Chapter 13 Rae #2
How did he know I was hesitant to do so? I’m not even sure why I hesitate. I’m finding it easier now with Remi, but Remi is like a cat. Keres is… different. Or maybe just larger. And unlike anything I’ve ever ridden.
A hint of… amusement tugs at my mind, and somehow I know it’s coming from this drak.
Keres.
“Tell him…” Jai takes another step toward me and stumbles. Curses. Then he stands still, breathing hard for long moments as I try to wrestle the worry back and not reach for him.
“Are you okay?” I ask, proud of the steadiness of my voice.
“I’m fine.” Said through gritted teeth.
Not that I should worry about him. Not when he looked at me like that, with that dread and disgust.
Besides, he’s Athdara, the dragon speaker. Fairly indestructible.
Here I choose to ignore how he’d looked when I had dragged him out of the squid’s tentacles, how he’d floated on the surface of the arena, pale and still.
“It won’t be the first time he died, if it’s any consolation.”
I also refuse to think about all the riddles Phaethon has gifted me with. About all they imply. All that can be read between the lines, between the words.
I look up at my drak. One of his tucked-in wings jerks a little. He’s watching me still, one blue eye fixed on me.
Let’s do this.
Deep breaths.
As Jai instructed, I climb onto the drak’s folded leg, fully convinced he’ll twist his neck, turn his head, and snap me in half for daring. But nothing happens, and after another breath, I clamber up to the shoulder.
I pause, panting a little, mostly from fear rather than exertion.
“Rae?” Jai is still there.
“I said I’m okay,” I call out. “Get in the saddle. We don’t have much time.”
I itch to turn and look, make sure he doesn’t fall, that he makes it to the other drak. But of course he’s fine. He said so. We’re almost done with this trial, this game—and I’m not only talking about the Death Games.
I have to talk to him, talk to the king, talk to myself and clarify everything because… because this isn’t what I came here to find, not what I signed up for.
Are you seriously regretting finding Mars again?
Of course not.
But then why does my heart feel like it’s breaking whenever I think of Jai?
Gritting my teeth against this unwelcome discovery, I climb onto the drak’s shoulder and from there to his back.
The creature shifts a little underneath me, scales rattling softly.
His neck twists and he does turn his head, bringing those saber teeth way too close for comfort—but he only keeps an eye on me as I hang there precariously, fumbling for the key stuck in my belt.
That would be just my luck, that I drop the key and the drak decides to take a bite out of me after all.
Jai wouldn’t let that happen.
Another thought to chew on as I finally climb higher on the drak’s neck and swing myself into the black saddle.
Once seated, I search for the place to insert the key.
Did Jai know to call for a trained, conscripted drak?
Does he know the draks personally? Could he have called just as easily a wild drak with no saddle or harness?
“He called for a dragon to ride,” Keres breathes in my mind. “I left the army long ago, but the saddle is welded to my back.”
That’s terrible. I frown. Dammit, where do I put this damn key…?
There. A missing piece in a puzzle, two entry holes into which I shove the ends of the key, and it clicks.
The drak shifts again underneath me, letting out a low rumble, a quake of muscles rippling under my thighs, under the plain, military saddle.
I grip the reins so hard they dig into my flesh, my knuckles white.
Another quake and I hiss, bowing over the drak’s neck as it slowly heaves itself to its… feet? Paws? Talons?
Then the world heaves, shifts, and the ground is suddenly too far away.
I yelp and tighten my knees against the scaly hide like Jai told me as the drak stands on all fours, barely feeling the scales scraping patches off my bare skin.
The drak shakes his head. The harness rattles. I sway on top of him and my stomach pitches.
Okay. Okay. I’m still in the saddle, still alive—well… the latter is debatable but all in all, I can’t complain.
I glance toward Jai to say something inane and stupid like, “I made it! Did you see me do it? Am I not a champion?”
The mortification. I’m not a little girl and he’s not my family.
But he’s not on his drak, as I’d expected, already seated and ready. No, I find him with a hand on the yellow drak’s side, dark head bowed. I’m not sure what he’s doing, but the wind brings me snatches of phrases and words. He’s muttering something.
A prayer?
Or a curse.
“Tenebra,” he’s whispering. “Pasianax. Neb-Sekert. Morychos Ense.”
No idea what those words mean, but I’m pretty sure that’s Phaethon speaking. Did he take over again?
Then, “No. Fuck, no. Remember Eos, remember what she’d say. Stop.”
The last word reverberates inside my mind like a pebble falling down a deep well.
I shake my head to clear it.
The constant fight between them shouldn’t hit me in the feels like that. I shouldn’t find it so distressing. So excruciating.
Jai’s exhaustion and blood loss could mean Phaethon finds it easier to take over, and he may do so again. Controlling him has to take a lot out of Jai and he still needs to get onto his drak.
Shit. I need to get off this drak and go to him, though how I’d get back up is another story, and as for what I’d do when I reach Jai, I have no clue. Tell Phaethon to shove it? Give Jai a leg up? Make sure, I don’t know… that they don’t kill each other?
A snort escapes me, surprising me. This isn’t funny.
But before I can move a muscle, Jai shakes his head and starts climbing. He swings himself into the saddle with a speed I could never hope to match. He grabs the reins and his gaze finds me.
Is it Jai or Phaethon behind those dark mirrors?
“Still want us to search for the human survivors?” he asks.
Blood is steadily dripping from his wounded leg, sliding down the yellow drak’s side, and I make a decision.
“No. We’re going to the palace.”
“As you say,” he grunts, the words echoing both in my ears and in my mind. His Goldfinch drak rises on all four legs and shakes himself.
I have yet to meet a female drak or darakin, the thought sort of random and panicky, because it’s time. Time for me to fly on a drak.
Alone.
Panic is turning my stomach, souring my mouth. My arms are trembling. My whole body is shaking.
You’d think that after falling to the bowels of the underworld and returning I’d know no fear, but it seems that while I occupy this human body, I get all the human weaknesses I thought I’d left behind.
All the emotions, the ups and downs, the thrills, the joyful rides and the panicky depths of despair.
And let’s not forget lust.
When I surfaced and climbed onto that sinking boat in the swamps with my mission in mind, I couldn’t wait to return to the cold depths and the oblivion they offer—but those thoughts feel distant now. Those goals feel misaligned. I don’t know what I need anymore.
The yellow drak with Jai on its back is already unfolding those membranous wings that are tipped with crimson and taking a few thundering steps forward.
Toward the edge of the cliff, the end of the platform.
I hold my breath as Jai turns his head and gazes at me a moment before his drak launches off the edge and into the air.
Holy shit!
No time to react or get my breathing under control before my drak follows in the steps of the dragon summoner, each step jolting me. I hang onto the reins for dear life as my drak opens those pale leathery wings and takes a running leap off the platform.
Vertigo hits me as we plummet down, toward the frothing sea—then arch and fly upward.
Up into the sky.