37. Pussy Doesn’t Like You
Chapter 37
Pussy Doesn’t Like You
CINDER
C harming asked me to give him until tomorrow, but I'm not sure I can.
After the garden party, I practically fled to the Common World. Grateful for my shift at Poison Apple, I ground myself in the motions of serving drinks, remembering who the fuck I am.
Even with Kai sitting mere feet away, watching me, it’s easy to remember who I am when I’m surrounded by other badass females. Snow flashes me a quick gleaming smile just before she hauls six shot glasses up onto the bar in one motion.
Goldie’s ass shakes as she takes a quick break to groove with one of the bar patrons who dances with her from the other side. Both of them sing loudly along to the popular tune. The lights turn pink, bathing Goldie in her signature color. Ted sits at the bar, his eyes locked on her as if she is the only thing in the universe.
“Hey, you good?” a voice interrupts. Rap is behind me, taking some numbers for stock orders.
“Yeah, yes,” I say, going to fill a pitcher of beer. My boss's sharp eyes never miss anything. She doesn’t ask for more of an explanation, but she continues to work.
I will be good. Once I break things off with Kai and return to my normal life.
After my shift, Kai insists on dragging me to some mystery location. I'm exhausted and my nerves are still raw from the confrontation with my stepfamily, but he's relentless.
“Where are we going?” I demand, struggling to keep pace with his long strides.
“You'll see,” is all he says, that infuriating smirk playing at his lips.
We stop in front of a nondescript building. Kai ushers me inside, ignoring my protests. But the moment I cross the threshold, the words die on my tongue.
It's a studio. A real, honest-to-gods art studio. The space is open and stacked with art supplies. The faint scent of paint and creation lingers in the air, beckoning me.
“What is this?” I round on Kai, my voice sharp.
He shrugs, hands in his pockets. “It's yours. For as long as you want it.”
Kai's words hit me like a punch to the gut. A studio? For me?
My heart clenches painfully in my chest. The offer is tempting, dangerously so. The studio feels like a trap, a shiny lure designed to lower my defenses.
I scoff, crossing my arms. “I don't need your handouts. I'm not some charity case for you to fix with your endless riches.”
Something flickers in his eyes, but he keeps his tone light. “It's not a handout, Cinder. It's an investment. In you, in your talent.”
“You don't know anything about my talent.”
“Don't I?” He steps closer, his gaze intense. “I've seen your paintings. You try to hide them, but I couldn’t help take a sneak peek at more than a couple. They're incredible, Cinder. The world deserves to see them.”
My heart stutters. He's seen my art in my bedroom. The pieces I've never shown anyone, the ones that are too raw, too real.
Part of me wants to melt at his thoughtfulness, but another part still bristles. I don't need him to swoop in and save me. I've survived on my own for years.
Even as I think it, a small voice whispers: Maybe it's not charity. Maybe he really believes in you.
“That's also why I got you a show,” he goes on. “At a gallery downtown. Whenever you're ready.”
Anger surges through me, hot and bright. How dare he presume to know what's best for me, to make decisions about my life and my art.
It's just like Marisela all over again, pretending to care while secretly plotting to control me. The sour taste of bile rises in my throat at the thought. No, I won’t let myself be fooled again. Trusting others only leads to pain. “I don't want your pity showcase, Kai. I'm not some pet project for you to parade around.”
He’s trying to trap me. Bribe me into staying. But I won’t be forced to spend time with my steps.
Though fuck him for pulling out all the stops on what I want. He knows me too well and it borders on scary.
“It's not pity,” he says, his voice low and fierce. “It's belief. In you, in what you can do.” He takes my hand, his touch searing. “You have a gift, Cinder. Don't let your pride stop you from sharing it.”
I yank my hand away, my skin burning. “My pride is all I have. It's what's kept me alive, kept me fighting. I won't let you take that from me.”
Kai's eyes soften. “I'm not trying to take anything from you. I'm trying to give you a chance. To show the world who you are, what you're capable of.”
I turn away, my throat tight. The temptation is so strong. To take what he's offering, to let myself believe that I could be more than a servant, more than a survivor.
But it feels too easy. Too good to be true.
“I won't interfere,” Kai says quietly. “The studio, the show. . . they're yours. What you do with them is up to you.”
I don't respond. I can't. If I open my mouth, I'm afraid all my secrets will come spilling out.
It's everything I've ever wanted - someone who believes in me, who supports my dreams without trying to control me.
The bitter voice in the back of my mind won't be silenced. It whispers insidiously, reminding me of all the times I had dared to hope.
“If you are trying to convince me to stay in Midnight, you are fucking up real bad.” I run my hand over the smooth wood of the easel. “Because all I want to do is hide in here.”
“This isn’t the real thing I wanted to show you,” he says, slipping his hands in his pockets. “ But if this is a refuge and convenient hiding place you can use it for that.” Kaison gives me a lopsided smile. “After you come see the real thing I want to share.”
Something is clawing under my skin and burrowing its way into vital organs. Gratitude? Attachment? No matter what it is, I can’t trust it.
Kai sighs. “We should get to Midnight. Before we're missed.”
Numbly, I follow him out of the studio and to my apartment trying not to love every single fucking thing he’s just given me.
Trying not to love him .
It’s just another reason to leave the whole situation. We were never going to end up together. The agreement is going to come to an end whether it’s now or later.
The only reason I agree to return is because I need to get my stuff. I’m not leaving my grim reaper doll for anyone, and iron supplements are expensive as shit. I’ll go, get my stuff, and let him make his final plea before I peace out to the Common World, never to look back again.
As we slip on the glass slippers, preparing to return to Midnight, a black streak comes hurtling out of nowhere.
Lucifer attacks with a vengeance, yowling and clawing. I cry out, trying to fend him off, but it's too late. The world tilts, reality bending around us.
We land in a heap on the cold stone floor of the castle. Lucifer hisses once more before darting off into the shadowy corridors.
I lay there, my heart racing.
“You okay?” Kaison asks.
“Yep,” I say popping my ‘P,’ not bothering to hide my irritation.
“The cat kind of sucks,” he confesses with a grumble.
“Guess pussy doesn’t love you as much as you thought it did.”