14. Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fourteen
Iwoke up to the sound of my phone ringing.
The last thing I remembered was a dream about Mason carrying me through the hotel and conference.
It had been a long time since I had a dream like this.
It had been a long time since I remember dreaming about Mason at all, but since I’d arrived, I’d had them each night.
Last night, I had fallen asleep thinking of how safe I had always felt when he lifted me out of my chair and carried me where I needed to go.
No other person had ever been strong enough to do that and make me feel secure when they did it.
It tainted my other relationships after we broke up.
I seemed to equate the physical strength to carry me as a sign of other strength.
Even Mason hadn’t been able to live up to that expectation.
I had treated his other weaknesses as moral failings.
I was still being that unkind, and I was sure the dream of him carrying me was my brain trying to tell me something.
I hadn’t figured it out before the phone started ringing.
“Have you looked outside yet?” Lizbeth asked, her voice rapid with anxiety.
I looked toward the windows and realized I had closed them the night before so I could sleep past sunrise. There had been a forecast for an overnight dusting of snow, but this was much more than had been expected.
“The dusting turned into a blizzard last night,” she said before I could answer. “The roads aren’t even clear yet. It started late last night, dumped a few feet of snow quickly, and it’s over.”
“Alright,” I said. “I’m sure they’ll prioritize clearing the main roads first and we can delay the start of the day. Let Mason know it will be fine.”
Lizbeth paused before responding.
“He’s already on top of it,” she said. “Actually, I think he was working something out last night as a backup plan. Campus isn’t going to be able to clear the road for the conference center until after lunch. They’re prioritizing the places the students need to get to.”
Clearing snow took hours of work by a team of people. An unexpected storm would delay that work because people had to get out of their homes and to campus first. That meant their roads and driveways needed to be cleared.
“Didn’t they know about this?” I asked.
Lizbeth blew out a deep breath. “It wasn’t going to hit this far north. We were prepared for a dusting, not two or more feet.”
“What do you need from me?” I asked, confused about what I could do to help if Mason was already working on whatever needed to be done.
“Mason reminded me that you may not be able to easily get around. Do you need anything?” she asked.
I rolled my eyes even though she couldn’t see me. “I live on Cape Cod, Lizbeth,” I reminded her. “Not only do I have snow tires on my van and chair, but I have other tools to add to my chair that will make it easier to get around on snow and ice.”
I heard Lizbeth let out a sigh, and I was sure she had lowered her shoulders, relieved that I knew how to handle my shit. I had spent plenty of winters in Lacock during grad school, so I knew what could suddenly happen and ruin plans in February.
“I don’t want you to leave the hotel until we know the roads are safe and we have an alternative spot,” she said, and I could hear a lighter tone in her voice.
“I’m going to order breakfast and I’ll wait to hear from you,” I said. “This isn’t a busy conference day and I’m sure most people went home last night.”
“Right,” Lizbeth said, perking up. “This is the unconference day! It will be fine.”
I focused on what had been planned for the day as I took my time getting ready.
I loved the unconference format for the last day of events.
The idea was to not plan any sessions, but to let those who came decide what topics they wanted to talk about with each other.
Sheets of paper with various topics on them would be put out so people could put their names on it to show interest. The organizers would assign spaces to as many as they could and announce what and where before the day got started.
This would happen a few times, often with participants adding their own topics to the mix.
It was a great chance to move forward on projects or continue discussions from the last few days.
I had been excited to see what topics were popular.
I considered this to be more data about what topics editors were engaged with and may fit in a strategic plan.
If any day of the conference had to be delayed because of snow, this was the best day.
There were so few plans for the day that starting later in the morning or even after lunch wouldn’t prevent people from doing their presentations.
The most difficult part was probably communicating the delay, but the participants of this conference were probably online early and chatting with each other to spread the news.
When I opened my laptop and went to the conference pages, I saw plenty of direct messages left for me about the delay.
Others offered help to get around if I needed it.
I appreciated their concern, but I was hoping to see one from Mason and I wasn’t disappointed.
He had been the first person to leave a message for me asking if I had the ski blades for my wheels.
I smiled, since he had bought them for me to put on my front wheels so I could be safer in the snow.
I had multiple pairs now and there were always a pair in my van, ready for a day just like this.
“It’s Carrie Woodhouse,” a voice said on the other end of the phone while I sipped my coffee about an hour after Lizbeth’s call. “Mason asked me to see if you’d be interested in a breakfast delivery.”
“Thank you, but room service sent up everything I needed,” I said, touched that Mason had thought of my needs specifically. This was why I had fallen in love with him. “This is a great hotel.”
Carrie chuckled. “Then you probably got the pastries I would have brought you anyway. Our baker Humberto supplies them.”
“I’m glad the roads were clear enough for you to open the cafe this morning,” I said.
Carrie was silent on the other end of the line for a moment. “We cleared the sidewalk ourselves to make sure people can get around. Only campus takes forever. Mason was smart to talk to me last night to create a backup plan.”
“He knew the storm would be bad?” I asked.
She chuckled. “No. He likes to have backup plans. He knows what campus is like and didn’t want to have anything throw off his plan.”
“I don’t think a shop is good for a conference,” I said, not feel comfortable being in a store while people want to shop or eat in the cafe themselves.
“No, the shop area isn’t great, but we have a whole workshop set up in the basement with an elevator.
We even have a kitchen down there for Zach’s classes.
Not that you’ll need it but it’s the perfect space!
” Carrie said, and I imagined her jumping up and running around her spaces to get ready for us.
“I don’t think there’s going to much of a delay.
You should come over when you’re ready.”
Carrie was right, Mason always had a back-up plan.
When he had proposed, we were on Cape Cod in early January to work on our dissertations before the semester began.
He had picked a cabin that was easy for me to get around and planned his proposal for three different situations.
He was able to get reservations at a restaurant, but he was worried that it wouldn’t be accessible so he had a backup restaurant in mind.
Even then he prepared for the possibility of a snowstorm preventing us from leaving.
His original plan went off without a hitch, but that night in bed we drank the champagne he had bought for his snowstorm plan.
How had he not planned that well for his own future?
“My plan was that I would make a fire and pile all the blankets on the floor so we could cuddle and watch the snow fall,” he explained.
“Is that why you brought so many blankets?” I asked him, looking at the massive pile on the couch.
These cabins were popular beach spots in the summer.
The property had twelve of them and a pool for guests to use.
It was steps away from the beach as well.
It was a great space in the summer, but you didn’t spend lots of time inside.
The owner had been smart, and half of the cabins could be used in the winter.
They were large single rooms with a kitchenette and a fireplace.
The bathroom was large since this specific cabin had been designed for accessibility.
I imagined us revisiting this spot every winter if we didn’t move here after graduation.
Those dreams were dashed and remembering it now made me sad.
Mason always having a contingency plan was his effort to feel secure.
I should have known at the time that his need for security would be how he made all his decisions.
I had learned that there was no security in the world.
I had to fight for everything since my accident.
I was never going to look for security and have back up plans because sometimes none of your plans mattered.
The only time I had forgotten this was when I was with Mason and planning our life together. It would all fall apart in six months.