Chapter 42
February 2008
Charlotte
“OMG, I love it, Charlie!” Sariah gushes over my new lob. The weight that came off when the stylist took those scissors to my long, luscious hair and begged me to reconsider when the almost two-digit inches fell was both metaphorically and physically a load off.
I feel like a whole new person. My hair has always been long. I never thought I could pull off a shorter cut. But here I am, killing it.
I dramatically flip each side of my hair back and forth, “Why thank you, it is pretty rad, huh?”
As Sariah drives us back to my place, I lose myself in the blurring of the trees as we pass them when her voice breaks the comfortable silence. “So. Did you hear back from the university?”
I sigh deeply. Yeah, I heard alright. I nod, “Yeah. I was called in for another meeting yesterday. This time with the Dean and a police officer. The urine was clean.”
“Of course it was.” I love how she is so steadfast in her belief in me that she has zero doubt as to whether or not I have been using again.
“The hair, however, showed minor traces of AstraClara. She fucking did it. The cunt drugged me. She smiled in my goddamn face while planning my downfall. She had apparently also been in Gentry’s ear since my first week of school. Telling him I’ve cheated on tests. That I seduced another professor. Even said I was planning on seducing him. So when I walked into his classroom and accidentally gave everyone a titty show, he thought that was purposeful on my part.”
“What a horrible girl. I hope the police find her. Is there still no word?”
“Nope,” I respond, popping the P.
I wave goodbye to Sariah and walk into my building when my phone rings. Without looking at the caller ID, I pick it up.
“So?” Savvy impatiently asks.
“Let me get into my room, and I’ll tell you everything.”
We’ve missed each other for the last few days, but I texted her a brief Cliff Notes version about everything that happened with Rebecca and the drug testing.
When I get back to my room, I spill it all. Including my new ‘do.
“She fucking Jennifer Jason Leigh’d you? That fucking cunt. I will come there right now, Charls. I will stomp the hoe right out, pregnant or not.” Savvy snarls. And I have no doubt she would. God love my best friend, I know she would do anything for me. I can’t help but laugh at her Single White Female reference. “Also, I bet it’s super cute, and I want pics ASAP.”
“Yeah. So that’s my life.” I laugh. Because what else can I do? This shit is bananas. Like, fully b-a-n-a-n-a-s.
We catch up for a while before her busy social life pulls her away as usual. This guy in her music class has gotten under her skin. People never get under Savvy’s skin. I’m curious if there’s more to it than the hatred she claims.
My next call is to my sponsor, Genny. I need to inform her that my clean date is no longer accurate. My fault or not, I can’t in good conscience tell myself and a room full of people that I’ve been clean for over a year when that’s no longer true. Genny assured me all will be well, and we will discuss it more at the meeting tonight.
Sariah promised I could be the one to tell Reggie. She swears no one will look at me differently or judge what’s occurred, but the guilt I feel over the situation is immense and, if I’m not careful, could be debilitating.
As I stand at the podium and gaze out among the sea of my fellow addicts, a cold sweat works its way down my spine, and my hands begin to tremble. There’s no getting around it. I need to rip the bandaid off and confess the sins that don’t actually belong to me, but I’m being punished for them anyway.
I don’t know what I expected. The crowd to turn into an angry mob complete with pitchforks, Bibles, and flaming sticks of condemnation? Shouts of judgment and anger? Being kicked out of the group and banished forever?
None of those things happened. As a matter of fact, at the end of my very long-winded share, Genny and Reggie pulled me aside, and we had a good, long talk. I’m in charge of my clean date. Whether or not drugs were forced in my body –ah-fucking-gain–, I remained clean. My soul is clean. My intentions are clean.
I decide whether or not to reset my date—no one else. Though the sentiment does make me feel better, and I see where they are coming from, I still struggle with deciding how I feel about it.
“I know you usually walk home, Charlie, but would you mind riding with us so I can run some lines with you? I am so nervous about my audition tomorrow.” Reggie asks with a sweet, pleading face only he could get away with. Complete with bottom lip stuck out for childish effect.
I agree, and we hop into Sariah’s waiting minivan. Reggie’s actually getting really good. He handed me the only copy of the manuscript to follow along, and he hasn’t missed a single beat. He has absolutely nothing to worry about, though there’s no telling him that. I don’t know if it’s all actors or just him who needs to be one hundred percent perfection. There is no room for error in the world of Reggie.
Walking down the sidewalk on campus heading to Burlington Hall, we rehearse the scene he’s most uncertain about.
He plays a working man in the 1950s who has been courting a young girl, but she doesn’t know he’s actually very rich and doesn’t need to work at all. She has been working herself to the bone ever since she could remember, just trying to scrimp and save every penny she can to take care of her ailing father and much younger brother.
He wanted a wife who didn’t want him just for the money. He pretended to be destitute to make sure his bride was pure of heart. Tonight, if her response is favorable, he will tell her the truth and ask for her hand in marriage.
Reggie delicately wraps his arm around my lower back as we walk. Getting into character, he leans down and says, “Stella, I have something to tell you.”
I try really hard to remember my lines, but for the life of me, I have no idea what I’m supposed to say. So, I improvise.
“Tell me what’s up, big boy?” I say dramatically breathy.
Reggie smiles and shakes his head at me but doesn’t break character. He continues with his next line. “I know I told you I was a bus driver, but that’s actually not true.”
I gasp loudly, “Oh shiz! Why you lie, bro?”
“You see, I’m actually from a very wealthy family, and I have been unlucky in the ways of true love. So, I came up with this test of sorts. To make sure you loved me for me and not the riches I can provide you.”
I lean close and whisper conspiratorially, “But you spendin’ them dollars, right?”
“I want to give you the moon, my darling. But only if you’ll have me, as I am.” He turns us, and I beam a wide smile up at him. Feeling so proud of how awesomely he is nailing this scene. He is going to blow this audition out of the water.
“Hells yeah boo, rain them benji’s down on me!” There’s supposed to be a big romantic kiss, but yeah, no, so we hold hands as I lean up on my tip toes and place a nice chaste kiss on his cheek.
“You are going to crush this, Reg. I mean it. You’ve worked so hard, and you know these lines backward and forward. Don’t fuss about it. Take Sariah home, maybe bang out your nerves a bit, and get a great night’s sleep.”
“I can’t thank you enough for going through this with me. It truly means so much. You’re a great friend. I feel ready. I’m going to kick names and take ass, or whatever it is you always say.” He laughs as we pull apart.
“Call me first thing when you hear! I want to be the one to take you and Sariah out for a celebratory dinner. And I won’t take none of the bullshit you pulled last time we went out and secretly snuck your card to the waitress,” I poke him in the chest so he knows I mean friendly business, “I mean it, mister. ”
“Yeah, yeah. You got it. Have a good night, and we’ll talk soon.” He says as he begins walking back toward the lot where Sariah parked.
As I push the large front door of my dorm building open, a loud squealing of tires startles me. My head whips towards the lot on the other side of where we walked in. A small car is speeding away out of the parking lot.
With my heart pounding in my ears now from the fright, fear instantly turns to annoyance. “Slow the fuck down, you psycho. You could kill someone.” I grumble to myself and make my way into the building.
My phone pings with a text just as I begin to drift off.
Savs : Call me first thing in the morning. We have something urgent to discuss.