FIVE #2
Turning back to the racks, Gemma and Hayley quickly sifted through the options until they had successfully gathered a few pieces for Hayley to try on. Hayley managed to avoid any more interrogation, but she knew Gemma would be watching her closely.
Hayley slipped into the first pick, a champagne-colored suit that matched Maddie’s dress, while the others chatted in the waiting lounge.
When Hayley walked out of the dressing room, all three women fell silent, their eyes wide.
“Hay, you look amazing,” Gemma cheered before letting out a playful catcall.
Hayley tried not to look toward Maddie, tried not to care what she thought of the outfit, but her body had other plans. Her eyes, unbidden, drifted anyway.
Maddie was scanning her figure intently, those steady blue eyes drinking her in with an intensity that made Hayley feel exposed.
Hayley subtly lifted her chin in Maddie’s direction, shooting Gemma a look that said, See? I’m not the problem here.
Gemma just rolled her eyes.
With a slow, measured sway of her hips, Hayley turned to head back into the fitting room. When footsteps sounded behind her, she didn’t have to look to know they were Maddie’s. The fresh scent of sun-kissed flowers had reached Hayley first. The woman even smelled like a California Valley Girl.
As she was sliding her arms into the next blazer, Hayley heard Maddie’s perky voice call out from the room next to her.
“Hayley, could you help me?”
“Ask Caitlin,” Hayley replied.
“Come on, you’re right here. I need you to zip me.”
Hayley huffed, debating whether it was worth causing a scene over. Reluctantly, she eased her door open and went to help.
Maddie let her in, holding the front of her dress against her chest with one hand. “Come in.”
Hayley hesitated, her pulse quickening as she moved sideways past Maddie and into the narrow space.
“Could you?” Maddie gestured toward her lower back, where the zipper hung just out of reach.
Hayley’s fingers accidentally brushed against Maddie’s bare skin as she reached for the metal, shocking them both.
Despite the warmth of her hand, a wave of goosebumps prickled across Maddie’s back.
Hayley swallowed against the thrum that vibrated through her, focusing desperately on guiding the silver pull upward as Maddie’s breathing hitched.
The moment the zipper clicked into place, Maddie spun, their faces now only a breath apart.
Hayley froze, pinned to the spot by Maddie’s burning gaze. Her own eyes betrayed her, dropping to the full, pink lips inches from hers. They were the color of rose petals touched by morning light, and Hayley suddenly needed to know if they were just as soft.
They both began to lean in, and Hayley felt helpless as if it were gravity pulling them together, until Gemma’s voice rang out through Hayley’s mind.
You’ll break her heart.
Hayley straightened and took a sharp step backward, her back hitting the wall.
Maddie’s eyes fluttered open in confusion. Her lips were still parted, her face flushed, as she searched Hayley for an explanation.
The cramped room started to spin. Hayley’s mind moved in slow motion as she tried, and failed, to piece a sentence together.
What is wrong with me?
Hayley felt completely and utterly out of control, her body moving without permission. Cold panic slid down her spine like ice.
She needed to get out of there, needed to find more oxygen. She rushed out of the fitting rooms and into the bright chatter of the lounge, quickly rearranging her expression as Gemma and Caitlin turned toward her.
The rest of the appointment passed in a fog as Hayley slipped in and out of outfits that barely registered, her mind whirling.
They must have tried on at least six more options before finally settling on the original champagne dress and suit.
Once the purchases were finalized, they hit the thick, humid air of the street, and Hayley immediately missed the store’s cool air conditioning.
Caitlin paused on the sidewalk, drawing the group into a loose huddle. “Hayley, do you want to come over and hang out with us for a bit?”
No.
She needed to get away from there, away from Maddie. She needed to regain control of herself.
“Sure.”
Fuck.
Hayley followed behind numbly as the group walked toward Caitlin and Gemma’s, a cold sweat prickling across her skin even with the sun already buried behind the skyline. She drew in a long, slow breath through her nose to quell the new coil of nausea in her stomach.
She had almost kissed Maddie.
Again.
A few short months ago, her senses dulled by the thrill of the Oscars—and far too much scotch—Hayley had allowed Maddie to get too close for the first time.
As they stumbled out of the afterparty’s doors together, Maddie insisted on seeing Hayley back to Gemma’s safely.
She normally would have refused, but for some reason, it felt nice to have someone watch out for her that night.
On the doorstep, their eyes had met in a silent, charged challenge.
She still didn’t know who leaned in first. But just as their lips were about to touch, Hayley lurched to the side and reached for the doorknob, desperate to put a barrier between them.
The next morning, she had blamed the liquor for the way she had swayed into Maddie.
But she hadn’t been drinking today. Her hands began to tremble as her knees locked up, slowing her pace on the sidewalk.
Gemma turned back, noticing Hayley was trailing behind. “Hay, are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” Hayley kept her eyes glued to her feet, her voice trembling.
“You’re not.” Gemma halted, gesturing for Caitlin and Maddie to go on ahead. “You look pale. Drink this.” She handed Hayley the bottle she had been carrying.
Hayley gulped the ice-cold water, letting the shock ground her thoughts. “Probably just one too many glasses of Macallan last night.”
Gemma’s eyebrows pinched together with concern as she searched Hayley’s face. She didn’t buy it.
“Maddie tried to kiss me in the dressing room,” Hayley whispered.
“She what?” Gemma sputtered, gripping her by the arm.
Hayley was having trouble meeting Gemma’s eyes. Instead, she focused on the sidewalk ahead.
“She asked me to zip her dress for her, and the next thing I knew, we were face-to-face, and she was leaning in, and then I was leaning in, and…” The thought of kissing anyone, let alone Maddie, made Hayley feel dizzy. “But I didn’t, I promise. I left.” She finally looked Gemma in the eye.
Gemma held her gaze intently and nodded once, but the shadow of concern didn’t vanish.
After a moment, her best friend asked softly, “But did you want to kiss her?”
She understood the weight behind Gemma’s question.
Hayley hadn’t kissed anyone since she was a teenager, during her first and only relationship.
Sex was one thing, but kissing, kissing was too intimate, too real.
It was a hard boundary she’d enforced with all her sexual partners for nearly two decades, and Gemma knew that. Had she wanted to kiss Maddie, though?
Hayley hesitated, a knot tightening in her stomach. “No. Of course not.” Her voice didn’t sound convincing, even to her own ears.
Gemma’s eyebrow inched upward, but all she said was, “Good.”
They fell into a silent rhythm, Hayley keeping her arm linked with Gemma’s for comfort. She no longer felt certain of anything.
Caitlin and Maddie were still a few yards ahead, locked in their own conversation as they reached the front door. Hayley had mere minutes alone with Gemma.