SIX
THE CITY OUTSIDE WAS QUIETER THAN normal. Maddie rolled over and tapped her phone screen. It was only four in the morning. She sighed, letting her head sink back into the feather pillow.
The voice in Maddie’s head wouldn’t let up, stealing her sleep with the same insistent questions on a loop.
What if she had leaned in that last inch?
What if she had just gone for it and pressed her lips to Hayley’s?
Would she have finally seen the woman beneath the armor?
The cracks were there now subtle but real, and Maddie yearned to split them open.
She’d always been too curious for her own good.
She exhaled slowly and finally gave in. Opening the wedding group chat, she started a new message privately to Hayley.
Maddie: Did you make it home okay?
Maddie knew it was a thin excuse to text her. Hayley had left the house hours ago. She was most likely sound asleep by now.
Just as she was about to set her phone back down, it vibrated, the bright screen cutting through the dark room. Maddie’s heart skipped.
Hayley: I did.
A short, two-word text, yet Maddie found herself smirking at the screen anyway. It didn’t matter how terse Hayley was—she had still replied in the middle of the night.
Maddie: You should've stayed. There's plenty of room in my bed.
Maddie’s pulse raced as the three typing bubbles danced, only to vanish. Once, twice, three times, before the phone finally buzzed with a reply.
Hayley: I didn't have nearly enough wine for that to have been an option.
Maddie: We can certainly change that. Let me take you out for drinks tomorrow night.
Hayley: I'm busy.
Maddie hesitated, first typing out With who? before quickly deleting it. She drew her hands back from the glass, took a deep breath, and tried again.
Maddie: Busy thinking about how you almost kissed me for the second time?
Maddie stared at the glowing screen, waiting patiently for a new gray bubble to appear, but it never did.
Minutes ticked by, and she wondered if Hayley had fallen asleep or if Maddie had finally managed to render her speechless.
She wasn’t planning on letting Hayley off the hook for either of those almost-kisses, but the small victory of shaking her up a bit finally lulled Maddie to sleep.
——
Maddie woke up again a few hours later, well after sunrise. She’d never needed much sleep. She worked full days on set after a night out and a quick nap. Without lines to memorize or excess liquor sweating from her pores, she was confident she could handle whatever the day would throw at her.
Caitlin looked up from her seat at the kitchen island as Maddie walked in. “Morning Mads.”
“How’d you sleep?” Gemma asked from beside Caitlin, two half-full cups of coffee in front of them.
“Morning. Not the worst night I’ve had.” Maddie pulled a mug from the cabinet. “What about you two?”
“Great,” they chimed in unison, then exchanged a giggling look.
Despite the fact that their bedroom was on the floor above Maddie’s, she had heard unmistakable sounds late in the night while heading into the kitchen for a glass of water. Even if she hadn’t, the morning-after glow on Gemma and Caitlin’s faces would have given away their midnight rendezvous.
“I cannot figure Hayley out,” Maddie blurted, her spoon clinking loudly against the mug as she stirred creamer into her coffee a little too vigorously.
Caitlin and Gemma’s eyes met in silence. Then Gemma sighed.
“Hayley’s had a tough life,” Gemma offered, glancing out the kitchen window.
She paused in thought before continuing, unaware of how Maddie was hanging on to her every word.
“She had to grow up a lot faster than most of us. She’s been taking care of her dad and brother since she was only fifteen, and it wasn’t easy for her. ”
“Why are you asking, though?” Caitlin studied Maddie hesitantly, looking concerned. “Did something happen between you two?”
“No.” Maddie leaned back against the countertop, sipping her coffee. “But it’s not for a lack of trying.”
“Mads…” Gemma’s voice was serious but not unkind. She set her mug down. “You know Hayley’s my best friend, and I love her. But I think it’s for the best if you two just stay in your own lanes.”
“Gem’s right,” Caitlin added. “I told you, Hayley and relationships don’t mix. You’re going to find your person, Mads, I know it. But it’s just not Hayley.”
Maddie let out an exasperated breath. “I just don’t understand why. She’s beautiful—a bit scary, but in a sexy, mysterious way, you know? It’s like she’s stuck in this darkness, though, and I want to pull her out into the light. Does that make any sense?” She wasn’t sure that it did.
“Believe me, it does. I spent the first five years of our friendship trying to get her to see the other side, but ultimately I had to learn to accept Hayley the way she is.” Gemma’s words turned sad. “You aren’t going to change her.”
“I just want to jump in for a second here, Mads, and remind you of what you’ve always told me—you want marriage, a soulmate, right?
” Caitlin didn’t wait for an answer. “Well, this isn’t The Proposal, and you aren’t Ryan Reynolds.
You’re not going to swoop in and make the ice queen fall in love for the first time. ”
Maddie laughed, which she figured had been Caitlin’s goal. The idea of Betty White—may she rest in peace—giving Hayley a “baby-making blanket” almost sent her into hysterics.
Still laughing, Caitlin moved around the kitchen island and reached for Maddie’s hand.
“Look, I say this with love. You always try to change women instead of just accepting them for who they are. It’s not your fault, you love a good rom-com with a happy ending.
But the right person won’t need to be changed. ”
“When have I ever tried to change someone?” Maddie asked, pressing her lips into a thin line as her grip tightened around her mug.
“Well, let’s see. There was that actress, Gina, who told you she would never come out, yet you kept dating her because you thought you could change her mind.
Then there was Zoey, who, I guess, technically changed you.
You spent months pretending you wanted an open relationship because she said she’d never be monogamous.
And then there’s Kim. I don’t think I even need to elaborate, considering you’re still trying to fit that square peg into a round hole. ”
Maddie’s mouth hung open slightly.
Well, shit. How had she never realized this about herself?
“Wait.” Maddie’s mind caught up, her head snapping toward Caitlin. “How do you know about Kim?”
“Michelle,” Caitlin responded as if it was obvious.
“Michelle?” Maddie repeated, confused, looking back and forth between her friends.
Caitlin had started dating Michelle at the same time that Maddie began seeing Kim—the two women were best friends. Unfortunately for Michelle, though, that was also when Caitlin had reunited with Gemma, so Michelle ended up with the short end of the stick.
“Yes, Michelle. We met for coffee when I went back to LA after the movie so I could apologize—remember? Well, she must not have hated me too much because she asked if we could keep in touch as friends. She texted me the afternoon she ran into you leaving Kim’s place.”
Gemma inhaled sharply like something had just clicked.
Maddie and Caitlin both turned to look at her.
“Sorry.” Gemma gestured for them to continue. “Please, go on.”
“I forgot you two still talk.” Maddie directed her attention toward Caitlin. She hadn’t been trying to hide her relationship with Kim, but she wasn’t exactly broadcasting it either. “Michelle does seem happy with her new girlfriend.”
“She does, and I’m really glad to see it.
Gemma and I are actually having dinner with them both the next time we’re in LA.
” Caitlin waved her hands in a cutting motion.
“But we’re getting off topic. We can discuss Kim and the fact that she’s bad for you later.
The point is, you and Hayley are not a good idea. ”
“Oh! I know!” Gemma excitedly shouted, her eyes lighting up. “My friend Nina is single. I bet you two would really hit it off. We worked on NYPD Intelligence together. Let me set you up for drinks.”
“Okay, sure. Thanks, Gem,” Maddie agreed half-heartedly.
She wasn’t against going on a blind date, but she couldn’t shake the feeling of wanting a night like that with Hayley instead.
The fact that Hayley wanted nothing to do with her should have been enough to drive Maddie away, but for some reason, it hadn’t.
It only made her more determined to get closer.
Pushing Hayley out of her mind, Maddie placed her empty coffee mug into the dishwasher. She needed to find a local workout class and burn off her pent-up energy.