30. Scarlett
Scarlett
I sank to my knees for the third time this morning.
There wasn’t anything left in my stomach to empty, but it was revolting, nonetheless.
I hadn’t had that much to drink the other night at Harpoon’s Halloween party, but when I was ill the next morning, I figured I just couldn’t hang like I used to despite still being in my twenties.
Now that it was Sunday and more than twenty-four hours had passed, I was rethinking my theory. I hoped that whatever this bug was that I’d caught would pass quickly.
It was weird though. Besides the frequent trips to the bathroom, I was actually feeling pretty good.
Maeve, Claire, and I had a breakfast at Downtown Diner planned for this morning, so I hauled myself off the bathroom floor and finished getting ready.
Luke had left for work a few hours ago, so it was just me in the house.
It hit me how long it had been since I’d stayed at my own place. I was paying my rent mostly through my savings still. I hadn’t spent much time over the past few weeks looking to fill the days I wasn’t at Daisy’s with a second job, but I really needed to get my butt in gear and figure it out.
Downtown Diner was noisy and full this morning. Luckily, Maeve had snagged us a booth in the back already. I joined her table, and a minute later, Claire sidled up next to me, as well.
“Morning, besties. No kids today?” I asked Maeve.
“Nope. Wyatt’s got them. He’s been working like crazy now that Jackson is in school and can’t help out as much,” she said.
Her brother had started working in Wyatt’s garage as an apprentice mechanic, but he was completing his coursework to be officially certified.
“He hates missing out on time with the girls, so he insisted on a daddy-daughter’s day today.
” A sparkle gleamed in her eyes as she talked about her family.
“Have you talked to Daisy yet?” Claire asked. Maeve hadn’t been at the Halloween party, so we filled her in on how the night ended.
“I talked to her yesterday. She’s okay. She said she was more scared than anything.”
“It’s so crazy what’s happening in this town. The break-ins… assaulting a woman in a bar… poor Alana…” Maeve said, her eyes downcast as she listed the events of the past six months.
“You ladies talking about the other night?” Sheila came up to our table to take our orders. “I heard that she was lucky Luke showed up when he did.”
“And Wes. They both went to check out the scream that they heard. Wes chased after the guy while Luke stayed with Daisy.”
“I wouldn’t want to see Wes gunning after me, that’s for sure. A gentle giant, that man, but I imagine he instills quite the fright,” she said .
We placed our orders, and Sheila dropped them off just a few minutes later.
I shoveled the food into my mouth, ravenous after losing my contents over the past day. I sat back and took a breath, filling my lungs, a fullness settling in my belly.
“Ugh, I’m so bloated,” I complained. “I feel like I’ve been PMSing for a week. I wish my period would just start already.”
“Did you say that you’ve been excessively tired lately too?” Claire asked, her pancakes dripping with syrup on her fork.
“Yeah. I didn’t expect the flower shop to be so exhausting. I’m dead on my feet by the end of the day. Even on my days off, I still feel tired.”
Maeve and Claire caught eyes from across the table. I didn’t like that look. Those silent conversations were never any good. I would know. I had been part of them plenty of times.
“And you’ve been throwing up the last few days?” Claire asked.
“Yes,” I replied slowly.
“And how long have you and Luke been, you know… together?” Maeve asked.
“No.” I was already shaking my head. That line of questioning was only leading to one place. “Nope. Not possible.”
“Even with protection, anything is possible,” Maeve added. My nose crinkled, and I pulled my lips into a tight line. “You do use protection, right?”
“Scarlett…” Claire prodded.
“Sometimes.” My teeth sank into my bottom lip. “I mean, the first time, it just sort of… happened. And after that, it kind of felt like, what was the point? You know.”
“This, Scarlett. This is the point,” Maeve whisper-hissed. “ Are you on birth control, at least?”
I shook my head. I hadn’t needed it for so long, I stopped taking it when my prescription ran out, and that was eight or nine months ago.
“Is your period late?” Maeve asked.
My shoulders came up to my ears. “I wasn’t really paying attention.”
“Have you had your period since you and Luke have been together?” Claire asked.
I pretended to think about it, but honestly, I knew the answer in an instant.
Apparently, my nonanswer was answer enough because Claire shot upright. “We need to get you a test. ASAP.”
My head snapped around the restaurant in panic. I leaned in close, Maeve and Claire both leaning to the center of the table as well. “I can’t go get a pregnancy test. This town will talk. Fast.”
“Well, you need to,” Maeve said.
“We’ll go with you. I’ll buy it. I don’t care if people talk,” Claire offered.
“And what about Reid?” I asked Claire. If word got back to him that Claire had bought a pregnancy test, he would freak.
“I’ll tell him I bought it for a friend. It’s true,” she replied.
My glare told her what I thought of that plan. “You only have two friends, and we’re sitting right here.”
“Hey,” she huffed through her laughter. It was true, and she knew it. “You can always schedule a doctor visit and let them examine you.”
Ugh. “Fine. We’ll get a test, but we’re buying it out of town.”
“Deal.” Claire nodded.
“I’m so excited!” Maeve exclaimed.
* * *
“I can’t be pregnant,” I said for approximately the one-hundredth time. “It’s too soon. Luke just got out of a marriage. The police department is at risk of being thrown into upheaval. He doesn’t need a pregnant girlfriend. Oh my God, am I his girlfriend? We hadn’t really put a label on us.”
“Scarlett, breathe. Take a breath, hon,” Claire said. “Good. In for four seconds… hold… now exhale slowly. Good.”
Claire’s breathing exercises helped to bring down my racing heart.
“Luke is in love with you, Scarlett. Whatever the test comes back with, he’s going to be right there with you.” Maeve rubbed my back softly.
“I know. You’re right.” I pulled my shoulders back. I could do this. Luke and I loved each other. We would be okay regardless of what the test said.
“Alright. Ready to pee on a stick now?” Claire asked.
“I drank the other night.” I spun around in a frenzy, looking between my two best friends. “Oh my God, I can’t be pregnant. I’m already a horrible mother. What if I did something to the baby without knowing?”
“You don’t even know if there is a baby,” Claire said gently.
“And I’m sure you and the hypothetical baby will be fine. A lot of women drink before they find out they’re pregnant,” Maeve added. “You are not going to be a terrible mother. I’ve seen you with Jane and Veda. You will make a fantastic mother, whether it’s now or in the future.”
“Let’s find out, okay? We’ll be waiting right here.”
“Okay.” This time, I did make it into the bathroom .
I left the test on the bathroom counter and waited for the results with Maeve and Claire.
After the longest two minutes of my life, I turned the test over, my friends hovering over my shoulder to look at it too.
A sense of peace washed over me, and I pulled in a gulp of air.
It wasn’t the reaction I was expecting when I saw the two blue lines, but it felt right. Whatever this next chapter held for us, we would wade through it together, Luke and me… and this baby.
A high-pitched squeal sounded in my ear, Maeve’s hands covering her mouth as she tried to rein in her excitement.
“Whew. Okay. How are you feeling?” Claire asked.
I took a deep breath and met her eyes. “Good. I think this might be good.”
“Wow. I was expecting a full freak-out,” Maeve said.
“I don’t know. It just feels right. I don’t know how else to explain it.”
I swore them both to secrecy. I didn’t want word to get out, even to the Wilder brothers, before I had a chance to tell Luke.
“I’m sorry to ask you to keep a secret from your boyfriends. It won’t be forever. I just need to tell Luke first,” I explained to them.
“Don’t even worry about it. This isn’t like I’m keeping something from Reid that affects either him or I. This isn’t my news to tell, so I’m not sharing it until I have permission,” Claire said.
“Same. Wyatt will completely understand. He would be furious if Luke or Reid knew I was pregnant before he did. Your secret is safe with me. ”
“Thanks, ladies.”
Maeve looked at me, a hopeful plea sparkling in his eyes. “So… can we scream and celebrate now?”
A laugh pulled from my lungs. “Yes, Maeve. Let’s celebrate!”
A scream pulled from her lungs as she tapped her feet.
Claire put some music on, and the three of us danced and laughed and cried…
well, maybe I was the only one crying. I had all the faith in the world that Luke would be there with me through everything, but it couldn’t silence my nerves completely.
What if he didn’t want this? What if he only stayed out of obligation?
I shook my head of the thoughts. Those two lines had just flipped my world upside down, but I had never been more sure of anything than I was that I wanted this baby—Luke’s baby—with every fiber of my being.