Aj
Loud laughter jolts me awake. The sleeping bag is twisted around my legs, the fabric damp with sweat. I push myself upright, blinking in the half-light. The room is empty, the door cracked open.
Men are talking in Russian, their voices growing louder by the second. I glance toward the fireplace where Wolff slept.
His sleeping bag is rolled tight.
Did he even sleep?
My bones ache as I push myself up and walk into the living room. The fire is blazing in the hearth, and Savva and his men are drinking coffee from metal tins, cookware propped on a small gas burner.
Wolff stands by the fire, his back to me.
They all look up when I step in. A chill runs down my spine. My body freezes on instinct.
“Come eat, girl.” Savva grins. “We leave soon.”
Wolff turns and walks over, eyes never leaving mine. “Eat,” he mutters, grabbing my arm and pulling me away from the men. He presses a tin into my hands and nods toward the table.
I sit on a dusty bench, my stomach growling.
“Can you tell me where we’re going?” I ask as he sits across from me and sips his coffee, gaze fixed on Savva’s men.
He doesn’t answer.
“What’s the plan?” I ask, poking at the food. “Can you at least tell me that?”
Nothing.
He might as well be deaf.
Savva and the others laugh, talking in a mix of Russian and English. Relaxed and completely careless. Wolff is the opposite—stone still, observing every movement.
“Hey.” I nudge his boot lightly under the table.
His head whips toward me so fast that I jerk back. A scowl on his face, eyes bloodshot and bruised by lack of sleep.
“Stop talking and eat. We leave in twenty.”
“Did you sleep?”
He sets down his coffee hard enough that the tin rattles. “Christ.” He pushes up from the bench. “You talk too much.” Then he walks out the door.
Savva watches him go, a cigarette between his lips. I take a few more bites of food and shove the tin aside.
Savva laughs at something Sergei says, and then I hear it.
Akim.
My blood turns to ice.
“Did you say Akim?” I blurt, standing so quickly the bench scrapes. My tin crashes to the floor.
Savva raises an eyebrow. “Easy, girl—”
“What about Akim? Why did you say his name? Does he know we’re here?”
My stomach knots as every muscle in my body locks tight. I can’t go back. I can’t. Savva lights another cigarette, eyes narrowing. He doesn’t answer.
“Tell me! Why did you say his name?” I shout.
He exhales smoke. “Ask K9.”
“No.” My voice cracks. “No—” Heart pounding, I bolt out the door.
“Wolff!” I sprint toward the truck where he’s bent under the hood. “Does Akim know where we are?”
He slams the hood down, the sound echoing. “No.”
“Then why did they say his name?” I press, out of breath.
Opening the passenger door, he digs through a duffel. He draws a pistol, checking the clip.
At his lack of response, my panic ratchets higher. “I’m serious, Wolff. I won’t—”
He tosses a bag of clothes at me without looking. It hits my chest.
“Go change.” He slings the duffel over his shoulder and walks back into the house, done with the conversation. I stand there holding the bag as my mind spirals—Akim. If he found me…
I can’t go back.
I won’t.
I would rather die than go back to that hell.
Still uneasy, I swallow hard and walk inside, ignoring the laughter spilling from the kitchen. Back in the bedroom, I unzip the bag. Thick leggings. An oversized hoodie. Boots. I pull the leggings on, then the hoodie that swallows me.
My racing thoughts won’t stop. They’re getting louder, sharper. I need something to drown them out. Wolff won’t help. But one of these men has something, I know it. Pills. Alcohol. Anything.
I yank open the door—
—and slam straight into Wolff’s chest.
My mind goes blank as I reach for his belt, desperate for something to anchor myself before my brain caves in.
He moves instantly.
Wrists pinned above my head in one hand as my back hits the wall hard enough to knock the air out of me.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”
“Please—” I beg, but it comes out choked. “I need— I just need something to stop my head— I can’t— Please, Wolff, just let me— Let me touch you.”
His expression darkens, his jaw grinding.
“You won’t fuck me, fine,” I rush on. “Just let me use my mouth. I’ll make you come. Just give me something to focus on. I can’t think— I can’t—”
Panic and humiliation shove the words out of me. I’m unraveling, and I know it, but I can’t stop. His grip tightens until my fingers go numb.
“Stop being so fucking pathetic. Try that shit again, and I’ll cut your fucking hands off.”
Tears burn hot behind my eyes. I blink hard, trying to breathe, trying not to fall apart. He lets me go like it disgusts him to touch me at all, and the door slams behind him.
I sink to the floor. Knees to my chest. Arms around myself. Everything hurts. Everything is loud. I’m so tired. So fucking tired. But there’s no time to fall apart, so I drag myself up and force my legs to move.
When I step into the open area, my eyes lock on Sergei. Please. Please, have something.
He sits on a crate alone, drinking from a dented metal mug. Wolff is outside near the door, Savva and the others talking in Russian.
“Hey,” I whisper, crouching near Sergei. “Do you have any—”
His eyes sharpen.
“Drugs,” I whisper.
“Why?” His accent is thick.
“I just…need something to take the edge off.” My nails dig into my palms. “Please.”
His gaze drags down my legs. “You look like shit.” With a smirk, he sips his coffee.
“I can pay you,” I lie. “I’ll-I’ll do whatever you want. Just give me something. Anything.”
He leans in, breath hot with smoke. “I might have something.” His hand lands on my thigh. “But it’ll cost.”
My heart stutters.
“Come tonight. When your guard dog is sleeping.” His fingers slide higher. “You want to feel nothing? I can make you forget everything.” Pulling a tiny plastic baggie from his jacket with a few round, white, unlabeled pills, he slips one into my hand.
“You’ll sleep.” He shoves the rest into my waistband, fingers brushing my underwear.
I jerk back.
He laughs, lighting another cigarette. “Make sure the volk’s asleep,” he says, blowing smoke in my face. As I rush away, his laughter follows me.
Back in the room, I grab a water bottle, swallow hard, and shove three pills into my mouth. I don’t know what they are.
I don’t care.
I just need silence. Inside my head. Inside my chest. Just silence.
Even if it kills me.
AJ’s been out cold most of the drive, slumped against the far window in the back seat.
Thank fuck.
Silence is the only mercy I’ve had since dragging her out of that basement. When she’s awake, she’s always too fucking close. Always talking. Always touching. Like she can’t tell when a man doesn’t want a goddamn thing to do with her.
Snow blurs past the windows, the endless white swallowing the world. The road’s shit, and the truck keeps jerking through ice ruts.
Hours pass. The sky goes dark fast this far north. Another night in another shithole. This mission just never fucking ends.
We stop for gas. I grab two sandwiches and a bottle of water from the rear cargo, get back in the truck, slam the door, and toss the food into her lap.
“Wake up.”
She shifts at the sound of my voice. Eyes crack open. And that’s all I need.
Her pupils are blown wide.
My hand snaps out before I think. I grab her chin, pinning her head still when she tries to pull away.
“What the fuck did you take?” I bite out.
She mumbles something useless, barely words.
My grip tightens. “Don’t play stupid.”
She tries to look away again, but I force her face back to mine, fingers digging into her jaw.
“Answer me.”
When she doesn’t respond, I shove her back into the seat, unzip her jacket, and shove my hand under the hoodie, my fingers curling at her waistband. I feel it immediately. A warm baggie. I rip it free and hold it inches from her face.
“This shit? What is it, AJ? Who gave this to you?”
Her lips tremble. “Wolff…please—”
“Who. Gave. It. To. You.” I slam the bag against the window, leaving a smear on the glass.
Her whole body jumps. “S-Sergei.”
My molars grind as my blood boils.
Her eyes start to close again, eyelids fluttering.
She’s high. Really fucking high.
I hold her tighter, and she winces. “Was I not clear? When I told you to stay away from them?”
“I’m sorry—”
You will be.
I yank the door open and drag her with me. Her boots skid on the icy gravel as she stumbles. The men are leaning against the truck, smoking, laughing like they’re on vacation. Sergei looks up first. A smug grin spreads across his face when he sees her.
He scans her like property. Like she’s his.
My neck cracks when I tilt my head.
“I warned you.”
Sergei laughs. “The fuck are you talking about?”
AJ tries to pull her arm free, panic creeping into her voice. “Wolff—”
Savva steps forward. “K9, what the hell—”
I shove AJ forward. She slams into Sergei’s chest. “Lesson’s yours too.” I keep my eyes on her.
Sergei scoffs. “What are you—”
Bang.
His skull bursts apart. Blood and bone spray across the truck, the snow, her. His body collapses. AJ drops with him, screaming as his weight crushes her to the ground.
Her hands slip in the blood as she shoves the body off.
His eyes are still open.
“Wolff!” she screams, choking on a sob. “No!—” Her face is splattered with blood. Tears mix with it as she scrambles backward.
“You disobey me again, the next body in the snow will be yours.” I point my gun at her before holstering it at my waist.
Savva lunges forward. “Jesus fucking Christ, Wolff!”
“You brought a junkie into my operation,” I say, stepping closer. “You compromised the mission.”
Savva curses in Russian, grabbing Sergei’s jacket and yanking what’s left of him away from her.
AJ is hyperventilating as she tugs at her jacket that’s now covered in blood. “No, no, no…”
The sound grates against my skull. I snatch the back of her jacket and haul her upright, clamping a hand over her mouth.
Her body fights weakly against my grip.
“We’re done here,” I tell Savva. “Let the cops deal with the mess.”
Still covering her mouth, I drag her back to the truck and shove her inside. She’s shaking, her teeth chattering. Sobbing harder, she tries to wipe the blood off her face.
Let her wear it.
Let her remember.
I take the driver’s seat and face forward. Start the engine. Gripping the wheel so tight my knuckles bleed white. The truck roars as we peel out, tires screaming against the icy pavement.
We drive in silence.
Miles of black trees smear past the windows, the sky a dead, starless void. The radio clock glows 2:30 a.m., needling at my eyes. Exhaustion burns behind them.
Savva mutters in Russian beside me.
“Another change in plan? Or are you planning to kill me too?”
“If you stay useful, no.”
He snorts. “Your little girl is trouble.”
“She’s not mine. She’s the Sovereign’s.”
“Then why kill him?”
Because if I don’t return her alive and mostly intact, I might as well dig my own grave.
“We’re stopping at a safehouse.” Not my preferred choice out of the dozen variations I mapped, but it’s warm and the water runs. I figured I’d kill one of his men eventually—just didn’t expect it to be day fucking two.
Savva exhales smoke out of the cracked window. “Where?”
“South.”
I kick the back of her boot. “Get up.”
She flinches, curling away from the contact. She hasn’t spoken in hours. Her hands are still blood-streaked when she rubs her face.
“Where are we?”
On the outskirts of some forgotten town. Snow covers everything, thick enough to swallow footprints. The Sovereign don’t keep many safehouses in Russia. No idea when this one was last used.
Savva complains in Russian, carrying gear up the porch steps. Inside, he’s got a fire going. His men move around the house, setting up a perimeter.
“I have the back room. No one enters the hallway.”
I turn, and she trails me down the narrow, dark hall to the bedroom at the end with a small bed and an attached bathroom. I push the door shut. She stands in the center of the room, shivering.
“Clean up. Shower’s there.” I nod toward the bathroom.
Her eyes flick from the bathroom…to the bed…then back again, before she moves and closes the door behind her with a soft click.
Taking a deep breath, I pull off my shirt. Fuck, the house is cold. I unload my weapons—blade on the dresser, Glock under the mattress, second clip behind the lamp, my body on autopilot.
I hear the shower turn on, and I sit on the edge of the bed, elbows on my knees, head in my hands.
My pulse won’t settle.
My brain won’t shut up.
My nerves are shot to hell.
This is going to be a long fucking night.
She should’ve been done by now.
I run through the layout of the house again. Two exits. One blind corner. One weak hinge. Her movement through the pipes stopped thirty seconds ago.
That’s long enough.
I grab my knife and push the bathroom door open. She’s sitting naked in the tub, staring at the tile while water pours over her. Pink foam slides toward the drain.
She doesn’t look up at first.
“AJ.”
Nothing.
I reach past her and twist the faucet. The pipes groan as the water dies.
“You didn’t have to kill him.”
“He knew the rules.”
“But you didn’t have to.” She wipes at her face, smearing diluted blood across her cheek.
My eyes trail down her body, over the curve of her breasts and down to the soft patch of dark brown hair between her thighs. Images of stretching her tight holes flash through my mind. My cum dripping out of her.
My jaw tightens as my cock twitches.
“Why? Why did you kill him? You could’ve done something else. Anything else?” Her eyes water as she stares at me.
He’s lucky his death was quick.
“What did he want? What did he want in exchange for the drugs?”
Her eyes dart to the wall. “Nothing.”
“You really going to lie to me when his brains are still in your hair? You think I’m fucking stupid?” My voice rises.
“No.”
“Then answer the question.”
Her voice breaks. “He…wanted sex.”
I already knew. Still pisses me off.
“Told me to wait until you fell asleep. Then go to him.” Tears spill down her face. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you’d kill him. I just…I needed something to stop feeling. Just for a little while.”
I don’t say anything, and she blinks up at me.
“Clothes are on the bed. Hurry up. I need the shower.”
She grabs the little shampoo bottle with shaking hands and starts working it through her hair. I step out of the bathroom and shut the door behind me.
It takes a minute before my pulse settles.
Another two before I can convince myself not to storm out and kill the rest of Savva’s men. All of them are a risk to the success of this mission, and AJ is my biggest liability.