Chapter Forty-One
Jonas was meant to graduate from Wetherford this year.
Livvy was supposed to attend Wetherford too. But she couldn’t bring herself to attend the school where she was meant to start with her twin brother. Not after he drowned nearly five years ago when he fell off the cliff.
Instead, she spent the past four years at Hollis High while living three houses down from me. For three of those years, she didn’t talk to me. Never even looked at me.
Not until this year, when her best friend started dating Danika. She chose to poke and prod me every chance she could. To remind me that I was not a good person. And that she hasn’t forgiven me for abandoning her. So, I had to forgive myself.
“You’re a terrible person,” Livvy’s reflection says to me while I’m reapplying lip gloss in the bathroom mirror.
“Sometimes,” I admit, facing her. “And so are you.” I take in her two-piece coral prom dress, showing a sliver of stomach and a lot of leg with the dramatic slit. “You look pretty.”
She scoffs and rolls her eyes. “You are the strangest person ever. You don’t deserve any of your friends.”
Livvy pushes past the girls entering the restroom.
Darcy washes her hands beside me. “I’m stranger than you. Guess that’s why we otters deserve each other.”
I laugh. “Forever misfits.”
“Aren’t they a band?” She tries to recall, drying her hands.
“I don’t know. But they should be.” I offer her my elbow, and she wraps her arm around mine. “Ready to go?” Darcy nods.
We walk out of the bathroom and through the lobby of the hotel to the rented Yukon idling outside. Jonathan leans out the driver’s window. “Just waiting on you.” He winks, and I smile back.
Darcy climbs into the back, where the rest of our friends have piled in, ready to head up to Lake George and spend Memorial weekend at our family’s lake house.
Where, unfortunately, Gavin has been all day, supposedly getting it ready for summer.
Still, three nights without parents is worth having to put up with him.
Graduation’s in three weeks. Just have to get through finals before it’ll feel real. We’ve promised to spend the rest of the time we have together taking way too many pictures and videos. Laughing until we have to pee. And being as absolutely weird as we choose.
The three-hour drive is loud with laughter, stories and music. And goes by so fast; it’s hard to believe it’s nearly midnight by the time we arrive. No one’s been here with us before. After gawking at the size of it, there’s a mad rush to the nearest bathroom.
Gavin nearly gets run over when he opens the door. I shout directions to find each bathroom, laughing.
“I have a bathroom in my room,” I tell Jonathan, leading him up the stairs as he carries our bags. He’s still wearing his tux, minus the jacket and bow tie. Jonathan dressed up is a sight I will never get over.
I lift the silky skirt of my purple-and-teal holographic dress.
It drew my eye the second I saw it on the stylist’s rack at the boutique.
Mom took the girls and me to New York. They all squealed when I stepped out of the dressing room.
Even my mother, which was something I never thought I’d witness in my life.
“Is this bigger than your actual house?” Jonathan asks as we climb the curved staircase to the second floor.
“I… don’t know,” I admit. “Maybe?”
We always have a house full of guests whenever we stay here. Sometimes, it doesn’t feel big enough to escape everyone.
“This is my room,” I announce, flipping on the light and kicking off my flip-flops. My heels are still in the truck. Jonathan sets the bags down and closes the door.
“I don’t think so,” Gavin hollers, pushing it open before Jonathan can shut it completely. “You can stay in one of the guest rooms, Reeves.”
“Gavin, knock it off,” I say with a roll of my eyes. “He’s staying in here. Now leave.”
“If you get my sister pregnant,” Gavin warns Jonathan.
“Omigod, stop. I’m on birth control!” I huff and push my brother out of the doorway. “Mom put me on it, like, two months ago!” I shut the door in his face and lock it.
Jonathan’s stunned.
“I told you, right?” I ask him. “I swore I told you when my mom took me to the doctor.”
“You did,” he answers calmly, but stares at the door like he’s ready for my brother to break through it with an ax. “Don’t think I love your brother knowing it though.”
I laugh.
A fist pounds on the door. “Get out here before you get naked!” Collin hollers.
“I’m going to change,” Jonathan says, and I release a disappointed sigh.
“You can stay dressed like that for bed,” I tell him. He laughs at me. But I’m serious.
“I’ll meet you downstairs.”
I open the door just as Collin’s about to pound on it again. He gives me an obnoxious smile and holds out a bag of cheese puffs. “Poof?”
I take one and crunch on it while we walk down the hall toward the stairs. “I’m sad you won’t be with us next year.”
Everyone’s still changing, so it’s just Collin and me. My brother’s lurking somewhere, but he doesn’t matter.
“I know,” he says as we reach the bottom floor. “I don’t really have a choice.”
We cross the entry to the sliding door leading to the deck and the view of the water. There’s a basket of blankets beside the furniture. My brother did something right.
I sit on the big wrap-around sofa that surrounds the firepit that’s still not lit. He’s far from perfect. And I pat the seat next to me, wrapping a blanket around me. It’s colder on the lake than it was in Hollis.
“What does that mean? Is it because of your mom?”
“It’s because of money,” Collin says, plopping down with his own blanket. He sets the bag of poofs on my lap and wraps himself up. “I don’t have a scholarship or trust fund that will pay for school.”
Wow. I feel so dumb.
“Never thought about it, did you?”
He knows me. Too well sometimes. “No. I’m sorry.”
“I would be there with you—know that. And maybe I will in a couple years. This way, I can work and still earn money, take the core courses and hopefully qualify for decent financial aid.”
“Are you still planning to work for Hal?” I ask, making a face.
He makes a face back. “I don’t know. It’s really good money. But I don’t like working for the evil asshole.”
“Yeah. He is that.” I lean my head on his shoulder. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you’re friends with my brother.”
“Oh, I wonder why,” he says in a mocking tone. I pinch his side, and he jumps. “We all need friends, right?”
I sigh. “I guess.” I look up at him. “I’m calling you all the time; you’re going to feel like you’re with me.”
“I don’t expect anything less.”
A wave of emotion hits me.
“Hey,” he says, pulling me into a hug. “I’m not gone yet.”
“I know,” I say, my voice thick with tears that I try to fight back. “I’m just… I love you.”
“I love you too.” He kisses the side of my head.
“Wait. Are you guys together now?” Darcy asks, carrying a bag of marshmallows. “You are so cute together.”
“Nope,” Jonathan says, sitting on top of Collin, surprising us both into laughter.
Icannot believe you have your own balcony,” Jonathan says, resting his chin on my head.
I cuddle up on his lap, soaking in his warmth. “I cannot believe we’re still awake.”
“We can’t go to sleep now. It’s nearly sunrise.”
“Who knew you were such a romantic?” I tease.
“You didn’t?” He almost sounds sad.
I tip my head back and stare at him.
“I am,” he states emphatically. I nod, placating him. He mocks offense. I kiss his jaw and snuggle back into him. He squeezes me against him.
The sun’s rising.” The low rumble of his voice reverberates in my ear.
I blink awake, not remembering nodding off. I sit upright, kiss his neck and rest my head against his. He’s fixated on the sun splashing sherbet colors across the surface of the lake. “It’s pretty.”
“I want to make a promise to you,” he says, still looking at the horizon. I twist so I can take in his gorgeous features. I run a hand along the hard lines of his jaw and into the waves of his dark hair. His eyes find mine. And I swear I can see the rising flames reflected in their darkness.
“I promise to never hurt you. To always protect you. And to be the person you can talk to about everything.” His smile mirrors mine. “I love you, Sadie.”
“I love you too.”
Before I can kiss him, he shifts, and in his palm is a ring. It’s a smaller version of a Ring Pop, the stone suspended in a silver band. But the stone itself is the liquid color of candy.
I pick it up and examine it. “Can I eat it?”
He laughs. “It’s your birthstone.”
I look at him curiously. “My birthstone is an opal.”
“Also pink tourmaline,” he says. “I hope I’m saying that right.”
I inspect the gem, light pink fading into green.
“The woman who helped me pick it out said it’s watermelon tourmaline.”
I grin wildly. “Like my favorite Ring Pop.”
He nods. “It’s meant to protect your heart.”
I stare at him, my eyes instantly flooding with tears.
“Every time you look at that ring, I want you to remember that I promise to protect your heart.”
I throw my arms around his neck, and the tears start flowing. I can’t help it. “I love you so much.”
I slide the ring on the ring finger of my right hand and stare at it over his shoulder. I take his face in my hands and smother him with kisses. Sweet and sloppy. Until he steadies me and kisses me slow and not sweet at all.
He lifts me in his arms and carries me into the room. To bed. As the sun sparkles across the lake behind us.