21. Cole
“She never misses, does she?” Blair raves across the picnic table, looking adoringly at the blackened ribeye strips on her plate. Beside her, Graham shakes his head, his mouth too full to do anything other than grunt his agreement.
I pick at my own empty plate, having ravished my meal already. Blair is not wrong. I’ve never had food as good as the kind Shirley makes. I don’t know what she puts in it, but whatever it is, it has some kind of magic. A home-cooked meal has always been a rarity for me, so I have to admit I’m soaking this up while I can.
“Neal finished framing the walls today for your new apartment,” Sydney tells them from where she sits on the other side of Graham. “You’ll have to go check it out in the morning.”
Blair gasps. “Ooh, that’s so exciting.”
Graham slides his arm all the way around Blair’s shoulder, letting his hand hang in front of her as he buries his face in her hair.
“I can’t wait,” he whispers, words clearly meant just for her. I look down at my plate, feeling like I’m intruding on an intimate moment between them.
“Hopefully the rest of the lodge reno will go fast,” he says to me as he straightens. “Sorry again for displacing you, Cole.”
“It hasn’t been so bad.” I shrug. Sydney looks up from her own plate, meeting my eyes for a split second before looking away.
It really hasn’t been terrible staying with Sydney. There’s an easiness between us now that is reminiscent of the way it used to be, especially after opening up to her yesterday about my past with my dad, which I was surprised to find ended up being a sort of cathartic release for me.
I didn’t realize how much I was needing to speak that part of me out loud, how much it needed to be released from the deep cavern I’ve kept it in until now.
I also didn’t realize how much my hasty exit back then would have affected Sydney—and how much it still affected her opinion of me now. Of course she crossed my mind once my life settled down and the wounds healed, but at that point I got wind of the rumor and was too annoyed to do anything but write her off for good. I truly didn’t think much of it until she showed up on my cabin doorstep.
But I’m man enough to pinpoint my faults, and leaving Sydney hanging is definitely a relevant one. I don’t like that I unknowingly hurt her like that. Not one bit.
“Are you ready?” Blair asks Graham while climbing out of the picnic table. “It looks like there’s a line forming for rides back down to the cabins.”
“Yup.” Graham wipes his hands in a napkin and rises.
“See you both later,” he says to Sydney and me.
“See ya,” we say at the same time.
When it’s just the two of us left, Sydney slides her plate over until she’s directly across from me.
“Hi,” she says quietly, as if being alone requires an entirely new greeting. It brings a crooked smile to my lips.
“Hi,” I say in return, setting my fork down. I’m done eating, but I might as well stay until she’s done to offer her a ride back.
“How’s the bear statue coming?” she asks.
“I’m almost done. I just need to put some oils on it over the next day or so.”
“Really?” Her brows fly up and pure excitement flashes across her face. “Is it here? Can I see it?”
Her reaction catches me off guard. “You want to see the bear?”
“Of course,” she says with a look as if it should be obvious that she does.
It’s not obvious to me.
“Uh, sure.”
“Let’s go, then.” She grabs her plate and climbs over the bench seat. I do the same, following her to the garbage bin. All the while, I convince myself that she probably wants to see the bear to make sure it’s perfect enough for the lodge. That’s the most likely reason.
I lead the way down to the beach, feeling weirdly unsettled. There isn’t usually anyone that I share my projects with, especially at the unfinished stage. I’m not exactly sure how to feel, but it feels an awful lot like I’m putting a piece of myself on display. I don’t know why, but showing it to her when it’s not yet complete feels vulnerable in a way I didn’t expect.
Midway down the hill, I turn to face her. “Okay, no peeking.”
I move behind her to cover her eyes with my hands. I’m aware that I probably shouldn’t, but I can’t help zeroing in on the way her skin feels under mine. Soft and warm. Grazing it feels forbidden in a way, knowing what her feelings of me have been until recently.
Clearing my throat, I lead her the rest of the way down to shore, making sure there aren’t any stray branches she could trip over on the way.
“Are your eyes closed?” I ask.
“Your hands are glued to my eyeballs, so I would say yes,” she mutters.
Lining her up with the statue, I release my hands and step aside.
“Okay. Open,” I tell her, sliding my hands into my pockets as a way of bracing myself.
Her eyes fly open instantly, and all of a sudden, I’m grateful for this clear view of her face. Watching her reaction—the way she lights up—sends a flush of something down my spine. Her jaw drops open, and a wide smile spreads as a giggle comes out of her.
“Cole,” she says in a half-laugh, half-whisper, “this is incredible.”
I swallow down a grin of my own as another wave of warmth rises in my chest. She steps closer to the statue and runs her hand along the surface, covering every detail line and curve of the bear.
“I mean it.” She looks over at me earnestly. “I absolutely love it.”
Seeing the look of admiration on her face does something to me—more than just physically. It creates a sense of pride for my work that I don’t normally feel. I feel content with the work I do, sure, but I’ve never been one to fully take in the glowing reviews I receive. For whatever reason, I don’t let the praise settle deep enough to believe them.
I choose to ignore the lingering question in the back of my mind of whether this feeling is from having anyone admire my work…or if it’s because that person is her.
“Thanks,” I say, shifting my weight.
“I mean, your end table is nice, but this…” She smirks. “This is next level.”
I huff a soft laugh, not knowing any other way to take the compliment.
“How did you do this?” She runs her hand along the outstretched arm.
“Do you want a step-by-step tutorial?” I smirk, watching her every move as she circles the bear again.
“Maybe,” she says cheekily.
“Well…” I run my hand along my jaw. “First I gather my tools—”
“I’m just kidding. I won’t make you explain it all.” She beams as she walks toward me.
“Something tells me if I did, you’d go out and carve a whole animal just to prove it’s better than mine,” I mumble.
“You’re probably not wrong.” She shrugs pointedly, standing next to me as we watch the sun start to set behind the bear.
“It’s starting to get dark,” I point out.
“Let’s go,” she says, walking off the beach.
I follow her back up to find Shirley is already inside the cabin for the night, and there are no guests left outside. Sydney beats me to the ATV and climbs on the back while I slide between her and the handles.
It might just be my imagination, but I swear she slides ever so slightly forward, closing the distance between us until her legs are flush with the back of mine. Any other time I’ve given her a ride, she’s kept her distance, so I immediately pick up on this subtle movement.
I start the machine up and take us back to cabin twelve. On the way, I realize I might just be starting to grow fond of staying down here by the lodge. Cabin twelve feels a lot less lonely than my own cabin does.
Once inside, I slide my boots off while eyeing the puzzle she’s clearly made headway on. The loon’s entire body is finished, with just the frame and outer pieces left to be filled in. I happen to spot a piece that might fit, and before going to pull out the cot, I quietly slide it into place.
The faint sound of angry mumbling brings me partially awake, but it’s the slam of the front door that causes me to bolt upright.
“What the—” I grumble.
A surprised shriek bursts out of Sydney as she falls against the now closed door.
“Oh, I’m so sorry.” She clutches a hand on her chest to catch her breath. “I figured you’d be awake and gone by the time I came back.”
“That was quite the wake-up call,” I mumble, stretching my neck side to side and twisting my back to loosen my stiff muscles from sleeping on the cot.
“My bad.” She cringes, placing what looks to be a journal of some sort on the table.
“What were you mumbling about?” I ask, rising to put the cot away for the day.
“The wrong flooring was delivered.” She sighs. “Five pallet racks of the wrong floor color are currently sitting next to the lodge.”
“And you can’t just use it?”
“No,” she says pointedly. “It’s three shades too dark and would throw off the whole aesthetic of the lodge. It has to be perfect…and this is not it.”
I nod, staying quiet to let her vent.
“It’s too late to replace—it would take too long to deliver from Minneapolis—so now I need to run into town and pick out something from the hardware store that’s in stock and can be loaded on the ferry by Monday.”
She slumps in the chair, sighing again. Then she flicks her eyes to me. “What are you up to today? Want to come with me?”
“To Baudette?” My brows furrow, clearly still not fully awake.
“Yeah.” She shrugs. “It might be nice to have some company. Besides, you might actually be of some help. You’re good with wood and all that stuff.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.” I have to put another coat of finisher on the bear, but I can do that this afternoon. And truthfully, I don’t hate the idea of spending more time with her.
“Sure, I’ll come with.”
“Alright, hurry up. The ferry will be here soon.”
“Have you always been this bossy?” I huff.
“Yup,” she says but with a smile this time.
I get myself put together for the day and make us two to-go coffee cups while she works on her laptop. Then I meet her at the door, offering her one of the cups.
The sound of a nail gun driving nails into wood and the faint sound of a Bobcat behind the lodge becomes more prominent as we get closer to the docks. Neal’s men are stationed in and around the lodge, not hard to miss with their neon-yellow safety vests and hard hats.
“It’s looking really good,” I say to Sydney, pointing to the lodge.
“Besides the floor,” she says flatly. “It’s not perfect.”
As we load onto the ferry, I wonder how much pressure she feels to get this right, how much of the weight of this reno she’s putting on herself.
I climb in and settle into the spot next to her. As we pull out of the bay we fall quiet, listening to the hum of the motor and the howl of the wind that brushes against our faces.
The boat ride is uneventful, aside from pointing out some random birds flying low above us. As we reach the marina, I notice the slow sweeping breaths she keeps taking. I recognize it because it’s usually the same thing I do when I’m bracing myself to head into town.
“After you.” I let her climb onto the dock before following after her.
There’s a strange sort of nostalgic feeling when we make our way onto the sidewalk. That feeling you sometimes get when you feel like you’ve been in that exact situation before. Not too long ago, she was walking by my side along this same sidewalk to the bait shop. I remember it as if it was yesterday.
As we get closer to the hardware store, I pick up on the way Sydney keeps flicking her eyes to the road that travels east out of town—toward the nursing home.
“Is that where your mom is?” I ask, then immediately regret blurting it out. “I’m sorry. We don’t have to talk about—”
“No, it’s okay.” She gives me a soft smile before looking down at the ground. “Yes, she’s there. I, uh…haven’t been there in a couple years.”
Her words might be innocent to most, but I see them for what they are. An opening. A confession of sorts in this volley of truths we seem to be baring. Perhaps it’s her turn to share a piece of her story I wasn’t a part of.
“I came back often after I left for college—a lot, actually. Every single weekend, I’d come home. But eventually, once she couldn’t remember who I was anymore, it just…got too hard,” she admits.
“I can see how that would be really hard,” I mumble quietly.
She doesn’t expand and I don’t push. We walk the rest of the way without talking, knowing that words aren’t always necessary. Sometimes silence is the better option when the world can be so loud as it is.
“Let’s find you the perfect floor, huh?” I hold the door to the hardware store open and follow her inside.