means it.
I brace myself for Timothy to come back—to storm through the open doorway and finish what he started.
But no footsteps approach. I can hear the comforting sound of Kai pulling the sliding door shut, locking it behind him followed by the rustle of him opening drawers and cabinets in the kitchen like Kiki had earlier.
He’s back faster than I anticipated, rushing into the room so quickly he almost loses his balance on the blood-slick tile.
He sets the lit up phone on the edge of the counter beside me, and I suddenly remember that he’d given Kiki’s phone to Timothy to use for light.
A much needed resource wasted on a creep who used it just to corner me.
“I thought I’d finally figured out how the hell the wiring for the cabin worked,” Kai begins explaining without any prompting, talking a mile a minute as he lays out the supplies he grabbed from the kitchen.
“The whole thing was a mess of wires that all looked the same, and I didn’t want to leave and forget which one was which, so I had Timothy run inside to grab the tweezers, but then I heard you scream and I… ”
He exhales sharply, cutting himself off mid-explanation. A piece of me softens. He didn’t ignore me. He heard me. He came after me. Just a moment too late.
“I should’ve just dropped everything and ran over as soon as I heard you. I’m so, so sorry I didn’t.”
Even in the dim light from my phone flashlight I can see tears glimmering in his eyes, hear guilt dripping from every syllable he speaks.
He doesn’t touch me, doesn’t move in any closer.
Just kneels down in front of me and looks up with eyes that beg for the forgiveness he can’t ask for out loud.
It breaks my heart, looking at how hurt he is.
But it hurts me just as much, too—how badly I wish he could’ve arrived a few seconds earlier.
I’m not sure what to say—what could possibly sum up all the conflicting feelings swirling in my head and my heart?
How I’m not sure who I can trust here after that voicemail from Mikey and what Timothy’s done.
How it feels impossible to not believe that Kai is exactly who I want him to be when he looks at me with those kind brown eyes and touches me with the kind of tenderness I’ve always wished for.
So, I don’t say anything. Instead, I let my body speak for me. I reach down to where his hand is resting beside mine on the counter, squeezing just enough to say what my body can’t: that I’m okay. And that I hope we’ll be okay too.
The simple touch is enough for Kai. He gives me a thin smile, eyes still watery as he wipes them before getting back to the much more urgent (and unpleasant) task at hand.
“This’ll probably sting a bit,” he warns as he settles himself back down on the ground, carefully lifting my leg up to get a better look at my heel. “Bite down on a towel, scream, hold onto my hand—whatever you need,” he reassures, and I nod around a gulp.
Kai’s hands move in a blur, too quickly for me to make out what he’s doing in the dimly lit room.
I can hear the snap of a package pulling open, and something coming unrolled, but before I can put together what it all means pain jolts through me.
White hot enough to make me arch away from the wall I was leaning against and let out a choked, pained whimper.
“I’m sorry, almost done,” Kai promises, sounding just as panicked as I am. I can feel his fingers trembling against my leg as he struggles to move efficiently and painlessly. The edge of what must be tweezers dig into my skin as they root through the gash for the stray piece of glass.