Chapter 42 Sloane
SLOANE
~SEPTEMBER~
Icheck my dress and hair in the mirror for like the tenth time. I don’t know why I’m so nervous; I’ve actually never been more nervous than I am right now.
Today is the day.
The day that has been haunting me since the first moment he kissed me.
“Sloane, you need to breathe,” Beckett says, rubbing my shoulders.
I take a deep breath and then another.
“You ready?” He asks, kissing the top of my head.
No.
I don’t think that there’s anything that can prepare me for what is going to happen tonight.
But I lie. “Yes.”
He watches me in the mirror for a few more seconds before choosing to pull me away from the room and the house before I can change my mind, and cancel the plans that we’ve made.
My leg bounces the entire drive anxiously, and there are a few moments where I almost ask him to stop so I can lose what little is in my stomach.
“You sure you’re ok? You look like you’re going to be sick,” he says, giving my thigh a little squeeze.
“Mhmm.” I nod and slowly open my door so that I don’t make him take us home.
We walk into the restaurant and tell the hostess our names, and she leads us to the back of the restaurant.
“Briar, Chanel, I’d like for you to meet my girlfriend, Sloane.”
Briar stares at me, and for once in his life, he’s speechless.
Beckett pulls out my chair for me, I sit down, he sits next to me, and I’m honestly not sure what to say, and my brain kinda stops working.
“Hi,” I say with a small smile. This is a horrible fucking idea. I don’t know why I let him convince me to do this. Basically, this is just Beckett’s fuck you to Briar for being horrible to me in my whole life. I don’t know why I’m here. I’m literally shitting myself right now.
“What the fuck is going on right now?”
“We’re having a double date like you requested,” Beckett says, picking up the menu and browsing through it like this isn’t the most awkward thing to ever happen in the existence of any person at this table’s life.
“Yeah, why is my daughter sitting across from me?”
He’s doing a rather good job at keeping his voice low, despite the fact that his hands are clenched tight enough around his champagne glass that it could break.
“Because she’s my girlfriend,” Beckett says, the word sounding so good coming from his mouth.
I think that this is the first time I’ve ever heard him use the word out loud. I like it a lot more than I should.
“Shouldn’t you be back in Athens for your next semester of school?” Briar asks, addressing me directly for the first time since we walked in.
“I’m going to finish my degree online and move back here permanently,” I say, lifting the glass of water with a slightly shaky hand.
“So what’s happening exactly? You guys just decided to what? Move in together, fuck, and that’s that, the rest of us are just supposed to be ok with it? She’s twenty-one, Beckett.”
“Briar,” Chanel hisses, looking around with a fake smile as Briar’s voice gets progressively louder.
“No, this is fucking crazy. How long has this been going on for? Were there…Did you…” He can’t even find his words, and I knew that doing this in public was a horrible idea.
Beckett suggested it because maybe it would force Briar to behave since people would be watching, but that doesn’t seem to be the case.
“It happened just this summer. And before you go off half-cocked, accusing me of something horrendous, let me stop you. Not once have I ever sought her out until this summer, and not once did I look at her in any way that was inappropriate before just a few months ago,” Beckett says, with a surprising amount of calm.
“You expect me to just believe you. You’ve had ample chances to tell me that something was happening, and you lied to me every time I saw you.”
“I never lied, I just withheld information. You know, kinda like how you’ve just forgot to mention that she isn’t even your fucking kid.” Beckett points out, and that earns him a sharp glare.
I gasp, and so does Chanel. I had no idea we were airing out all the fucking laundry today. I blink hard, once, then twice. My heart feels like it’s going to explode, and I don’t know what to do.
“Get up, we’re leaving.”
For a minute, I think that he’s talking to Chanel, but when I look up, I realize that he is talking to me.
He doesn’t even try to deny Beckett’s statement. Just stares at me with something that I don’t know how to name.
“Excuse me?” I whisper, trying to keep the fear out of my voice. I’ve never stood up to Briar before, but tonight might force me to.
“You heard me, get up, we are leaving.”
“No.” My voice is shaky as it comes out. I have the sudden urge to projectile vomit all over everything, but by some miracle of God, I’m able to keep it down.
Beckett’s hand finds my thigh and gives it a small squeeze, which brings me a lot of comfort.
“It isn’t up for negotiation.” Briar’s voice is stern, like he is talking to a disobedient child and not a grown adult.
“I don’t have to go with you,” I say, and I surprise myself by keeping eye contact with him the whole time. I don’t even stutter once.
“Why’s that, because you’re an adult now? You think that you can make your own choices because you moved out? I still pay for all your shit, Sloane, so I—”
The words come flying out of my mouth before I can stop them, cutting him off and making him stare at me wide-eyed.
“I pay for my own things. I don’t have any support from you or from Monica, and it has been that way since I moved out.
I don’t need your permission to do things, and I’m not asking your blessing in dating Beckett.
I just figured that you would have liked to know.
If you would like to leave, the door is that way. ”
My whole body feels like it’s trembling so hard by the time I finish my little speech, but Beckett’s hand on my leg keeps me grounded, even if it’s just slightly.
Briar stares at me for several long seconds before looking at Beckett, who looks a lot more smug than he should be, considering I probably just severed what remained of the connection between Briar and me.
Channel looks almost proud of me, and it warms my heart, bringing me another smidge of peace.
“Let’s go,” he says, standing up abruptly and moving behind Chanel’s chair, to which she does obey. She takes his arm, offering me and Beckett both a small smile before the two of them walk away in a flurry of hushed whispers. I can only imagine what is being said.
“Well, that went better than I was expecting,” Beckett says after we sit in silence for a few long seconds.
“Yeah,” I choke out, looking over at him, the weight of what I might have just done hitting me hard. He might not be my real dad, but he is the only dad I’ve ever had.
“Hey, it’s ok. Don’t cry, baby,” he whispers, kissing my forehead, and I nod, trying to pull myself together.
“What can I get for you two?” a waitress asks, looking at us and then at the empty seats across from us.
“Can I have a glass of white wine?” I say, pulling out my ID and handing it to her.
“Sure, what kind, dear?”
Well, shit, I don’t know. I’ve never done this before, lady. I just did something very hard, and the adult thing to do seems like ordering a large glass of wine.
Of course, or luckily, those inside thoughts stay exactly where they should be. When I don’t answer and just stare at her blankly, Beckett comes to the rescue, pointing to one of the wines on the menu, and she nods before taking his drink order.
“And for them?” She asks, looking at the now-empty seats across from the two of us.
“They had an urgent emergency that they had to tend to; they won’t be joining us,” Beckett says, giving my thigh another squeeze. The waitress nods before clearing off their side of the table and pushing their chairs in before leaving to get our drinks.
“This is nice. I think I could get used to taking my girl out in public like this,” Beckett hums, bringing my hands up to his lips and kissing the knuckles. I instantly feel ten times better than I did just moments ago.
“Yeah, I think that I would like this, too,” I say, giving his hand a squeeze back, my heart rate coming back down to normal. “Why did I order wine? I’ve never even tried wine,” I say, my eyes widening in horror, and Beckett just laughs at me.
“God, you’re so cute, baby,” he says, kissing my forehead again.
“This isn’t something to be joking about, Beckett. I just ordered wine. That was my instinctual reaction to Briar storming out of here after I just defied him for the first time in my life.”
“You looked hot as hell while doing it,” he says with a smirk, and I whine, my head falling back against my chair, letting out a groan.
“You’re not helping. I probably just severed my last tie with my family.”
“He’s just surprised, and he doesn’t like to be taken by surprise.
Just give him some time, until then, you and I have a lot to catch up on,” he says, letting go of my hand and grabbing my chin with his fingers, making me look at him.
I don’t fight him; I’ve already done enough defying authority today.
I think I’d rather just let him boss me around.
I no longer like making adult decisions; it’s very clear that I don’t make smart ones while under pressure.
“What do you mean?” I ask, my brows scrunching in confusion.
“I mean, me, you, and Mocha have to do everything as a family now,” he points out, his eyes shining in a way I’ve never seen before.
“How is that different from the way we were doing things before?”
“I don’t have to give a fuck about people seeing us. I get to hug you and kiss you and do whatever I want to you, whenever I want, with no care in the world, baby,” he says, pressing another kiss to my forehead.
“I thought you were against telling Briar everything so soon after I decided to stay?”
“No, baby, that was you,” he reminds me as the waitress comes back with our drinks and some bread.
“Right…yeah, that was me.”
“Are you guys ready to order?” she asks, looking at us. I pick up the menu, which I haven’t even looked at yet.
“Give us just a few more minutes,” Beckett says, and she nods before leaving us once again.
I grab my adult beverage and stare at the off-clear liquid for a long time before bringing the glass up to my lips and taking a small sip.
“Oh, that’s much better than whatever you had in the kitchen that one night,” I say, taking a slightly longer sip, before setting the glass back down.
He just laughs and shakes his head before looking down at his own menu.
Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all.